December already! Fledgings will sleigh the pre-Christmas clutter (and eat all the mince pies)

(1000 Posts)
GoingGoingGoth Sat 30-Nov-13 19:04:35

If you are strugging with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of chat, support brew, wine and cake along the way.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework - which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do someting more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

We advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

- start or repeat baby steps

- repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone

- reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

[And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.]

More info here on getting started and Flying lessons. Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings. Don't be put off by the barf-tastic language of the site - the underlying system is sound!

Thanks to BlueEyeshadow and SlimChance for the November thread. thanks

All welcome!! And remember that December is the new January! grin

ToffeeWhirl Sat 28-Dec-13 11:13:31

Silly - maybe you should prioritise one thing and concentrate on that. I agree with you that you will burn out otherwise. More importantly, I think you need time to come to terms with what you've been through/are still going through with Joe and should be careful not to overdo things.

Bitchy - oh dear, that's so hard, especially when you thought you were going to have some time to yourself. I hope DS calms down today and that you are able to sort out a good solution.

Blueandwhite - how lovely that you'll be seeing DS2 tomorrow. I don't know what 'The Tunnel' is, but enjoy.

dizzy - glad you arrived safely at BIL's and had a nice evening, though the journey sounds a bit harrowing.

Another lazy morning here in the Toffee household. Have just served pancakes with maple syrup again and am about to do my morning routines. Taking DS1 out to the skatepark again today. He has admitted that he's lost his nerve, so we are back to small steps as before. I will try not to get cross if he won't try the new skateboard again - lots of praise for what he has achieved, not focusing on what he hasn't. It's so frustrating though when he was doing so well.

Have finally run out of turkey <phew>, so have to do some food shopping later.

MIL is coming round for tea this afternoon, so that's a good incentive for me to tidy up this morning.

Hope all the fledglings have a good day.

Castlelough Sat 28-Dec-13 12:47:55

Hugs Bitchy that sounds like exhausting work. confused bear

Silly it's a great idea to come up with NY goals. Why don't you phase them in, working on a different area each month - as you get a handle on one thing, move on to improving another area. A bit like - babysteps! x

Castlelough Sat 28-Dec-13 12:49:23

Right, my main mission is to take cuttings from a rose bush today. From my grandparents garden, before the house is sold in the Spring. Have never taken cuttings? Have googled, but anyone have practical advice?

BitchytheGreat Sat 28-Dec-13 13:17:36

What about asking in the gardening section on mn castle some wise gardeners out there.

Ds has agreed to go to his dad's now but behaviour is still driving me up the wall. So today's to do list behaviour management /child wrestling

ToffeeWhirl Sat 28-Dec-13 13:39:29

At least that's progress, Bitchy.

DS1 is refusing to go the skatepark and also refusing to admit this is anxiety related hmm. Have managed to get him to agree to walk to the nearest park with his new skateboard for 10 minutes instead: babysteps again!

BitchytheGreat Sat 28-Dec-13 13:45:14

I have also arranged a babysitter for a few hours later. for a break wink ds has the option to come with me if he wants but has decided he doesn't want but he is allowed to change his mind right up to the point of me leaving however, i suspect i might have a few hours of peace. Which will set me up nicely for the challenging few days that he has coming up.

In the meantime i think i need to speak to his dad and see what we can get sorted.

EustaciaVye Sat 28-Dec-13 15:29:25

I havent got out of bed today sad Feel terrible. Dh and dds are at cinema watching Frozen. I really wanted to see it and have wasted a tenner as I prebooked the tickets sad

JustGettingOnWithIt Sat 28-Dec-13 16:09:52

Afraid it’s not great news here, but could be much worse. We’re soggy but not totally overwhelmed. We were well prepared and weren’t hit by the power cuts so the pump kept most of it out, but not all.

Embarrassed to say we just about managed Christmas dinner with a half decorated tree blush and then I lost the evening and all of boxing day, including the night, to totally out cold sleep! A large part of yesterday went there too.

We're limping along here, though grateful to say my nose is now pretty much nose shaped again. We've given up all semblance of normality or order and are going for surviving, eating, sleeping, and not arguing.

The hope is that tomorrow we might be able to get going a bit, but everyone's ill and just staying awake is hard work. I had no idea I was this exhausted, but it seems I am.

Eustacia what a shame.

Sorry so many are struggling with dc's difficulties over Christmas. It really does go with the territory.

Castlelough Sat 28-Dec-13 17:32:19

Trip to grandparents house was terrible. We arrived to find most of the windows and one door boarded up. Our key wouldn't turn in the other door. A neighbour informed us that drug dealers had broken in a month ago and squatted in the house and the police had eventually arrested some of them. Apparently our uncle (Dad's only sibling) didn't feel the need to inform my mother.

Now that Dad has passed away she has been pushing for him to sell the house (unloved and unlived in 14 years) but he is so difficult to deal with and so uncooperative. So sad things have come to this, and he still refuses to sell the house and share whatever little bit of inheritance might be left out with my mother.
Argh. Rant over. angry Grrrrrr.

Castlelough Sat 28-Dec-13 17:33:54

I did retrieve a bucket full of rose cuttings and got advice over on Gardening, thanks Bitchy.

EustaciaVye Sat 28-Dec-13 17:42:45

Seems gloomy all round for everyone sad

We have cuttings from dgm's fuschia that have come with us to four different houses castle!

AliceinWinterWonderland Sat 28-Dec-13 17:50:29

I have been absent for a few days, but it's been ridiculously stupid here, dealing with stress (with H) and kids. With any luck now, I can return to normal schedule from now until New Year's anyway.

Huge huge list of things to do, and I need to read back and catch up. A big glass of wine is on the cards for tonight. And then I need to make that huge huge list!!

Castlelough Sat 28-Dec-13 18:19:45

Eustacia that gives me hope!

Swanhildapirouetting Sat 28-Dec-13 20:09:04

Today has been fine again, but I think the children want some routines back! I had a brilliant idea that we reproduce school morning routines, except 3 hours later or even four so breakfast is at 11am on the dot, all washed and showered and sitting there, cleared away etc.

We are having great difficulty getting the children to get out their pjs atm everyone seems to be afflicted with go-slow-it is!

However, after guargantuan struggles an 11 year old dd went to a party, another 11 year old went with his Dad to a gastropub (long promised) and the laziest of all, 13/14 year old ds1 had to be pushed into a bath at 4.30pm fshock as he couldn't be prised out his bed where he was still watching Glee (a whole boxed set later). I made him walk back from picking dd up about 2 miles away, and that has worked wonders he has now reverted to relatively normal speech and manners (before that it was incoherent sobbing and grunts, and it'saholidayandyoucan'tellmewhattodowhocaresaboutShakespeareproject)

done
took an enormous pile of books back to library it was closed angry
made lunch from leftovers for ds2
made supper (Chinese version of leftovers) for five
drank some Prosecco,
talked to Sis on phone complaining about ds2, and family life(felt a bit gloomy whilst talking to her - but now feel much cheered - probably the alcohol)
wash in
wash away in drawers

loads of washing up to do now, but it is amazing how much wine improves life - not drunk much this holidays at all...

Swanhildapirouetting Sat 28-Dec-13 20:18:28

Castle my granny had an enormous myrtle bush in her garden that she used to point out to me because it was a cutting rooted from her wedding bouquet (60 years before) and that was moved from another house and garden too before it was eventually planted where she ended up. And she had a peach tree that she claimed was a stone thrown out from a picnic on the grass..

ToffeeWhirl Sat 28-Dec-13 21:10:54

Oh dear. So sorry for everyone's struggles.

Bitchy - how sensible to get a babysitter. Hope it worked out.

Eustacia - hope you feel better soon. Sorry you missed the film.

Alice - sorry about the stress and the huge, huge list.

Castle - that sounds simply dreadful sad. At least you got the rose cuttings.

Just - good to see you and please don't beat yourself up about the long sleeps - you obviously needed them. Glad you have a nose-shaped nose again. grin

Swan - absolutely the same here, with go-slow-itis affecting all of us. It was almost impossible for me to drag myself out of the door to go shopping today - I managed to leave at 2pm! DS1 was still only wearing his pants when he came downstairs to greet his grandma at 3.30pm blush.

Didn't manage to get DS1 outside, thanks to the weather changing for the worse and an afternoon of rain. Will try again tomorrow.

Cooked my first meal since Christmas lunch today. It was a chilli con carne, with lots of hidden, blended vegetables. Not tremendously successful, as DC left most of it. <sigh>

I need to tidy the house tomorrow as we have the relative-with-eyes-like-gimlets coming the next day and I need to live up to the previous visit. It exhausts me to even think about the work involved in tidying up for her. At least I'm not cooking this time - I just said, bluntly, that I was fed up with cooking and would rather we went out for a pub lunch.

ToffeeWhirl Sat 28-Dec-13 21:13:34

Swan - I can't tell you how relieved it has made me to hear that there is another boy who has been glued to his bed today. And I actually can't remember when DS1 last had a bath, but he is definitely due one!

EustaciaVye Sat 28-Dec-13 21:38:04

Mine havent bathed for a day or 5 so.

Headache starting to clear. My house is a tip.

BitchytheGreat Sat 28-Dec-13 21:51:22

You can get boys in baths when it isn't because of an inch layer of mud/sweat from sports? shock

the break was nice. seemed to suit ds as he was less clingy when i walked in but back to ulitmate clingyness within 15mins. hmm trying to get him to go to bed and stay in bed. It is not happening and we have a busy day tomo. Tbh i am about ready for bed. not sure if sleep will happen or not but lying down with eyes closed sounds appealing. Although i have just threatened to put him in the shower clothes and all if he doesn't get into bed and stay there. angry

Just glad to hear that you managed avoid a lot of flooding and i suspect that you probably needed all of the sleep so glad you managed to sleep.

WhoKnowsWhereTheMistletoes Sat 28-Dec-13 21:59:31

Go-slow-itis for me too, and DH who has been stricken by a bad cold. DCs are as lively as ever. They all arrived back from the ILs at about 3 having had a great time and DH has been on the sofa ever since, apart from making himself some toast. I slept badly, was awake for a long time in the small hours but then slept till 9 and was woken by the cats trying to batter open the cupboard where their food is kept. I then lazed around all morning (got dressed after 12) in a bad mood. I thought I would quite enjoy having the house to myself for a couple of days but I actually hated it. I am a bit prone to anxiety and have felt anxious about nothing in particular for the last few days, but feeling better tonight.

Anyway been more productive since everyone got home and done quite a bit of tidying. So ta-da!

OU work - enough to get me back on track
Hoovering - around piles of presents that are still homeless
Litter trays declumped
One kitchen cupboard emptied cleaned and refilled
Talk to neighbour about fallen fence panels
Tidying - lots of odds and ends that have been piling up in my big plastic tubs put away
Our bed changed, sheets washed and remade
Spare bed stripped and sheets washed
Two loads of laundry from yesterday sorted

Castle - that's so sad about your grandmother's house, hope it all get resolved without too much more upset.

Bitchy hope your afternoon went well, with or without DS, glad he agreed to go to his dad's

Just - glad you are no longer Rudolf-like and that your defences have held up, listen to your body and rest while you can.

Engels - glad you got back safely

Goth - thank you for carrying on with links and roundups at such a busy time.

Eustacia hope you are feeling better tonight

Alice - sorry things have been stressful, hope you get your few normal days.

Waves at everyone else.

Sounds like pretty well everyone could do with a return to normal routines, Flylady must be getting under our skins.

We've planned a day out tomorrow, after LENGTHY discussions, we are going to Avebury stone circle in Wiltshire.

WhoKnowsWhereTheMistletoes Sat 28-Dec-13 22:00:42

Nearly forgot, PA - are you lurking? I'm just off to stick the darts on the telly, hardly seen any so far, have you been watching?

Castlelough Sat 28-Dec-13 22:04:44

Swan I love your story about the myrtle (so romantic!) and the peach tree! Sounds too easy! grin

GoingGoingGoth Sat 28-Dec-13 22:22:25

Eek almost a 1000 so going to thread kill

GoingGoingGoth Sat 28-Dec-13 22:25:55
Swanhildapirouetting Sat 28-Dec-13 22:27:40

Whoknows I think if they all went away for a week I might manage to get a lot done, but two days...yes it is odd, I've tried that over summer when they went to Broadstairs (I stayed behind for the first two days) and it never seemed to be very restful, end up feeling rather bored and lonely instead of doing all the things I thought I wanted to, also staying up too late, not eating proper meals, and waking up late and generally feeling horrid and odd.

done
washing up
two children reappeared at 10.15pm angry shooed them back to bed, but not before ds1 escaped with a bowl of rice pudding, and dd had complained about her dressing gown being much too small hmm

Bitchy ds2 has calmed down now a bit. I think he has got more used to the Christmas scene, holidays etc, and is enjoying a new set of Subbuteo and doing lego.

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