I've been off from my job role for nearly seven months. I was suffering from severe anxiety and depression (honestly felt suicidal)
I was found a place at an alternative working base, and I am now into the fourth week of a month long phased return to work. To be honest I am still really struggling to keep calm, anxiety symptoms have come back and I'm overthinking everything while I am there.
I was told via email yesterday by my manager that she wants me to do a task tomorrow that I am absolutely dreading. I have to go to another hostel (I work in supported housing) and complete a service assessment with a person we will be taking on at my hostel at the end of the week. I've only ever done one service assessment before many moons ago and I'm far from confident at doing them. I told my manager I would prefer support for this first one, and her solution is for a member of staff from the hostel I am visiting to sit in with me! Obviously this staff member will have no awareness whatsoever of my situation and will be someone I've never even met. I also have to find the hostel alone and I have no idea where it is, other than that it's a fair distance from my work place.
I couldn't sleep last night for worrying about it. I actually feel sick with anxiety. I don't expect to be treated with kid gloves forever, but I really did think that my phased return would be much gentler than this. I feel like I am needlessly being placed in a situation that is going to cause me a great deal of anxiety.
I really feel like ringing my contact in HR and discussing it with her, but I don't want to come across as pathetic and incapable. I really wish I had just resigned the job like my instincts told me to. I feel dreadful after just four weeks back there.
What would others do in my situation?
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Is this fair for during a phased return to work?
8 replies
peskyfeelings · 02/08/2016 12:26
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