I wasn't sure where to put this!
I have two children aged almost 5 and 7, from previous marriage. I remarried last year and am very happy - new husband is a fabulous step dad and has no kids of his own.
I work three days a week and am qualified to post-grad level in order to do my job. I'm very academic (1st in my undergrad, distinction in my masters, currently publishing research etc) and have to be for my career. Do progress further, I would need to do a three year full-time paid doctoral course - no part time option available and very very intensive. I am toying with the idea of applying to do this next year (if they accept me!), as both kids will be at school.
But, DH and I would love to have a baby. I am so broody lately. I am 30 and he is in his 40s. I'm afraid that if I wait until after my doctorate, age will no longer be on our side. I get very unwell during pregnancy (severe early onset pre-eclampsia amongst other things) and both my kids were very premature. DH is also anxious about being an older dad, in his 60s by the time our child would be at uni. I'm scared my fertility will drop also, I have PCOS and struggled to conceive before, although not as much as some do, admittedly.
But if I have a baby now, I might never get to achieve the career hopes I have, as I would want a years maternity, plus most of my pregnancy off sick in hospital, then part time for 2-3 years.. I am afraid I'll no longer be on the ball work wise or academically and be unlikely to be accepted onto the course I want to get the promotion.
Any advice? I want to have it all but I don't know how to!
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5 replies
sevent · 22/07/2016 19:08
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