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Feeling terrible after job offer

10 replies

Saltedcaramellavacake · 26/03/2014 10:30

I have three kids, 6, 5 and 2.5. I've been a SAHM since my oldest was born. I've just been offered a (rare as hen's teeth) part-time job in my profession. I have wanted to go back to work. So why do I feel really terrible - scared of the job, frightened to leave the kids.
Does this sound like normal fear of change/the unknown and I just need to push through it and then rejoice in adult conversation and mental challenge or does it sound more like someone who just shouldn't be going back to work. Hit me, please.
Before I'm slated - I appreciate this is a first world problem and I'm lucky on all sorts of levels. But on the down side I have a husband who is away and works 80+ hour weeks so can't be relied on for anything related to the children during the working week and we live in another country from family...

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slartybartfast · 26/03/2014 10:33

congrats on the job offer!

what you doing for childcare?

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eurochick · 26/03/2014 10:34

Normal fear of change I reckon. Congratulations!

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heatseeker14 · 27/03/2014 17:07

I have just started a new job, it has taken me a while having been a SAHM for 8 years. I had turned down a job interview prior to this, because I had major doubts about my ability and was worried about child care in the holidays.
When this new job came up I really had to push myself because I had low confidence and was worried about everything.
Start looking into child care options once you have a plan in place it will make you feel better.
If you miss this chance now you may regret it later.
Good luck.

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Chunderella · 30/03/2014 08:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RandomMess · 30/03/2014 09:04

Completely normal, you've settled into your role as SAHM. Congratulations you won't regret it although you may take time to get used to the change.

Make sure you get childcare that makes your life as easy as possible and a cleaner and any other help that will make it possible.

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juneau · 30/03/2014 09:09

I haven't worked since my six-year-old was born either and I'd be TERRIFIED to go back to work! So I would say its entirely normal after such a big break. I think I'd feel the fear and do it anyway. And congratulations Flowers You've managed to do what many of us can only dream of.

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rubyflipper · 30/03/2014 09:15

Congratulations!
I went back to work FT after 4 years as a SAHM. I was apprehensive about how the family would cope with the change, but so far, so good.

My advice is to do whatever it takes to make life easier: get a cleaner, do your shopping online, zero tolerance to clutter in the home etc.

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Bobsmyaunty · 07/04/2014 14:39

Salted caramel, I clicked on your thread because your title says everything about I feel!

My circumstances are a bit different in that I only have 1 DD and she's 14 months. But I'd been looking for a part time job and despairing about not finding one... but then settled into being a SAHM and started to really really enjoy it.

The PERFECT job offer in terms of flexibility and pay came in on Friday and I have spent all weekend fretting and not sleeping because of it.

I've literally just accepted it, simply because I'm mad not too, but I still don't actually want to do it. I think, because as the posters above say, I'm a bit scared of the change. And scared of leaving my little one.

Everyone keeps telling me this is a good opportunity, I should go for it, and I have. But I still want to cancel it right this minute!!

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BertieBotts · 07/04/2014 14:40

Normal, I felt the same :) A week in and I loved it and wouldn't have gone back to being at home all of the time.

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Saltedcaramellavacake · 09/04/2014 05:24

Thanks, everyone. It's so helpful to know it is "normal" and how important it is to get a good paid support system going.
Bobsmyaunty, I feel exactly the same way - if the new employer suddenly said it was all a terrible mistake and withdrew their offer my overwhelming emotion would be relief! Good luck - I think we just have to push through the anxiety. It should be quite nice being in an office where people actually listen to me and I don't feel like I just get back to zero every day!

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