Other mums returning to work full time- want to support each other?

(475 Posts)
Tweet2tweet Sun 29-Dec-13 21:52:01

I just wondered if there are any other mums returning to work full time in the next few months who want to start a support thread? I am and I'm feeling really anxious. I'm also fed up at the shocked looks I get when I say I'm going back full time. It's not a choice but a necessity.

So anyone want to join and we can talk about how we are feeling and give some virtual hugs when needed?

YouAreMyFavouriteWasteOfTime Wed 12-Feb-14 16:20:25

I am newly pregnant and planning on 'working though' as I run my own business and its large enough I have to pay out a lot in salaries every month but too small to survive without me.

in some ways I think this will be easier as there wont be any going back to work after a prolonged leave. and I am sure many men don't want to go back to work after 2 weeks pl but they do and everyone survives.

eagleshepherdess Wed 12-Feb-14 18:49:55

Jaeger and LJ online all lovely, but I don't want to spend money on new clothes for work in the size I am now when I would really like to get back down to my pre-pregnancy dress size - 12. Not that there is any time in the day to exercise. Before my first pregnancy I was a size 10, but now must be 14. And especially much bigger round the boobs. I can't really afford new work clothes but the old ones from last year don't fit. And especially don't want to buy new ones that then don't fit in a few months. But I think Cos in particular does nice dresses that are more loose fitting.

My daughter will be 12 weeks when I go back to work on 2nd March. I am interested to know what others do with childrens' bedtimes - my 3 year old DS goes to bed at 8pm - the currently 9 week old DD goes to bed anytime between 8 and 9pm and still wakes 2-3 times in the night. I still BF to sleep. I hope that as she stops waking so often she'll start going to bed with a proper routine and go down before 8pm, closer to 7pm, so she is well rested - when she eventually sleeps through - and wakes 6 or 7am. But what do people do with early bedtimes and trying to get home from work to see babies before bedtine? I have a short commute but still probably won't get home before 6.30 or 7pm most days. If DD is going to bed not long after that - 7pm seems pretty sensible for a three mo - then it doesn't leave much time to see her...

PumpkinPie2013 Sat 15-Feb-14 13:50:40

Can I join please?

I am going back f/t in late Aug when ds will be 9mo sad

My dh also works f/t. We will be better off with me working even after childcare and can't afford to live on dh wages so I have no choice. Weirdly if I went p/t we'd be much worse off even with less childcare hmm

We've chosen a fantastic nursery which I'm sure will make things easier but not looking forward to leaving my little man all day sad He'll do 8am to latest 5pm but a bit earlier one or two days p/w.

Finding time to do everything - work, time with ds/dh plus housework and shopping is baffling me at the moment. I've no idea how I'll manage but I suppose you do.

I do love my job and not sure I could be a SAHM long term even if we could afford it but doing 3 or 4 days would be nice.

Sadly p/t jobs are hard to come by x

PhoneSexWithMalcolmTucker Tue 18-Feb-14 09:14:46

Just getting myself back on this thread - I start a week on Monday. Going to a staff training day next Monday, which will be a good head start, so we're doing settling-in sessions with the CM this week. I need to do a wardrobe audit! Not sure there is a week's worth of workwear in there after three years of slopping around at home.

Tiredemma Tue 18-Feb-14 10:04:06

Just dropped DD off at her new nursery for a two hour settling in session.

sad

If I didnt have to go and collect her I think I would be hitting the Gin right now

allchik Thu 20-Feb-14 08:37:46

Hi....can I join? My dd is 13 months, went back teaching 4 days a wk with wednesdays off in sept but will be returning 5 days a week in June. Althoigh it was kind of my decision to return full time I am starting to get the guilt sad

Tweet2tweet Thu 20-Feb-14 21:38:20

Welcome pumpkinpie and allchic. I know what you mean about juggling everything pipe, but it's doable. Just don't expect to do much socially during the week ;). I try and do as many chores in the evening and if I ever get a pay rise or job with more money I think I'd try and get a cleaner!!

PhoneSexWithMalcolmTucker Fri 21-Feb-14 00:26:15

Tiredemma hope you're feeling a bit cheerier about it now sad My two had a great time with the CM yesterday and are going back tomorrow, but they are that bit older than your DD which I'm sure makes it easier. Also they've been bloody hard work this half term, which has helped me feel pretty good about impending childcare grin

1908Violette Fri 21-Feb-14 17:55:26

Have a look at the career workshops available on this website:
www.flexijobsglobal.com

Very helpful!

Notverygirly Sun 23-Feb-14 18:47:14

I have been lurking in the background. Back to work for me tomorrow... School bag is packed. Husband is doing the drop off as I will have to leave the house at an ungodly hour. Wish me luck.
Right now I am cracking open a celebratory bottle of delicious wine to mark the occasion.

Tweet2tweet Sun 23-Feb-14 20:15:11

Good luck notverygirly, I will be in the same boat in a weeks time. Same set up too, yikes.

Just think of the positives, you'll be fine.

PhoneSexWithMalcolmTucker Mon 24-Feb-14 12:47:10

I am sitting on a bench in the sun, eating a sandwich by myself...

I know it won't always feel this good so I'm celebrating the fact that it feels damn good right now! smile

Tiredemma Wed 26-Feb-14 08:40:46

I went into work yesterday to meet with my manager and get a heads up on what has been going on. Saw lots of colleagues who were all excited to see me which was nice.

Lots of issues occurred during my absence which I am now itching to get back and resolve.

I am actually now quite looking forward to returning. Not looking forward to rushing around chaotic in the morning to get there on time though!

poppeb Thu 27-Feb-14 11:56:20

i think the morning will be a nightmare tired i don't want to pass the stress on to my baby so will have to try to be swan-like! i think getting everything ready before hand is the key.

i am using my accrued holidays to do three days initially so am planning to lay out 3 lots of clothes and make sure i have three easy things in for dinner on a sunday.

Tiredemma Thu 27-Feb-14 12:10:12

I plan to batch cook 4 meals on a sunday morning (when DP and DS1 are out at rugby)- I will then store these in the freezer for each evening- just to be pulled out and reheated.

cheminotte Fri 28-Feb-14 07:34:09

We don't batch cook but do double portions and freeze the other half for at least 3 meals per week.This includes curry, chilli , pasta sauce and homemade pizza. It's no extra work and sometimes we even enough to have a spare 1 person portion to have with a jacket potato if eating alone. I also have a routine of a n online shop on Sunday evening for delivery on a Tuesday..

Tweet2tweet Fri 28-Feb-14 14:08:08

Good luck all mums returning next week. I am and will keep on posting ;)

Tiredemma Sun 02-Mar-14 17:28:58

all ready to roll!

uniforms ironed and laid out

cottage p[ie made for tea tomorrow

lunch made

im quite excited!

PhoneSexWithMalcolmTucker Sun 02-Mar-14 22:38:39

Ha ha, I was just coming on to post something similar grin. I've packed DS's bag for school, packed DD's bag for the CM, made all the lunches, got my outfit sorted, signed my contract, packed my bag, meal planned for the week AND taken stuff out of the freezer...just need to get some sleep now.

Good luck for tomorrow! smile

cheminotte Mon 03-Mar-14 06:30:33

Good luck to everyone going back today!

queenofeverywhere Tue 04-Mar-14 08:59:03

I'd like to join this discussion. My DD is 3 months and I'm due to return to work full time in June when she is 6 months. I'm planning on using accrued leave to work 3 days initially then 5 days from August. Trying to pursuade DH we can get by on a single salary for a little longer so he can use some of my remaining ML for EPL. Anyone else's DH/DP taking EPL? smile

Notverygirly Tue 04-Mar-14 20:55:12

A week and a half in...
I now remember how much I was starting to hate my job.
New senior team and a new boss adds to the complexity, but it pays the bills and is stopping my brain from turning to blancmange.
The upside is that DD gets on famously with our nanny and nanny share. I found it a more flexible arrangement than nursery.
I don't think about her at work because i don't see her in the morning- I just hear her gurgling away on the monitor before DH gets her up.
I have been dropped in it by the DH a few times because he has been working away from home at zero notice. I don't have much contingency so will have to work on that one.
The fridge is pretty empty- had to dig in the garden for something to eat for supper before the food delivery arrives.

Hope all is well with those returning this week.

PhoneSexWithMalcolmTucker Tue 11-Mar-14 22:59:42

So how are we all doing so far?

This is my second week of work, and I have to say, I LOVE IT! The job is interesting, busy, my colleagues are nice, people are generally pretty chilled...location-wise it's very convenient (I even drove home this lunchtime to hang my washing out!) The house is less messy and there is less general shitwork to do because we're not here so much. As a SAHM I was washing up 3-4 times a day sometimes.

The DC have done brilliantly so far in adjusting to the change. DS isn't that affected since he's at school most of the day anyway, but he loves bundling with the other kids after school grin DD has shed a few tears, which seems completely reasonable to me, but actually has settled much better than I thought she would. The CM is very nice, which helps smile That said, DD has woken up most nights since I started, crying for me and needing cuddles or wanting to come into our bed. So I guess she must be feeling somewhat unsettled.

Hope everyone else is forging ahead and enjoying not having a handbag full of nappies grin

sparkle101 Wed 19-Mar-14 15:03:51

Hi

Please can I join you and seek some assurance the house isn't going to fall down and my children aren't going to hate me when I go back to work in two weeks.

I have dd who is 3.7 and ds who is 8mths. In between the children I returned to my full time retail manager job but put my five days into four, this meant I didn't see my dd two days a week but freed up an extra day to fit in appointments, housework etc. I also have an hours commute to work.

I love my children dearly but have found myself all through this maternity wanting to go back to work. I'm worried I won't be able to do it, that I'll be a failure, not helped by my boss telling me just how AMAZING my replacement has been.

Gah, I'm rambling...,,, it'll be okay won't it?!

Backtobusiness1 Mon 21-Jul-14 22:12:04

Hi there fellow hard working mums!

I think this is a great thread and as a HR professional and a mum, I have set up Back in Business (BIB) a company designed to offer advice and support to the many many mums like you and I with... the dreaded return to work!

My company, Back in Business (BIB), provides workshops aimed at mums in the following circumstances;

Returners - workshops designed to support mums returning to work both from a period of maternity leave (upto 12 months) and also mums returning to work after taking an extended career break to raise their families.
Switchers - workshops designed to support mums who have already returned/thinking about returning to work but no longer feel their current/previous role fits with their new motivations, skills & family needs.
Entrepreneurs - workshops designed to support mums who would like to explore working for themselves in order to achieve a better work/life balance/meet the needs of their families.

In brief workshops will cover topics such as, How Do You Do it All?, Tackling Fears, Doubts & Guilt, Career Clinic, Flexible Working, Confidence Building, CV Masterclass, Interview Support, Applying for Jobs, Taking the Plunge, Networking, Starting a Business, Taking Control of your Working Life.

If this sounds like something you could benefit from please get in touch to register your interest! Our website and social media pages are in the process of construction and you will be kept up to date of our launch and upcoming workshops so that you can ensure you book yourself a place! Spaces are limited.

Please feel free to get in touch with any queries at all about the support we offer and how you can benefit.

Email;

backinbusiness@post.com

Regards
The Back in Business Team

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