Advice please for grumpy DS ( and his Mum!! )

[crystaltips]

Please can you help me ...
My DS is 11 and up until now has been quite a mild natured little chap - but that's all changed now - and having given him the spanish inquisition ( he's being amazingly open ) I can only assume that adolescence is beginning to kick in.

He's being bolshy with us at home - and sweetness and light with his mates .... and I know that this goes with the territory so I am not in the least bit bothered about this .... BUT it's trying to explain to him that this is normal and that his hormones are kicking in.

He's also very tearful - which is really pi$$ing him off - but I just don't think he understands what to expect and this this is how he SHOULD feel.

In a nutshell I want to make this transition as easy as possible for him - he just seems a very confused and upset little soul .

Advice please anyone ?

[crystaltips]

I know - I know ... should have put this in "Behaviour/Development"
Doesn't change the content tho' ... can you help?

[coppertop]

My ds's are a lot younger so no advice but:


BUMP!

[coppertop]

My ds's are a lot younger so no advice but:


BUMP!

[coppertop]

Oooops! Make that 2 bumps!

[Blu]

Crystaltips: I'm sure there are loads of people who will have a persoective on this...maybe not around at the moment. What about a title like 'boys starting puberty - any experience?'

[Blu]

And NO experience of this but it sounds great that he is willing to be so open with you - has to be a good start, well done!

[motherinferior]

Well, he has a lovely Mum, that's for sure

[crystaltips]

Off to start that thread Blu ... thanks ..... I know that I am being thick but ... what does BUMP mean please ?

[crystaltips]

I'll tell him you said so MI ... don't think he's agree with you at the moment

[Blu]

Bumping it up to the top of the list

[crystaltips]

DOH!

[marthamoo]

crystaltips,

I don't have much in the way of words of wisdom - my eldest is only 7 (though well in training for Kevin the Teenager status) but it really sounds to me like you are doing the right things. Keeping the lines of communication open is the single most important thing - you may not always get it but so long as you are available to listen, it's a start.

I can highly recommend Jenni Murray's book "That's my Boy" and one of the things she said in that really made a lot of sense to me. She said she has invariably had the best dialogues with her sons "side by side" not "face to face". Driving the car, or preparing dinner with them helping alongside her, they opened up far more than if she sat them down at the kitchen table and said "right, son, what's bothering you?"

Don't know if that's of any help at all as I'm all with the theory and have yet to experience it for real: but you sound like a lovely Mum and he's still your little boy under all the angst.

[marthamoo]

Had a quick search on amazon (it's the librarian in me, I always think a book might help!) and found this

Worth a look maybe? There are several others on there of a similar nature too.

HTH