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Some nice herpes questions for the early morning!

(17 Posts)
ricecakesrule Wed 27-Aug-14 08:22:55

So... I have a cold sore. I had one a couple of weeks ago too, on both occasions they appeared a few days after giving my dh oral sex. Having just had a baby, we'd had a break of a couple of months of any sexual contact and we have had no problems with any sti issues in the past (although I have had normal cold sores before many years ago).

Basically my mind is going into overdrive convinced that he's had sex with someone else in the past couple of months, got genital herpes without symptoms and has now passed it on to me. I know they are different types of herpes but I understand that it is possible for oral sex with someone with genital herpes can give you cold sores?

The fact it had happened twice - not sure if this makes it more or less likely? Can you get a cold sore from herpes exposure if you already have dormant herpes anyway?

Any advice greatly appreciated, no other reasons for me to suspect dh having an affair other than usual post-baby and hormonal insecurity!

tabulahrasa Wed 27-Aug-14 08:39:49

Wouldn't you have noticed if he had active herpes sores?

I get cold sores when I'm run down, tired and stressed...I can go years without any then get them close together.

I'd think it's probably more to do with having had a baby tbh.

flanjabelle Wed 27-Aug-14 08:42:34

If you have had cold sores before, you already have the virus. It is just a coincidence that it has popped up now.

ricecakesrule Wed 27-Aug-14 08:52:03

Thanks, yes I read though that even genital herpes can have no symptoms, don't know how common that would be though. Very much hope it's just coincidence and being a bit run down!

shakethetree Wed 27-Aug-14 08:54:21

Hi op :-)

I think it's rare to catch the virus if there's no active blisters, ( although not impossible )
I've had the cold sore virus since I was 15, ( I'm now 45 ) I've never passed it on to dh either through kissing or oral sex, we've been married 22 years!

Try to relax, you're putting 2 & 2 together & coming up with 1079.
I'm not sure about the immunity thing as they're two different viruses ( although physically the same )
If I were you I'd maybe get peace of mind advice from a sti clinic - don't google because you'll end up thinking you've got aids, get reliable advice from professionals - just to stop you worrying. :-)

BranchingOut Wed 27-Aug-14 08:54:29

Herpes, once you have had it, lives in the central nervous system and when you are tired or run down, it travels back down the nerve to the same place where you had it before.

There are two types, HSV1 and HSV2.

HSV1 commonly causes cold sores, but can also be genital herpes.
HSV2 generally appears around the genitals.

Something like 80% of the population carry the herpes virus, and it is triggered when we are run down and knackered. So I also think it is the new baby making you tired that is the cause of the issue.

Remember that you should avoid kissing your baby as herpes can be dangerous to newborns.

BranchingOut Wed 27-Aug-14 08:58:53

HSV1 is generally only transmitted when there are active sores.

HSV2, I think there is some chance of transmission but it is very rare. Not totally sure about this.

Apparently changing sexual practices mean that clinics are seeing more cases of HSV1 occurring around the genitals, whereas it used to be the case that only HSV2 occurred down below.

BranchingOut Wed 27-Aug-14 09:00:56

Edited to add. I mean that with HSV2 transmission also occurs when there are active sores, but I think rarely it can also happen when there is not. But not sure about that information.

ricecakesrule Wed 27-Aug-14 09:30:39

Yessssss... So I may have confronted dh about it yesterday blush - he pretty much had the same reaction about me jumping to conclusions, as well as being a bit miffed to say the least. It just seemed like a massive coincidence.

ricecakesrule Wed 27-Aug-14 09:47:19

To clarify, the coincidence would be that my existing hsv1 has come back at a time when I'm actually not that exhausted comparatively (ds2 much easier baby than ds1!) - rather than my cold sores being as a result of new hsv2 virus from dh...

Don't think there's any way to actually know though, even an sti test wouldn't prove if it was a new virus or something that has been dormant in either of us for years.

I was hoping for a definitive trashing of my theory - I.e. if I did contract hsv2 from dh 2 weeks ago, would further oral sex with him be irrelevant as then I would have the virus... Or could I effectively "catch" it again and get cold sores again (which is what has happened).

Or maybe staying up late having nookie is wearing me out!! Thanks all for your sane responses, my poor dh must think I'm going bonkers!

BranchingOut Wed 27-Aug-14 09:49:59

Ok, never mind. smile
Hopefully he will put it down to postnatal stuff.

BranchingOut Wed 27-Aug-14 09:54:45

The simplest and most likely explanation is that your oral HSV1, which you have had before, has recurred.

ricecakesrule Wed 27-Aug-14 10:18:25

Thanks branching out, I know you're right. I haven't even been watching Jeremy Kyle to get me into this state. grin

Germgirl Wed 27-Aug-14 10:41:11

The HSV1 = cold sores & HSV2 = genital herpes thing just isn't true any more. We test genital swabs for both types & find about a 50/50 split between the types. They can both cause genital herpes & they can both cause cold sores.
It's very very likely that your HSV1 has re activated itself, maybe you are more run down than you think.
You do need to be careful that you don't pass the virus onto your partner while you have active sores.

ricecakesrule Wed 27-Aug-14 11:05:36

Thanks germgirl!

orangefusion Thu 28-Aug-14 21:25:41

Poor you. Why not ask dr about oral acyclovir or valtrex tablets? Keep them handy for outbreaks or take as suppresant.

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