Binge Eating - how do I break the cycle...?!

[Looneymum]

I am sure there are already threads on this topic so sorry if I am going over old ground.... here goes! I have basically binged for as long as I can remember (I am 40 next year). During some of my life I have managed to control it, probably because I was at work, although there are always a good few eating hours when getting home. Since having the kids and not working, things have reached a peak. Take today for instance, I have been this morning and done a step class at the gym which works well as the kids (DD1 aged 4 and DD2 aged nearly 2)go to creche. Once back home though as lunchtime approaches, I managed my two salad rolls, the kids leftovers then some chocolate and sweets. DD1 is now at pre-school for a couple of hours whilst DD2 has a nap. I have already spotted the chocolate icecreams in the fridge and know there are some spicy crisps just crying out to be eaten. So here I am, hoping that someone can tell me what this is all about. Why do I feel so desperate to eat until I feel like I am going to burst, only then waiting until that feeling goes so that I can eat some more...? Any thoughts... please help.. Oh, by the way, I am about three stones over weight.

[Beauregard]

Dont know what the solution is to be honest!
I am usually dead strict with myself and eat low fat food most of the time but i binge occasionally until i feel sick and i cant eat anymore ,this is always followed by guilt and horror and me promising myself never to eat crap again!
Bad relationship with food i guess.

[sanchpanch]

i am the same and struggle every day with it, i have recently lost 3+ stone, mainly because me and my ex p split up and i am struggling to lose the last few stone, every day i say that i will be good today but i am always so bad,

I think you can get counselling for over eating and there is over eaters annonymous,

i would love to break the cycle, i am always thinking about food, most of the time when i am eating i cant even taste it

i would love to have a binge on fruit and get the same feeling that i get when i binge on crisps,

I try not to have to much junk in the house but i always seem to manage to find something somewhere

[apronstrings]

I amn the same - I have cried on the wy to the shops with the intention of buying a chocolate cake to eat!

I am not too badly over weight these days but feel like a food addict in the way oprah winfrey describes...I think about food all day - I am conscious of everything I put in my mouth, I eat really sensibly in waves and then fall off the wagon and binge..

Every day I get up saying today is the day I will stop

I am in tears now posting this...do I sound like a lune?

Will be watching this thread

[Arabica]

I've been a lifelong binge eater with episodes of bulimia until my mid 20s (am now 44). The only thing that's helped has been psychotherapy, to help me discover the underlying depression that was causing it. That's not always the only way to help--lots of others have been able to sort binge-eating out with CBT or help from self-help books/groups. But if it's a very entrenched behaviour, there are no quick solutions, I'm afraid. Good luck, and you are not alone!!

[apronstrings]

bump

[apronstrings]

This has been on my mind all day - arabica did you start at the gp?

Looney mum have you ever had any professional help ?

I feel that I need help with food rather than some underlying problem..am I wrong..does it all relate to self esteem? should I have changed my name?

[Dior]

Message withdrawn

[apronstrings]

Not buying stuff doesn't work for me - I eat something else! good luck with weight watchers...I have never tried that.

[themoon66]

Ive been doing the same most of my adult life. I thought i'd cracked the problem, only to replace my binge eating with binge drinking (see dependent drinkers thread)

I think it gets to be a habit. I know there are certain times of day when I cannot resist eating the contents of the fridge. And my mind wanders around the pantry, thinking what's in there for me to have a go at, even when I'm still at work.

[sparkler1]

When I was doing slimming world - to try and stop myself eating all the wrong thing - I would prepare a bowl of easy to reach "snacks". It's all too easy to reach for foods that are ready to eat ie crisps, cakes etc. Prepare a bowl of peeled and chopped up fruit, chopped up salad stuff so it's there and ready just to pick at.
Try not to buy all the things that you feel are your weakness, I know easier said than done. Also another tip is try not to go shopping on an empty stomach and this makes you buy even more "rubbish".
I'm far too overweight myself and know what it's like to eat far too much.
HTH xxxx

[Looneymum]

Hi everyone. Wow! I am certainly not alone. I was always convinced that whilst my kids were at pre-school/having nap, I was the only one trawling for pick and mix. That all said, I think my binging has reached an all time high. Even after posting on here yesterday, I headed straight for the fridge. I have never had any counselling. I did once go to the docs very upset and asked for obesity drugs. With a BMI of 28, I appeared to be borderline. The doc refused (very sensibly) but I didn't ask, nor did he offer, any further help, even though I was obviously distressed. I truly wonder whether anyone has ever cracked the binge thing. My husband says I just need a project or something to distract me but the fridge is always lurking in the background....

[themoon66]

Distraction works up to a point I find. I sit playing on DS's gameboy till me thumbs are numb. Anything to keep my hands occupied. Sewing is another distraction. I also go running, which gets me into a more healthy frame of mind. But I know my binge eating is only a heartbeat away all the time... like a monster in my head trying to bend my will. I'm managing to keep my weight down, but only by getting on the scales every single morning and concentrating on keeping my mouth shut all day if i've gone up even one pound. God, it takes over your life doesn't it? Is it possible for any woman to have a normal relationship with food??

[Arabica]

apronstrings, yes, I did start at the GP and was referred to an NHS eating disorders clinic, who in return referred me for NHS psychotherapy. I didn't feel comfortable with the therapist, left, managed on my own for a while and then decided to go privately as I knew the waiting list for NHS therapy would take too long.
If you can commit to twice-weekly therapy there is a v cheap service called the Blues Project available from CAPP (where my therapist trained amd where I am hoping to do my training). Here is a link Scroll down the page for info about the Blues Project. Unfortunately most (but not all) of the therapists offering sessions on this programme are London based.
I think attempts to modify your eating behaviour with groups like Slimming World can be very valuable but unless you understand why you overeat and what your triggers are, and learn to do something else with those feelings, you will always revert to bingeing to deal with the feelings because it is the only effective means you have of shutting them away. You may not even be aware you are beginning to have the feelings--I wasn't!

[Looneymum]

Today, have managed to go to the gym and have not succumbed to binge mania - as yet! Did have peanut butter and cucumber sandwiches as they seem to give a nice full feeling as well as being yummy - musn't dwell on fat content though but imagine still better than 4 bags of crisps and a couple of choc bics! Binge feeling gone for the moment. Could be as I have just dropped DD1 off at primary school for a "taster session" as she starts in September and it was a bit stressful/tearful - a good dose of upset always supresses my appetite. DH has just rang to say he fancies a glass of wine tonight and I just know that will signal the crisp/takeaway-fest.....

[sanchpanch]

i have been better this week and managed to lose 3 lbs....

i have been having a bowl of frosties when the girls go to bed which seems to keep my craving at bay, or i eat them dry, it seems to keep me satisfied...
and it helps that i have had no crisps in the house as dd has had hot dinner at school, because i could easily eat 6 bags of crisps
i love crisps

[Looneymum]

I know it doesn't really solve the route of the problem but what about the LighterLife or Cambridge Diets. I did the Cambridge Diet in the 80s and it was grim - perhaps it has changed!? I wonder if I just kick start a bit of weight loss it will help my motivation and stop me wanting to binge to sabotage it all.

Well done Sanchpanch, I too need to bin all crisps from the house but DH probably would be none to pleased...! I agree with the Frostie idea, it's just when the Lurpak/cream cracker monster calls, frosties don't seem to cut it - is there any hope?

[Arabica]

Looneymum, those are just short-term solutions. It's not about the weight. It's about feelings.

[Oblomov]

I am a terrible crisp binger.
Only crisps.
I can eat 4 or 6 packets, on the trot.
I don't know why.
But it must mean some deep hurt, somewhere along the lines.
As Arabica says, its all about feelings.

[Earlybird]

Don't fully understand the concept of "triggers" - what sorts of things can those be, and what exactly does one do to "manage" them?

[SSSandy]

Isn't there an additive used in crisps which makes you addictive? I remember there was a lot of talk about it last year but I can't remember the name of the ingredient. It's in all those potato snacks.

[Looneymum]

One of my triggers is Lurpak! Once I have had say a slice of toast with Lurpak, I just can't seem to stop. I put it on rice cakes/crackers - the thicker the layer the better. I have tried other spreads and it definitely curbs my cravings as they are just not as tasty. The answer is not to have it in the house ...

Reading this back, I feel like such a weirdo!

I really think I need to go down the counselling route. I can't seem to find anyone local to me (W. Yorks) and am a bit afraid of getting a "duff" one as so many people seem to have had poor experiences.

[schneebly]

Hi - just popped in to say that I am another one who thinks about food all the time (apart from when I am putting it in my mouth!) The 2 occasions where I have gained a lot of weight in a short time have been when I was depressed. I am currently seeing a CPN for PND and going to Slimming World at the same time with my DH and I am still struggling but have lost over a stone so far. I am a SAHM and I think boredom is part of my problem. I have applied to do a degree because I need to start using my brain again and want good prospects for the future. I am hoping this will keep me busy and increase my confidence enough to stop thinking about food so much. I got a letter through yesterday telling I was in so roll on September! As you can see Looneymum you are definitely not alone!

[Looneymum]

schneebly, thanks for your post. I also fancied doing OU type thing but have decided I am too thick after reading some of the course specs! I must have truly deep rooted low self-esteem issues (or perhaps a bit lazy!). I have just started doing some computer/graphic stuff from home, basically just doing party invites and personalised cards with photos of kids and themes etc. Have taken payment for first order which was great and definitely kept my hand out of the biscuit tin. This said, I feel guilty asking people to pay. Husband is an accountant and he worked out that for bespoke invites, ink, paper, printing time, my time etc I should charge at least £1 per invite. No more orders placed as yet, so I too am bored again which makes me think this is the route of my problem and the reason I am permanently stuffing my face. Although, have just had breakfast and am happy for the moment..!

[danceswithmonkeys]

Add me to the list. Yesterday I went to WW weigh in in the morning so it then felt like a 'free' day before the dieting started again the next day so came home and stuffed my face with treats until I felt sick. Then felt so guilty I just had a bowl of soup for dinner to try and make up for it. I am already seeing a therapist to deal with other issues but I know food is a real release for me. If I'm on the way to the shops to buy a chocolate cake I'm not crying (although I understand why) I'm excited . I try now to keep my bingeing undercontrol (although clearly failed yesterday) and just let myself 'indulge' at special times like on holiday. Tragically sometimes look forward to these events just because I know I will be able to eat, eat, eat. Food is such an emotional thing for us women isn't it? Dh just eats when he is hungry and that's about it. I'm overweight, he's not. Go figure.
Schneebly - well done you! Sounds like you are taking some really positive steps to overcome this!

[danceswithmonkeys]

Looneymum, I'm another terrible boredom eater too. Nothing to do....reach for the biscuit tin
Why does sweet/fattening stuff taste so much better than fruit and veg?!