Dyspraxic (but also lazy) teen starting A-Levels advice please

(3 Posts)
OhSoVintage Sat 03-Sep-16 11:17:36

So my daughter excelled at her primary, very bright, top of class for everything apart from maths and sport, amazing at Drama. Went to a top independent high performing secondary with subsidised fees.
You can guess we had high hopes, however at secondary the dyspraxia came through in a big way. The disorganisation, dyscalculia, huge emotional and social issues, just one big roller coaster.

Anyway long story short all her friends came out with straight A's and she just scrapes 5 A-C but high A's in English. She was vomiting in half her exams through nerves and had to be in a separate room plus she didn't nearly revise as much as she should have done and followed none of the help that was put in place to help her organise and revise efficiently which she struggles with due to her dyspraxia (which I think is almost a denial thing).
The school where happy for her to stay at A-Level on her assisted fees which is unbelievable! But encouraging as they must see something in her! However her confidence is at an all time low and dyspraxia aside she's also incredible lazy with zero motivation.
The options at her school are very geared towards working for Russel Group uni's. She's not aiming for that and unlikely to get in with her GCSE's anyway not that it would have mattered as she's not that kind of person. So we have decided (since results day, complete whirlwind) to put her into our local state secondary (which is ofsted outstanding) where she can do a Drama Btec (which seemed better than A-Level Drama and double English at A level, perfect subjects for her.

The idea is she wants to aim for a Top Drama School and have the English to fall back on. (She is up there amazingly talented at Drama but worried about her motivation as I know these are almost impossible to get into and you won't survive on talent alone no matter how good you are)

Now here is my concern! Since the GCSE results, we had tears etc She wants to do her A levels and wants to do well but Im extremely concerned about her levels of laziness.

She just spends her life talking to friends on her phone with no interest in anything else.
I cleared her bedroom the other day which has built up all summer (took me a full two days, yes it was that bad rubber gloves job!) and all I asked her to do was change her sheets. A week later and she's sleeping without a duvet cover having done half the job but couldn't be bothered to put the sheets on!!!!
Ive found her summer pre A-Level english reading list screwed up under her bed. I am pulling my hair out!

Since results day when she realised she didn't get her Maths C and will need to resit in November she hasn't so much as sniffed the Maths revision books I put on her desk. Choosing to sleep or talk to friends online. Ive tried disconnecting the internet but she just then sleeps instead!

I know she really wants to do well as she was genuinely devastated with her GCSE's. But its like she's got this disconnection with reality. She doesn't realise whats required or the impact of her actions. You try to talk to her and she just thinks your over reacting.

Im so so worried about her going into A-Levels, she so wants to do them. But at the moment I can't even see her passing her Maths resit let along two A level English!. Its devastating to watch and I just don't know what to do with her or how I can get it through!
She is such a bright and talented girl with a quirky personality and I can see her over the next two years just wasting all the talent away!

Has anyone got experience with Lazy teens or/and teens with dyspraxia and had any success at all?

At the moment every tactic Ive tried seems to have failed and Ive tried ALOT sad Any advise no matter how small welcome!!!!!!!!!

TeenAndTween Sat 03-Sep-16 15:51:49

Hi,

My DD1 has dyspraxia and is about to start her second year at college. We have a BTEC Support Thread running over on the secondary board. We have had a very bumpy first year as DD also doesn't 'get' that she has control over her choices and the choices have consequences.

I guess you have 2 choices
- go with starting A levels, and accept she may need to 'restart' a year later with a BTEC
- go straight for the BTEC

Either way, 6th from requires organisation, and working during your 'free' periods. DD has needed help structuring this time as she appears to be unable to do it for herself. To be honest I am dreading the next 10 months.

Best wishes.

OhSoVintage Mon 05-Sep-16 14:01:02

DD is doing both. Btec is alongside her two A-levels. Im really hoping as she's doing things she enjoys things will start to improve. At the moment its hard to see

I do feel like I've let her down at the moment sad Just want to get her back on track, but thats easier said than done!

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