so. our children are grown up and we are now thinking about fostering

(6 Posts)
catsrus Sat 27-Jul-13 21:55:08

Hi Vicar

your house sounds a bit like mine grin. I looked into fostering a few years ago when my dcs were a similar age. I decided against because of all the issues around safeguarding - and the constraints that would place on my own dcs. I was told by the SW I spoke to that the kind of "open house" we were used to would not be appropriate for fostering as the children would need a stable and non-chaotic environment. Any of my DCs friends who were to stay overnight on a regular basis would have to be CRB checked and the dcs habit of coming home from a party at 3am with a few waifs and strays would have to stop.

I can see all the good reasons why safeguarding needs to be taken very seriously with looked after children - but I decided, in the end, that it would not be in the interests of my own DCs to make these kinds of changes while they were in that 'interesting' phase between being needy children and leaving home for good. I didn't want to ever discourage them from coming home with their friends in the early hours if that was the safest course of action.

I haven't given up on the idea - but it has been put on a back burner for a few years.

ThatVikRinA22 Fri 26-Jul-13 02:26:01

thank you - im going to call the local authority next week. i had thought about SN respite etc, but will look into all aspects. im very pleased that we have got our son to the point where he is independent of sorts....

dd said today why not just have another baby....lol...bless her! no chance!
but i do feel we could really do some good for some children who need it - im not after more children of my own, just feel we could help those children who are in need of a bit of stability and love - my house is an open house anway - we have all manner of things in need of a bit of TLC (from rats, to cats, to dogs and various stray friends of the kids!)

may as well do it officially i reckon....

thank you for the kind words of encouragement - at work i am seen as the mother hen....i am. i cant help it. i may as well put it to good use!

fasparent Fri 26-Jul-13 01:21:59

Agree with Rosh you would be great, We have done the mill been through all the ages, has been great lots of fun , most important is including your own family they must not feel left out, after 38 years we just look after baby's now, But again this is harder when they move on are replaced with another, so you never get a real break been several years for us night and early hour's feeds etc., but the outcomes are rewarding also our large extended family love them all .
Special need's rest bite care is another area or SN Short break Foster Carer. Could use your experience.

Kindest Regards

ThatVikRinA22 Fri 26-Jul-13 00:26:07

thanks for the reply - i broached it with DD today, at first she wasnt keen but then decided that if i have a girl up to 5 it would be ok!! she is in for a shock i feel! had to explain its not like going to choose a puppy!

anyway - im letting the whole idea sink in a bit for her.....she would need to be on board too if she is still living at home by the time we do it.

might just contact local authority for some info.

Roshbegosh Thu 25-Jul-13 18:16:55

Yes you sound like you would be great for fostering. They are desperate for carers for teenagers most of all but whatever you are happy with, I am sure, will be welcomed. The short term placements can become long term though but either way it is very rewarding to help a child like this. Good luck.

ThatVikRinA22 Wed 24-Jul-13 22:06:13

Dh and i are discussing this more in depth now. I am very keen to foster. My kids are grown up - one has left home (he has SN and is 21) and my youngest is 16. This is something i always thought we would do - i myself was at times a "looked after child" and i feel we could offer stability to other children in need. We have been married 22 years, both work full time but i have the option of flexible working.

I am not remotely interested in the money and we would opt for fostering through the local authority. My house is full of waifs and strays anyway....

what do we need to know? i was thinking short term placements for children 0 - 11.....

where do we go from here to find out more?
thanks

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