Waiting.......

[happydaze22]

Hi All,
After my last placement ended in July I didnt think it would be long till the next placement came along. Three months down the line I'm not so sure. Apart from 3 "nearlys" nothing has happened at all and I'm finding myself sitting around bored stiff and twiddling my thumbs. I just wondered if anyone else is or has been in the same boat recently. I'm with a LA by the way.

[BusterTheDonk]

not been in that position yet, although our link worker does keep us updated, saying they have a surplus of carers at the moment and that she doesn't feel like many kids are 'coming through' at the moment either.

Also says that the 'pickier' you are, the longer you will wait, and that preference is certainly being given to people who will do all of the transporting.

How many can you take and what age ranges? If it is quite restrictive, can you consider being re-approved to make yourselves more 'available'?

I'd hate to be in this situation... so I can only sympathise and offer a

[happydaze22]

hi BTD,
I'm approved for 0-10, 2 or 3 if siblings, and I do the transporting as well. I havent been picky yet...I havent had the chance to be picky yet . Oh well, hopefully soon...

[NanaNina]

It does tend to be "feast and famine" with children coming into the LA system, but am surprised that you have waited this long, especially with such a wide ranging "offer" - I am just wondering if more people are turning to fostering because of redundancies etc - have no idea if this is the case - was just wondering. Have you thought of childminding as you can do both together.

[scarlet5tyger]

Hate to say it but I really think children are being left in vulnerable environments as a result of the lack of funds available at the moment. I know personally that a child I moved a while ago is now living with relatives and not being cared for properly (I haven't seen him but other carers have reported their shock at his appearance and behaviour). We've all reported our concerns to his SW but have been told that although Social services acknowledge the placement isn't working ideally they are reluctant to move him back into care.

I also know a nurse who had to fight tooth and nail to get a social worker involved when a mother was brought into casualty after attempting suicide. Her baby was at home with it's alcoholic father who couldn't even sober himself enough to attend hospital with his partner. Social services told the nurse it was late and they didn't want to wake the baby up!!!

Every foster carer I know has stories like these at the moment and the cynical side of me truly believes it will sadly take another Baby P case before anything improves.

[bonnieslilsister]

oh scarlet, that is so sad if that is the case....I prefer to think it is too many foster carers. xx

[NanaNina]

I don't think it's the case Scarlet5 that children are being left in vulnerable enviroments because of lack of funding. There is no doubt that the huge cuts that this govt is forcing LAs to make all sorts of cut backs, and there will be protestations from whoever is affected by the cuts, naturally. Thing is applications for Care Orders have increased by 50% since the Baby P case, as social workers have been loathe to continue to try to support families (as was the case with Baby P) and are getting these cases before the courts.

The business about the sw not wanting to wake a sleeping baby, sounds to me like an EDT worker, hoping to pass it on to the duty social worker next morning. Should have been a priority though.

Quite why Baby P hit the headlines in the way it did, I have no idea, because at least 20 other babies had been killed by their parents/step-fathers etc in the year that Baby P was being abused and none of these got into the media. I recall a child dying in the LA in which I worked and the parents pushed the child around in a push chair for an hour before taking her to hospital and she was dead on arrival. It was mother's boyfriend who has caused the death, as is so often the case.

Yes, there will be another Baby P case, and Baby XY and Z - because so long as there are people out there who have been too abused, neglected and emotionally damaged in their own childhoods to be able to provide a good quality of parenting, sadly this will be the case. I have never met a parent who has abused/neglected their child that has not had a very dysfunctional childhood him/herself. Violence breeds violence and we parent in the way that we were parented, with the odd exception. These abusing parents are simply too emotionally immature to care for a child's needs, as their own needs have never been met. There will almost always be a big gap betweem their chronological age and their emotional age, so in lots of cases, you are seeing mothers functioning around the 11/12 year old mark, and putting their own needs before the child.

Very often it is mother's boyfriend who is the abuser, and a mother who fails to protect because she too is afraid of the violent boyfriend.

Social Services are "on their knees" at the moment with huge caseloads, 20- 30% vacancy rates (more in the inner cities) and high sickness rates with stress related illnesses. They are having to spend around 70% of their working day in front of a computer screen, filling out forms for the children on their caseload, which is really a box ticking exercise. However even if none of this was the case, and SSDs were fully staffed etc, did not have to make cuts, it would not prevent children dying at the hands of their parents or step parents etc.

Sorry I am going off on a bit of a rant but I think there is still the issue that social workers are "damned if they do, an damned if they don't" and their first duty is to keep families together wherever possible, but it's a fine line between supporting the family in the hope that their parenting will improve and removing a child.

[sharenicely]

Hi Happy I'm really surprised you've been waiting so long. As soon as I had been approved I got a phone call. I had about 5 in the space of a fortnight (they forgot to remove me from the list once I had a placement).
I know our LA are having to place children with private agencies as they don't have enough carers.
I quite like the sound of a 3 month break at the moment!

[happydaze22]

Well someone must be looking down on me from above....I now have a lovely 8 week old baby to care for.

[BusterTheDonk]

aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh.. see, post on here and look what happens!!

Hope baby is well settled and you enjoying it so far...

Very very best of luck... welcome to the mad world of fostering... (if it helps, 13mths into it still having OMG moments & still emotional about silly things)

[bonnieslilsister]

I have a 7 week old happydaze, we should compare notes!! He was 5 days old when he arrived, such a sweetheart.....along with a 3 yr old we have had since he was 18 months. Life is complete!! xx

[SquidgyBrain]

enjoy happydaze :)

buster - you and me both!!

bonnie - you sound so happy :)

[bonnieslilsister]

Yes, I am happy (and relaxed despite moving house shortly and having no time to pack!)

[bonnieslilsister]

NanaNina I am sending you a pm

[happydaze22]

Hi All,
Having LO is wonderful , even though he now rules the roost . He is a very happy little man even though he has a little bit of a wind problem when feeding. Hes a good little sleeper too . His sw is absoloutely brilliant as well ensuring that we have all the info we can possibly need re contact , meetings & health checks etc. All in all this little man was well worth the wait

[BusterTheDonk]

Well done - sounds like one happy house...