I need a rant. And a slap. Or something.

(17 Posts)
Mydogsleepsonthebed Sun 30-Sep-12 17:47:15

I was going to name change but I can't be bothered. And I don't really know how. DP has gone to London on Friday and then on to a country somewhere really not awfully pleasant. I don't know when he will be back. I think before the end of November but he doesn't know nor do I. I have no way to get in touch with him. And if I desperately need him then I have to contact a certain office and they will try to get a message to him. I hate this. I know it's what he does and he's always done it since before we were together but I hate it. Slap me, flame me, or something. I always find the first few days hard.

NotmylastRolo Sun 30-Sep-12 18:57:58

Would a hug do? Sending you lots of hugs and good vibes and hope it gets easier. I have never had to face anyone I love going to somewhere where it is impossible to call them to say "hi - are you ok?". Must be hell. Would send you a lorry load of chocolate if I could too (works for me when I feel sad).

Mydogsleepsonthebed Sun 30-Sep-12 19:06:24

Thank you. Chocolate is always welcome grin I am normally not so stressy about it but this time for some reason it's just hit me. I don't know why.

SoggySummer Sun 30-Sep-12 19:09:52

Hi - I know how you're feeling. I am on day 6 and feeling really crap too. Weekends are long and boring and Sundays utterly crap. I never feel like I can call people on a Sunday and say fancy a cuppa because its their "family time". I have felt like crying a few times this weekend but have not caved in yet.

Have a hug and some wine.

Mydogsleepsonthebed Sun 30-Sep-12 19:11:47

Thank you Soggy. Sorry you're feeling crap too. {{hugs}} and wine and chocolate

pimmsgalore Sun 30-Sep-12 22:30:08

I'll join your club we are feeling all Sunday is crap here too, although did get a call from DH today so DD is feeling better. This is the first one I've done where it has only been me and DD, my 2DSs and eldest DD are at boarding school now and I am really struggling this time. Doesn't help that where we have been housed all of their DHs have just started arriving home for 6 months and welcome home banners are everywhere (DD was very upset about it today)

Hug and wine all round I think, I am keeping a diary this time as I don't think DH actually knows how hard it is being this end and holding all the day to day stuff together.

pimmsgalore Sun 30-Sep-12 22:31:29

*for = from blush

Mydogsleepsonthebed Sun 30-Sep-12 22:32:07

Pimms - I agree, I don't think DP realises how hard it is being on my own - it's not that I can't do it because I've done it on my own before as a single parent, but oh I dunno. Hugs for your DD too. Poor her that must've been difficult.

Saltire Sun 30-Sep-12 22:35:01

My DH only has aobut 6 weeks to go but by god has it been hard, I actually think that it's only the vast combination of pills that I take thats stopping from losing the plot completely

I think we all feel more stressed at some times than we do at otehrs. I know I ahve had some terrible stress, especially with DH being you know where, and dealing with MIL - we won't go there tonight - DSes, dog, my mum the whole thing in general

SoggySummer Sun 30-Sep-12 23:33:58

Awww sorry to see so many of us having a tough time atm. I have been in this game a long time so DH being away is nothing new but oddly the build up to this (with the inveitable deployment departure dates ever changing) has been horrendous and I know its only week 1, but I cannot remember ever feeling this down about it.

Both my DC are now at boarding school so its just me and I have not managed to get a job here yet so I have ALOT of time on my hands but now working 3 full days voluntarily at our thrift shop in an attempt to keep my self semi sane.

sailorsgal Tue 02-Oct-12 14:38:12

I think the first few weeks are hard as adjusting to just been you and the kids. I spend the weekends at my inlaws as this is the lonliest times, particularly Sundays. I usually plan things for me to do such as go to the gym or have a facial and start a diet. grin I get my Sex and the City box set out and watch it again for the 50th time and watch movies I know dh wouldn't enjoy.

WeatherWitch Thu 04-Oct-12 16:46:08

10 years serving myself, been with DH (also serving) for over 6 years and still struggle sometimes with the lack of contact. DH is currently at sea but only in UK waters so no op welfare package or paradigm etc, but out of mobile range. Had to tell him about miscarriage by email which was a bit arse.

Agree entirely that Sundays suck! My mother is staying this weekend and we're going shopping. Oh yes.

Wirrick Mon 12-Nov-12 10:09:01

First time on here and its reassuring to know others feel the same when H is away - I thought I was going mad the first time he went away then the second time I was shocked at how badly I felt I coped.
To mydogsleepsonthebed, I hope its getting easier and yes, I felt very resentful being in quarters the first time he went, as everyone's hubbies were here and it really peed me off, which felt very bad and something I'm quite ashamed of. This is quite an old post so i hope you've got into a routine and the wine has been free flowing ;) xx

SoggySummer Mon 12-Nov-12 20:53:32

I am having a really crap time at the moment. For the past week I have been in the most awful black mood. Lots of issues with the kids and I just wish he was here to sound off to and give his thoughts on the matters. He has not been in touch for over a week now and last time it went quite like this it was 3 weeks of zero contact, so feeling a bit glum.

I think I need a slap but am trying the chocolate method instead.

Hopefully, this week will get better and my mood life - I bloody hope so.

Wirrick Mon 12-Nov-12 21:10:56

I hate the lack of contact side of it, then how strained it is when we do speak after so long it can better of we hadn't (i always use the post it note trick so I can remember things I've been doing) we are only expecting our first child so I'm going to be facing that challenge next time he goes.

Hope you hear soon and all is well.

X

Clumsyoaf Thu 29-Nov-12 16:43:36

Im so glad there is somewhere here where other people are describing what I am feeling... i dont want to change nappies or read books or play with kids.. i just want to hide under a duvet until hes back. I want the phone to ring and it be him, I just want everyone to stop saying chin up!

And Wirrick good luck x my husband was away for both of our kids, i had both on my own. It is a lonely life.

gillybeandramaqueen Wed 27-Feb-13 00:19:22

Oh god. This is so depressing. I am so sad and sorry to read how bad you're all feeling... and it seems I am also about to be thrown into this world... I'm 10 wks pg with first child and bloke is currently in process of applying for the Marines... I feel utterly dejected and stressed at a time when I should be happier than ever......... :'(

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