Child that doesn't eat! HELP ME!!!!!

(48 Posts)
Fifi2406 Thu 22-Aug-13 15:47:45

My DS is almost 2 he used to be such a good eater would eat pretty much all the things I gave him or at least put it in his mouth and try it! Now he will eat breakfast (2x weetabix and a slice of toast) and that's it...all day! He will possibly have a banana but then that really is it, I've not done anything differently to when he was eating before no sudden changes of what I was cooking and also not cooking the same things all the time so he got bored I feel like he had a good varied diet. Now he won't even have food on his high chair tray as soon as I bring any food near him he says no and pushes it back at me or passes it back and says "thank you" I've tried him sat at a little table not strapped into a high chair, I've tried from my plate, I've tried ignoring him and just eating mine ive tried grown up plates, ive taken the highchair tray off and brought him right up to the table with a special little mat I don't give him anything else if he doesn't eat his dinner as this is what my HV advised and she said he would soon give in! Well this has been going on for months now and it's driving me insane! What he would eat if it was up to him or if i offered would be crisps, he's had them before at parties etc I don't keep them in the house (or I would soon become the size of a house) or he if I were to present him with toast for lunch and dinner, or baked beans he would happily eat those! I'm at my whits end and now I've had a few people say hasn't he got skinny and he was never chubby to begin with now I know this could be because he's growing length ways and losing a bit of the babyness but with his terrible eating its really worrying me

Please give me advise on your experience of non eaters when will he eat like a normal human? He is sooooo hyper all the time and I really don't understand where his energy comes from living on a slice of toast and weetabix.
confused Also his poos are absolutely horrendous and I'm sure it's because he doesn't have any kind of balance in his diet

Sorry this is long and probably got bad grammar and spelling smile

Fifi2406 Thu 22-Aug-13 16:01:15

He also mm's at food he sees in pictures or on the tv like an apple he says "apple yummy and mm's" I go to the kitchen straight away and get him an apple and he pushes it away and says no???

magimedi Argentina Thu 22-Aug-13 17:00:24

I can't advise you as my DS is now adult & was a good eater, but I didn't want to read & run.

If you don't get nay joy here (it's not the busiest section of MN) why not try reposting this in parenting or report your own post to MNHQ & ask them to redirect it to where you might get the most traffic.

Hope you get some help.

gamerchick Thu 22-Aug-13 17:13:58

Just give him what he'll eat for the minute and some supplements. Take away the pressure and the attention. He'll see its getting a reaction from you. I fell right into the battleground with my first.

With my third if he wouldn't eat he was fed readybrek. At least I knew he was getting some sustenance. He's had a lot of that stuff the past few years and Drs struggle to believe me that he's been a bad eater.

Fifi2406 Thu 22-Aug-13 17:14:03

Thank you for replying! smile

Fifi2406 Thu 22-Aug-13 17:14:15

I'll repost elsewhere

littleducks Thu 22-Aug-13 17:33:54

Would he eat other food if presented at breakfast time? Maybe something that us a small change like WEETABIX, banana and toasted pancake cake instead of toast?

Would he eat WEETABIX or toast later in the day?

For now try not to react (so much easier said than done) and whatever you do don't force feed him.

Has he even shown any signs of reflux?

Fifi2406 Thu 22-Aug-13 17:51:47

He would eat weetabix or toast at anytime of day, I've offered him things we normally would have for dinner for lunch and for breakfast but he won't eat it then either, he used to sometimes have a crumpet or pancakes and I've offered those but he won't have any of it!

No sign of reflux he does have a dairy allergy but is perfectly happy with soya milk in his breakfast

Fifi2406 Thu 22-Aug-13 17:55:09

Also I manage to stay pretty calm I just continue with my dinner whilst he sits in his high chair asking for toast hmm

BaldricksTurnip Thu 22-Aug-13 17:56:24

I would probably give him smaller bits and bobs throughout the day tbh. If he likes toast, would he eat toast dipped into an egg? Or spread with different things like marmite/dairylea etc. or even cut up and dipped into humous?

snowlie Fri 23-Aug-13 08:42:58

I'd cut out all snacks, sweet drinks etc and make sure he's hungry when he sits down to eat with you and sees you eating the same food as him. Will he eat chips - homemade I mean? Carrots, cucumber and cherry tomatoes always go down well - stick a selection in front of him and let him choose.

NoSquirrels Fri 23-Aug-13 08:56:36

I think two weetabix plus a slice of toast is quite a lot for an almost two year old. He's eating a big breakfast so he's not hungry for much else later in the day and has fallen out of the habit of eating, because he knows that even if he's hungry he'll be able to eat toast and weetabix the next morning. You're understandably keen to fill him up at breakfast because he eats so little during the day, so it's a vicious circle. Does he drink much soy milk?

What I would try is to cut down breakfast to one weetabix and some banana, then save the toast for snack-time with different toppings, give a lunch of snack bits and pieces, so he can choose what to try, don't give a snack in the afternoon, and then cooked tea/dinner. Do it for a few days, varying what you offer for breakfast so you break the habit a bit, and see what happens. You need to do it for at least a week, and stop yourself worrying about him starving - he really won't. Keep a diary of exactly what he eats and you'll see.

It is all about control, but what you need to do is remember that you can only offer the good stuff, he has to decide to eat it. But you are in charge of what's on offer, so keep persisting.

newbebe Fri 23-Aug-13 11:07:09

Hi,

I also think 2 weetabix is to much, my 4 year old would struggle with that.

Have you tried giving a different breakfast? i.e just fruit if he doesn't want it, let him get down, and keep it at the table so he can come back to it.
good luck

ThisIsYourSong Fri 23-Aug-13 11:14:01

Have you read the book 'My child won't eat' by Carlos Gonzalez. I haven't read it but it comes really recommended.

It's so hard isn't it! Ds3 often goes to bed without eating dinner and I hate it. Doesn't seem to bother him though. I don't agree with cutting out any banana though as they are really nutritious. What about a smoothie? I know Carlos Gonzales recommends grazing plates.

pingulingo Fri 23-Aug-13 11:41:26

I'm watzh

pingulingo Fri 23-Aug-13 11:45:23

Bah, I'm watching this with interest as my 2yr old DS is very similar and now refuses a lot of things that used to be firm favourites. He also now refuses to try anything new. I leave new food on his plate and at best he will taste it by sticking his tongue out before throwing it on the floor. I'm hoping its just a phase.

noblegiraffe Fri 23-Aug-13 11:49:43

If he would eat toast or beans if you gave him them for lunch, then I would give him that. Beans on toast isn't actually that bad a meal.

If he is losing weight and looking skinny, then I would ditch the HV advice of starving him into submission as it is not working and present him with food he likes.

I'd also cut down on his breakfast to try to introduce some variety, that sounds huge! He should be having vitamin supplements anyway (DoH advice) so definitely give these if not already.

WinningBread Fri 23-Aug-13 11:58:57

Someone mentioned Carlos Gonzalez's book 'My child won't eat'.

I'll second that - it's fantastic!

My toddler just wouldn't eat, but after we followed his advice, she's like a walking dustbin!

Fifi2406 Fri 23-Aug-13 13:39:59

He doesn't have snacks, he's never really had them and he only drinks water so I don't think that
is a problem for him not being hungry because he has always just had 3 meals a day which he used to eat so well and had 2 weetabix and toast for a year and always would eat lunch and dinner with no problem he doesn't sit still ever he is very very active and since he has been able to walk we have gone on 1hr+ walks daily so he ate a lot but has always been slim! All of a sudden he just started to refuse any food that wasn't toast or weetabix (or if he see's someone eating crisps etc he will beg for them but doesn't get) I will look into that book suggested and cut down his breakfast to see if he is more hungry later in the day

I have also done the log book thing and every day for the week he had 2 weetabix and a slice of toast and nothing except water for the rest of the day even though he was offered a variety of things cucumber different types of sandwiches/wraps bits of chicken, carrots hummus beans egg he just refused everything I gave lunch and dinner

The only food he will even let me put in front of him without him immediately pushing it off or giving it back to me is weetabix or toast its not just a case of him only liking certain foods and i just stick to those things he doesn't seem to want any other food at all! i agree beans on toast is not a bad meal but if I put beans with toast he would refuse to eat them and just eat the toast! I can't give him toast for every meal forever as this is the only thing he "likes"

I will get that book and see if that can work for him and reduce breakfast

Thanks all!

Panzee Fri 23-Aug-13 13:43:05

I also have a non eating child. I've downloaded the book, thanks for the recommendation. Will see how we get on!

Notrightnowww Fri 23-Aug-13 23:06:14

My dd was a bad eater at that age, would go all day on 1 oat cake and an orange. She's now 5 and though slow at eating and a bit picky, she has a decent balanced diet and we don't battle about food too much, so please don't think this is forever!

At the time we were recommended iron supplements by GP - if you're anaemic it suppresses appetite, apparently. After a couple of days my dd started being hungrier and eating more, so might be worth a try.

I really sympathise, it is terrible to watch your child rejecting food and that you've made especially to be nutritious. Things changed slowly for us, no magic answers. I cut out alternatives, snacks, and milk on HV advice to make sure she was hungry when meals were offered.

I remember tearing my hair out about it, good luck!

Bumblebee78 Fri 23-Aug-13 23:23:50

Mine is the same, i hope it is just a phase! I cant believe our DS can actually have enough food in him to make a poo but he does! I honestly think he must go down to the fridge for food in the night cos he isn't overly skinny.

Im going to try the book others have recommended. You have my sympathies, it is so frustrating, and it isn't just you, I'm right in that boat with you!

Fifi2406 Sat 24-Aug-13 00:16:16

Bumblebee - glad to know its not just my insane child that doesn't want to eat please let me know how you get on! smile

Notrightnow - ahh I was hoping there was a bit of magic I could use to sort him out but soooo good to know he will probably grow out of it! About what age did she start to eat a bit more?

BumbleChum Sat 24-Aug-13 01:43:17

In what way are his poos horrendous? Are they pale and floaty?

coffeewineandchocolate Sat 24-Aug-13 06:54:17

How does he eat when with other children? My ds will eat all sorts when there is 'competition' for it

Could you leave a snack out for him to go to and from while playing? Eg cubes of cheese, crackers, even tiny squares of toast with different toppings.

Does he help in the kitchen at all when you are baking/ making things? My ds will eat all sorts if he has helped prepare it...

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