"I believe in the occasional snacky lunch.." Roll <<your eyes>> up for a gloriously poncetastic blog...

(120 Posts)
snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 19:18:47

Snacky lunch? SNACKY LUNCH???

"For this one I packed soppressata, Castelvetrano olives, Red Leicester cheese, ricotta salata, and purple carrots. To go with, whole wheat bread, a British cheese cracker, and roasted pumpkin seeds" waffles Amanda, blithely unaware of even the hint of the existence of Dairylea in the self same universe as hers.

Caveat - the food is fab. Really good. Healthy, delicious, well-sourced, eye-wateringly expensive and beautifully photographed. In my dreams, Walker and Addie are standing at the foot of the kitchen island like a Shining throwback as Mummy's art director snaps their lunch and makes them late for Conversational Mandarin again.

It's lunch for 6 year old twins. Hide the Babybels and the grudging pb&j you threw together last Wednesday because this weeks new best friend has Nutella every day and allowances must be made (although at one point even Amanda grudgingly allows a morsel of 'commercial candy' on the grounds that someone had foisted it on her darlings at a party through the medium of a pinata)

Even goop isn't this pretentious - it feels like my tornado hell for epicures - I await the vomiting of clementines delightedly.....

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 19:19:41
ShatnersBassoon Wed 28-Nov-12 19:23:50

Ooph, that's knocked the wind right out of my sails. I really thought I was doing well by giving cherry toms and cucumber with fair regularity.

FlorenceDaphne Wed 28-Nov-12 19:25:39

I had forgotten all about the vomited clementines! Thank you for reminding me.

BornToFolk Wed 28-Nov-12 19:26:13

Poncetastic! Love it!

I am slightly jealous, DS won't even let me put pasta salad in his lunchbox sad. I did get him to eat a falafel wrap today though and thought that poncey enough...clearly not...

A purple carrot. Because orage ones are simply not pretenious enough.

MmeLinDude Wed 28-Nov-12 19:29:03

oh, I do like a blogger who takes great poncy pics of kids lunches, and then muses on which wine would go with the snack.

AitchTwoOhOneTwo Wed 28-Nov-12 19:29:08

gosh. (actually none of it looks particularly appetising, am i wrong?)

Do you know what? I really thought it would look better than it does grin I feel better now.

They probably swap it for jam sandwiches and crisps at school

Panzee Wed 28-Nov-12 19:33:39

Do you think they eat any of it, or spend every lunchtime trading favours for Dairylea Lunchables?

WTAF is a green zebra tomato?

Panzee Wed 28-Nov-12 19:33:56

X post grin

ShatnersBassoon Wed 28-Nov-12 19:34:14

It does look a bit gloomy and joyless actually. A few Wotsits would liven things up a bit.

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 19:34:36

Ah, Shatner, get yourself in gear and oven-dry some heirloom tomaccios with rosemary and handpressed olive oil.

The cucumber's a lost cause.

I had to google soppressata.

Are there photos of these kids? I'm dying to see what they look like.

DameMargotFountain Wed 28-Nov-12 19:35:51

why are all the lunches laid out on a sheet of rusty tin?

I assumed it was the white slab in the box? Never heard of it.

MmeLinDude Wed 28-Nov-12 19:36:43

Well, the tapas one looks like it could do with a Gruene Veltiner, cause it is very dry looking.

The sweet pepper stew looks really boring. Although I am impressed that she gets her DC to eat so much veg and salad.

DS would eat the bread and yogurt. Nothing else.

ceeveebee Wed 28-Nov-12 19:36:57

I notice that their nanny helped them bake the pie, bet Amanda goes nowhere near the kitchen in real life

The olives do look nice but dd1 would complain very loudly if I only gave her 3 of the things! She would eat double of those portions.

I do want the olives that I can't spell, they look a lovely shade of green I bet they're yummy.

mignonette Wed 28-Nov-12 19:38:28

Is this Amanda Hesser's blog? If so it is her trade as such seeing as she was food editor of NY Times Magazine and has written/edited many food books.

Still up herself though -'Deconstructed Salad anyone?'

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 19:39:00

Wouldn't you just love to watch the kiddies march homeward with Ribena lips and stand in the street waiting for Mummy to break glass with the resulting screech?

I think some of them look lish but I agree, the joyless sterility gets a bit much.

Seriously, who gives a six year old ONE caramel, and waxes lyrical about the cellophane it's wrapped in?

MmeLinDude Wed 28-Nov-12 19:39:05

love the comment on this post

Amanda is the co founder of the blog. Wonder if her kids really eat these lunches, or if it is a cunning plan to get the blog shared by women going, 'OMG check out what these kids get for lunch'

Mintyy Wed 28-Nov-12 19:40:36


OscarPistoriusBitontheside Wed 28-Nov-12 19:41:51

I note she's from Brooklyn. So my guess is this: once high powered Manhattan Mommy now raising her twins creatively. I.e. jacked in her job, bored to tears whilst DH works on Wall Street and using ponce-tastic lunch blog to get her fix of "creative, I don't miss my work at all" needs met.


mignonette Wed 28-Nov-12 19:41:55

Yes, they are Amanda Hesser's kids. They're not going to be eating Cheese sandwiches and Ki Ora every day are they? KUA definitely....

hazeyjane Wed 28-Nov-12 19:42:13

ds had a deconstructed marmite sandwich for lunch, with a petit filous artfully schmeared on top - I wish I had taken a photo now, it was a dish of great beauty.

Pooka Wed 28-Nov-12 19:42:24

Why do first graders not have access to forks yet? Some of the stuff would be tricky eaten with what looks to be a teaspoon....

racingheart Wed 28-Nov-12 19:42:35

Put me out of my misery and explain soppressata please. Anyone?

Nono! Cucumber is allowed! Because remember, Walker loves cucumber! <feels better about self>

mignonette Wed 28-Nov-12 19:43:14

She's still high powered Oscar - a major player in the food and journalism world.

BornToFolk Wed 28-Nov-12 19:44:08

I do think it looks really tasty but DS would need some carbs with that pepper stew thing or he'd be starving by tea time.

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 19:44:19

I'd give her four seconds in the 8 till Late in town before she collapsed from actual life intolerance.

mignonette Wed 28-Nov-12 19:44:21

Soppressata is pretty common or garden Italian deli meat. Nothing special in Italy that's for sure....

OscarPistoriusBitontheside Wed 28-Nov-12 19:45:32

http://food52.com/blog/category/163_cooking_for_clara gringringringrin

She "happened to have a conversation with Addie" shock I wish I could just 'happen' to have a convo with dd. Our conversations never seem to stop. hmm

hazeyjane Wed 28-Nov-12 19:45:59

Is it like a more glamorous, but doleful pepperami?

meditrina Wed 28-Nov-12 19:46:50

Well, I thought a soppressa was an Italian nappy.

ginhag Wed 28-Nov-12 19:47:36

Yes hazeyjane, my children deconstruct their own lunches too, and in fact often use our kitchen for site specific performance art. We obviously have Truly Gifted Offspring.

mignonette Wed 28-Nov-12 19:47:40

It is dry Italian Salami, cured or uncured. Too much of that everyday and you'll end up with stomach cancer....sad

It is Pepperami with good Brooklyn PR

OscarPistoriusBitontheside Wed 28-Nov-12 19:48:00

Bugger, blows my theory out the water doesn't it? She still had waaaaay too much time on her hands though.

Tonight we had (waitrose) pie and handcut chips (i.e. i chopped potatoes up and fried them) with a side accompaniment of broccoli. Not
Broccoli for ever mind, just broccoli.

lmao "Red Leicester cheese"

those kids are going to be sooo spoilt

"Kids deserve to eat lots of watermelon when it's in season".....oh, is there a cutoff age?

fergoose Wed 28-Nov-12 19:51:07

I would love to take those kids to McDonald's.

ginhag Wed 28-Nov-12 19:51:25

And kitchens covered in food, toy cars and broken crayons.

I'm hoping if I study hard enough I will be smart enough to decode their amazingly postmodern take on the deceptively simple theme of 'food'.

hazeyjane Wed 28-Nov-12 19:52:24

ginhag, there is a photo on my profile of ds going through his Jackson Pollock phase, it was an angry time where he really expressed himself through food, challenging, but exciting times.

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 19:55:31

Laughing with gusto at 'doleful pepperami'.

Fair enough, she presumably has a reputation to uphold, but she needs a wee shake.

Presumably she feels she's reaching out to the real people by 'sandwichifying' (yes, that's the word she uses) her "Chicken Cutlets Grilled in Charmoula with Quick-Cured Lemon Confit" by dint of slapping some on sliced bread with kale salad.

You had me at sandwichify.

ginhag Wed 28-Nov-12 19:56:19

Hazey I have a photo somewhere of ds2 covered from the waist up in chocolate sauce, eating a small plastic toy whilst pouring juice on the floor. Afraid it's not on my profile as he is planning to use it in his thesis ;)

God I need WINE. I have snot in my hair. And it's not mine.

mignonette Wed 28-Nov-12 19:58:13

Hazey grin grin grin

Let's hope he never gets into Van Gogh and insists upon eating crispy pigs ears at St John Restaurant every day

MmeLinDude Wed 28-Nov-12 19:59:12

Bless. Those pics are cute. Can you imagine the chaos of the photo shoot though.

'Right. Got the bow in her hair. Be quick'


'Fuck, she moved. Nooooooooo, Clara. Don't take the bow out. Amanda, she's taking the bow out again'

'No, no Clara. We don't take the bow out of our hair when Rueben is taking cute photos, leave it in. Now take the spoon. No. Don't mush the yogurt into your hair. The spoon. That's it. NO, NOT TO HIT YOUR BROTHER'


'Amanda. She took the bow out again'.

'FUCK. Anyone got any superglue?'

DameMargotFountain Wed 28-Nov-12 19:59:57

i'm going to start a blog

'Margots' DDs lunch'

day 1 - deconstructed quiche and some strips of advocado

day 2 - cheese sarnies and grapes

day 3 - cheese sarnies and grapes

day 4 - cheese sarnies and grapes


Thank you for bringing this into my life...

LegArmpits Wed 28-Nov-12 20:05:40

I have visions of the kids being Black Eyed Children....

lmao Dame and Mme grin

I think if you took them to McDonalds they'd turn their noses up at the salads.

Strawhatpirate Wed 28-Nov-12 20:06:06

I want to air mail those kids some fruit shoots. I bet they would cause them to go apeshit and run amok in there posh manhatten prep school.

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 20:07:15

ginhag, I think you have typed the most perfect pair of sentences I've ever seen on MN in that last post.

"I have snot in my hair. And it's not mine."

My ribs hurt.

Are her children not starving? Or have I misunderstood the scale?

Fozzleyplum Wed 28-Nov-12 20:08:39

What a load of pretentious twaddle. Even if the children eat this (which frankly, I doubt), it would never be enough. My boys (both skinny and with quite small appetites) would have needed twice that quantity at that age.

TuftyFinch Wed 28-Nov-12 20:13:39

Looks like the leftovers my dad gives to the foxes.



fantashtic Wed 28-Nov-12 20:18:08

(says Amanda, "chicken and tarragon are besties").

scratches eyes out

Sunnywithachanceofshowers Wed 28-Nov-12 20:20:17

'carrots cooked forever'

Or, to give the dish its' proper name, mashed carrots.

Strawhatpirate Wed 28-Nov-12 20:23:19

Meanwhile in Soho Amanda's husband is eating McDonalds of a hookers boobs.

akaemmafrost Wed 28-Nov-12 20:24:01

Those kids eat A LOT of processed meat.

TheReturnOfBridezilla Wed 28-Nov-12 20:24:35

My DC would throw that little lot on her spotless kitchen floor. And then smear it in a bit. <sigh>

Chubfuddler Wed 28-Nov-12 20:26:07

That doesn't sound like anything near enough calories for a six year old. Or enough fat. Or enough carbs.

DowagersHump Wed 28-Nov-12 20:26:26

Did she not take the seeds out of the peppers before she made the pepper and squash stew???

Salt in those mashed carrots, while we're slagging constructively critiquing things

NotAnotherPackedLunch Wed 28-Nov-12 20:34:38

Losing the will to live after looking at that blog.
Is she for real?
Please tell me I'm not the only one who stuffs the same lunches into their lunch packs every day whilst grumpily calculating how long it will be until they can do it themselves.

snigger Wed 28-Nov-12 20:44:07

To be fair, my two don't have the deportment necessary to carry that kind of food any distance without producing something abstract-looking in their lunchbox.

I console myself with the knowledge that thinly sliced tomatoes cease to look like fishscales when they've gone through juvenile replication of a long spin cycle.

ginhag Wed 28-Nov-12 20:54:42

grin snigger. I'm all angry <--- but that is blushing. Charming blushing. Ignore the hair and the coco pops attached to my terribly chic jumper and I really do look charming. Honest like.

ginhag Wed 28-Nov-12 20:56:15

My dad used to give us peanut butter and lettuce sandwiches. 'Just for a change' confused

Sunnywithachanceofshowers Wed 28-Nov-12 21:17:19

My mum once sent me on a school trip with beefburger and tomato toasted sandwiches. Not so good cold, tho. <boak>

Why does she photograph the lunches in a bunker? confusedgrin

Pooka Wed 28-Nov-12 21:48:16

Because they have to live in a bunker lest the strength of their sautéed broccoli farts wipes out Greenwich village.

LynetteScavo Wed 28-Nov-12 21:59:28

(says Amanda, "chicken and tarragon are besties").

I am rolling my eyes.

TheCountessOlenska Wed 28-Nov-12 22:00:44

It all looks a bit depressing for some reason (maybe it's the bunker grin )

I dunno, I think kids food should be a bit more upbeat

You can't beat a mashed potato face with a sausage smile, pepper nose and round carrot eyes imo

LynetteScavo Wed 28-Nov-12 22:01:47

And if that was all my 6yo ate for lunch they'd quickly fade away. And I have skinny DC. Maybe Walker and Addie aren't very active.

DameMargotFountain Thu 29-Nov-12 09:23:35

<wondering if Sunny is my sister>

our lunch boxes were a sight to behold...toasted bacon sarnies DO NOT keep hot until lunchtime, even wrapped in foil <vomit>

I think it's great to get kids eating the same food as adults, but I don't know why she has to fuss so much over the lunches. Everyone else just grabs a PB sandwich or an apple!

My mum did salads in containers for a bit in Reception and then stopped.....too much fuss!

Though I did used to have pancakes in foil for pancake day grin leaking melted brown sugar allll over everything.....

pollycazalet Thu 29-Nov-12 09:33:10

We quite often have snacky tea here actually, as a treat in front of the tv. Ours tends to include doritos or walkers crisps and chunks of cheddar. We do include the "British cracker" though.

sununu Thu 29-Nov-12 09:35:03

Amanda's family here, for some reason I felt I HAD to see those twins too.

pollycazalet Thu 29-Nov-12 09:41:16

"babysitter"? Surely she means "nanny working an 11 hour day?"

Pooka Thu 29-Nov-12 11:19:25

Kids in the first pic look like Oliver twist style "please mom can I have some more butnotbloodysweetcornstewagain"

None of them look especially robust or hale and hearty.

TellMeLater Thu 29-Nov-12 11:46:39

Those lunch boxes look pretty similar to the ones I make for my dcs including the portion sizes and my kids are nearly 10! blush - I don't blog about it though.

NettoSpookerstar Thu 29-Nov-12 11:52:08

I love a bit of food poncery at times but by god I want to slap that woman round the face with a pack of Smartprice ham.

EverybodysSnowyEyed Thu 29-Nov-12 12:05:48

well good for her

but i have two negative comments

my 5 yr old has a very small appetite and even he would ask for seconds with those portions!

and they do eat a lot of processed meat - just because it has an italian name it doesn't mean it's healthy!

doyouwantfrieswiththat Thu 29-Nov-12 12:12:40

you people are the reason I love mumsnet.

I'm going to waddle down to KFC now & confess about it on the weight loss thread later blush those photos have made me crave additives.

I think that the "babysitter" is slipping those twins some extra calories on the sly, not that they aren't thin. Maybe the reason people in the US will eat Hersheys is that they are starved by blogging mothers and would eat anything.

Is that link serious or a joke, can't work it out.

"she has written cookbooks and memoirs, including Cooking for Mr. Latte about her adorable courtship with her husband. (Have you read it? I'd highly recommend it if you want a great, fun read this summer). "

adorable courtship? hmm

And she "balances it all" by having a babysitter look after them while she and her adorable hubby shower and dress? confused

"- What advice would you give to other moms about how to balance work and life?
- My advice would be to stop thinking about it as a gender issue. Think of it as a parent issue"

Given that most days she gets home at 9.30 pm, I think it's not a gender issue, more of a nanny issue!

She is extremely skinny, isn't she? Guess she doesn't believe in big portions.

NotQuintAtAllOhNo Thu 29-Nov-12 12:40:25

That does not look like good food. It looks like self important food, but not good and tasty and healthy food.

I hope the day will never come when I feed my kids one tomato, a couple of ricotta leaves, a piece of dry bread and an apple. <shiver> Thats like scrooge food.

StickEmWithThePointyEnd Thu 29-Nov-12 12:44:57

Is Amanda writing the blog? Why does she keep introducing herself like "Here's Amanda to explain..." We already know you're there Amanda, it's your blog. confused.

EverybodysSnowyEyed Thu 29-Nov-12 12:45:36

why does she insist on calling her nanny a babysitter? is it a US thing?

to me, a babysitter suggests an 18yr old gap year student, whereas hers sounds like she is a well qualified nanny

Songbird Thu 29-Nov-12 12:47:54

Oh God I love it! What the hell is a 'British cracker'? I've never seen a cracker like that!

SolidGoldYESBROKEMYSPACEBAR Thu 29-Nov-12 12:54:52

It makes me want to post up pics of a lunch box containing 20 B&H, a can of Stella and half a kebab and say 'Well this is what my kids get for lunch'

snigger Thu 29-Nov-12 13:55:33

Ah NotGoodNotBad, she can't be skinny, she specifically points out that working down't road from a doubtless artisanal painted to look like a dairy micromorsel-at-----a-----time 100% cocoa solids kinda chocolate keeps her, and I quote directly

"well fed and plump".

See, I'm uncomfortable bashing a gal for being successful and living like a bloke, as we should all have the right to do, but lunchbox one-up-manship to this degree is deserving of well fed and plump elbow to the ribs.

SGB - if you post that in comments, I will send you all the valuable things of the shop.

snigger Thu 29-Nov-12 13:57:17

chocolate shop, that should have read.

And Quint, I agree - those lunches are SPARSE, man, DD1 could have 90% of them flattened before the end of the drive.

FunnysInLaJardin Thu 29-Nov-12 14:00:13

wow fab poncetastic blog. My just turned 7 yo would refuse each and everyone of those lunchs of the basis of vegetables alone

TheLightPassenger Thu 29-Nov-12 14:07:53

to be fair Nicholas on that same blog group also favours the poncy approach to child nutrition - the world's smallest sweet potato salad and a burmese style hamburger biscuit

FunnysInLaJardin Thu 29-Nov-12 14:12:44

I am just imagining the scene in our house in the morning. It is NOT conducive to 30 mins of yoga and 'if the kids wake up they just crawl between our legs'. I am seriously lolling here.

Honestly though, nothing a half good deli can sell.

Hardly groundbreaking. And btw my dc would starve on such tiny portions. Thank goodness it is just school dinners here, at least they have a hot meal.

can't sell

greenhill Thu 29-Nov-12 14:21:42

Those lunches don't contain enough food for my 2 yo DS.
For lunch he had half a pint of cream of parsnip soup (homemade) and a ham sandwich on seeded bread, yesterday morning he ate 4 bananas between breakfast and lunch. Those 6 yo's must be tiny.

greenhill Thu 29-Nov-12 14:24:05

I used to eat poncetastic lunches like that when I worked next to Selfridges Food Hall...when I used to spend a fortune on food that never filled me!

MadBusLady Thu 29-Nov-12 14:30:05

Oh I love the seriousness of NYC internet circle jerkery. London has people like this too of course but they mostly know they have to at least pretend to be a bit self-deprecating at times. Takes all the fun out of it.

drjohnsonscat Thu 29-Nov-12 14:33:13

Laughing out loud at this from strawhatpirate:

Meanwhile in Soho Amanda's husband is eating McDonalds of a hookers boobs

Those kids don't each much do they? <goes off to poke own fat children>

snigger Thu 29-Nov-12 14:34:14

All those years ago when I watched Sex And The City and wondered why her friends never just kicked Carrie in the shins and ran away from her desperate self-obsession - those blogs and MadBusLady's post are pulling back the curtain for me....

MmeLindor Thu 29-Nov-12 15:45:25

LOL Netto (how the hell are you, btw) I have been looking for you on the XF threads

ethelb Thu 29-Nov-12 15:53:29

I thought it was a Bath Oliver

One of these: www.mysupermarket.co.uk/tesco-price-comparison/Crackers/Fortts_Original_Bath_Oliver_Biscuits_200g.html

Do they sell them as posh food over there then?

ethelb Thu 29-Nov-12 15:58:10

This is the best bit: "I picked up a piece of tuna at the Greenmarket and poached it in oil with garlic, thyme and sage -- and then made a "refrigerator" rice salad with it, adding bits of things I had hanging around. Jasmine rice, capers, pickled ramps, kalamata olives, celery, Russian red kale, and lemon juice"

I don't want to google what a ramp is and why you would pickle it. Does anyone know?

EverybodysSnowyEyed Thu 29-Nov-12 16:03:06

Or tHe bit about 'freekah' keeping you full for longer, maybe bigger portions would help with that!

NettoSpookerstar Thu 29-Nov-12 16:57:42

She's a bloody freekah.

Hey Mme, I'm OK, currently fighting the HA over moving and floors, but generally trotting along.
I've not done the X Factor threads this year, but still watching.

cheesesavory Thu 29-Nov-12 18:04:24

Iirc ramps are wild garlic.

Apparently If you cook, your family will eat dinner together unless you just nip home to see your children for one hour a couple of nights a week. I wouldn't judge if it wasn't for the hypocrisy.

Chubfuddler Thu 29-Nov-12 19:14:03

I got as far as her husband waking her for yoga while the slave babysitter arrives to watch the children and gave up. What a loon.

FunnysInLaJardin Thu 29-Nov-12 20:57:48

I was also lolling at Red Leicester. I used to live near Leicester and back then it and cheddar was all you could get. Now it's rocking up on poncey NY food blogs. My mum would be proud

FunnysInLaJardin Thu 29-Nov-12 21:00:49

she is soooo thin and her DC look ghostly, a bit like The Others with Nicole Kidman innit

Oh I missed that Funny. Leics family here too, eaten in massive slabs with Branston pickle throughout my childhood!

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