Goodbye to Mumsnet

(119 Posts)
dittany Thu 15-Sep-11 13:11:27

(Yet another great thing about Mumsnet is that there is actually a section especially devoted for flouncing off).

I didn't want to go without saying goodbye properly.

I just wanted to say what an amazing place Mumnset is and how much I've enjoyed posting and reading here and being part of it. I think it's a wonderful space for women to talk to one another and to support each other and just generally be able to be ourselves. The posters here are great and I think it's probably the best mainstream site there is by far. I've always felt like I know about a special secret coming to Mumnset because there are people (sexist people) who are bit sneery and superior at the name, and have no idea of the intelligent, witty and interesting conversations that go on here. More fool them of course. smile

And of course the Feminism Section. It says so much for Mumsnet that they were happy to give us a feminist section, which has turned into a place where feminism and radical feminism are addressed seriously and where posters have become active in real life and where real feminism is happening every day. It says so much for Mumsnet posters that so many of them are feminists, or were interested in feminism and want to engage. If Mumsnet is the best mainstream site, the Feminist section is probably the best public feminist forum there is (it's why we're getting trolled!). Standing up for women and girls is such an important thing to do. So of course Mumsnetters would do it.

I realise this reads like a bit of a speech (uber-flounce) but being part of Mumsnet has meant a lot to me (I spent enough time here to prove that) and I wanted to say why.

So so long, goodbye - I'll miss a lot of the posters here, I'll miss the feminist section, but it feels like the time is right to move on.

FootballFriend Thu 15-Sep-11 13:18:35

I don't quite get why you're going, but goodbye and you know where we are smile I hope to see you around again.

That's a shame. I always read the feminism section and you have really educated me about a lot of things.

It will be a shame not to have such a strong feminist voice about.

OmicronPersei8 Thu 15-Sep-11 13:22:10

Dittany, sorry to see you go. I've lurked on the feminism section (although not recently) and always found your posts thought-provoking and challenging, in the best possible way. Thank you for helping me re-awaken my brain. I don't know why you are leaving (I thought you'd only just come back!) but wish you all the best.

VelvetSnow Thu 15-Sep-11 13:22:37

are you going because of the thread police grin

allhailtheaubergine Thu 15-Sep-11 13:24:01

Sorry you're leaving. I liked your posts and learnt a lot. Mumsnet will be poorer without you.

DontCallMeFrothyDragon Thu 15-Sep-11 13:24:56

I will miss you. Feel free to drop in from time to time, and we'll keep up the fight.

In the meantime, don't let the eejits keep you down.

Take care x

I'm wishing you all the best - take care, and I hope you won't be gone forever. Thank you so much for all the advice - especially on my recent computer thread. I hope you know how helpful and supportive I found your comments. And thanks for all the interesting discussion (the mental health thread was amazing and fascinating). Best of luck!

rushofbloodtothefeet Thu 15-Sep-11 13:26:20

Dittany, I've always admired your forthright voice, even if I haven't always agreed with it. MN will be a poorer place with out you.

parentfailure Thu 15-Sep-11 13:27:02


I have no clue why you are going and I know you won't recognise my name, but you have helped me SOOO much in the past.

You have alot of wise words. x

nickschick Thu 15-Sep-11 13:27:40

Why are you going then??

Quintessentialist Thu 15-Sep-11 13:30:44

oh boy.

I will be sorry to see you go, Dittany. I never read the feminist section. But I enjoy reading your posts in Relationship. You are sometimes very wise.

adamschic Thu 15-Sep-11 13:32:13

Sorry you are going but I think I understand why. I agree with you about the special secret. Such a shame your favourite section was trolled. Hope you find a new home somewhere on the internet.

Tyr Thu 15-Sep-11 13:33:46


Speaking as someone who has had a number of spats with you, I hope you reconsider for two main reasons:
(1) While I consider some of your views to be misguided (just my opinion) I think they need to be heard and debated.
(2) I think you genuinely care for others, such as the teenage girl with the dummy.
Strange as it may sound coming from me, I hope you stick around; if you don't, I wish you all the best for the future.

JeremyVile Thu 15-Sep-11 13:33:46

I don't contribute much to the feminism section, there are others far more eloquent than me and I enjoy reading their posts.

I am really gutted you are going Dittany, without overstating it, you are one of the very best things about mn. Truly, I find you very inspirational, very interesting and it makes me a bit happier knowing that there are people like you about.

I used to always jump in when I felt someone was being picked on but I tend not to do that now for my own sanity, also im here infrequently and often avoid threads that may irritate me so probably miss the majority of it but if you change your mind I, for one, promise to stand up for you when these knob-heads are having their little games (for what it's worth!)

Beachcomber Thu 15-Sep-11 13:34:37

I really really wish that you wouldn't go dittany.

I know that it isn't your responsibility to stay just because the FeMNists want you to, but I wish you would.

I'm feeling pretty disappointed with MN as a whole frankly that it has come to this. We were lucky to have you for as long as we did I guess.

Don't go.

WakeMeUpWhenSeptemberEnds Thu 15-Sep-11 13:36:20

I will tell you what I tell my teenage daughter - stop hearing ONLY the negative comments. I can see exactly what you are saying about being targetted, singled out and attracting disproportionate negative attention. (would it be inappropriate to say something like 'just because people think you are paranoid doesn't mean they dont hate you anyway - bleurgh crap at online humour. I bet that comes across wrong).


From where I sit, you also attract a helluvalorra positive attention and support. And that's without the lurking contingent.

Best wishes you to always and in everything you do x

adamschic Thu 15-Sep-11 13:37:54

Thinking about it if you do go then the trolls have won which is a real shame. I only lurk on the feminist section and was forgetting about your contributions to relationship section. Don't go.

I don't think that's a fair thing to say, adamschic. I know you don't mean it badly, but it's not fair on dittany to make her feel it's her job to engage with the trolls or magic them away. It's HQs job, and they haven't done it.

Blackduck Thu 15-Sep-11 13:39:45

Hi Dittany, it's a sad day when people like you who are strong and confident feel hounded off of a board. I haven't always agreed with what you have said, but you have certainly made me (and others) think. The feminist section will be a poorer place without you.

ColdTruth Thu 15-Sep-11 13:40:14


edd1337 Thu 15-Sep-11 13:40:43

LRD. Trolls that were on there yesterday were dealt with. They are doing their job

ColdSancerre Thu 15-Sep-11 13:41:01

I'm very sorry you're leaving dittany and think it is awful if it's because of the trolling.

dittany Thu 15-Sep-11 13:50:45

"just because people think you are paranoid doesn't mean they dont hate you anyway"

hahahahaha, brilliant

Thanks all for being so nice. I do think it's the right time for me to go. I'm so happy if stuff I said was useful to people. My basic approach has always to be to say the stuff that I wanted to hear, but no-one else was saying. It seems to create fireworks some of the time!

But seriously bashing goes with the territory I've been in, and even with the support, or being part of a group of people agreeing, the bashing has just got too much. Also I reckon I've been a bit of a lightening rod, for various reasons, and I don't think that's always necessarily useful. I don't think it is now for the Feminist Section. It shouldn't be dominated by personalities or what look like personalities, or complaints about certain personalities and defenses of the same. That's just tiresome for everybody.

RumourOfAHurricane Thu 15-Sep-11 13:55:24

Message withdrawn

DontCallMeFrothyDragon Thu 15-Sep-11 13:58:28

<ties dittany's shoelaces to the chair>

HA! You're stuck here... grin

HereBeBolloX Thu 15-Sep-11 14:00:50

Dittany I hope it won't be forever. We will miss you and your clarity and I hope that once you've had a good long break, you'll come back.

PrincessFiorimonde Thu 15-Sep-11 14:02:42

Dittany, I'm very sorry to see you go. You are one of the first posters I saw (in Relationships) when I first starting using MN a couple of years ago. I haven't 'spoken' with you directly, but have found many of your posts - especially in Feminism, of course - interesting, thought-provoking, challenging (in a good way).

I wish you well.

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls Thu 15-Sep-11 14:03:42

Dittany - you flounced and then came back to respond! How is that flouncing? Get your arse back here right now grin

BalloonSlayer Thu 15-Sep-11 14:05:29

oh nooooo

Don't go.

I am a fledgling and often find myself thinking "now what would Dittany do?" grin

Would be sad if you were not here.

ShirelyKnotSHIRE Thu 15-Sep-11 14:05:47

Don't go

HereBeBolloX Thu 15-Sep-11 14:06:37

LOL at "what would Dittany do?"

ShowMeTheMonet Thu 15-Sep-11 14:06:56

I understand why you're going but I think it's a real shame. A real shame.

adamschic Thu 15-Sep-11 14:08:14

LRD, you are right I didn't mean it badly, it's shame though but I can understand Dittany, it's just not worth it.

There are some strange, sad people out there.

Beachcomber Thu 15-Sep-11 14:10:20

Dittany are you going because you think there will be fewer trolls/less derailment if you do? I mean are you taking one for the team?

Or have you just have enough and want to post some place else?

If it is the latter that is fair enough on your part.

If is the former well, fuck that for a game of soldiers. We may well have less bullshit but it won't be worth it.

The way to sort out the current situation is for MNHQ to get their act together and do something to protect the feminist board - ALL feminist boards on the net need some sort of protection because they attract all sorts of low lives by their very nature. MNHQ is being very naive if they think that they are somehow different. They agreed to a feminist space now they need to accept that unfortunately in this shitey old patriarchal world of ours, feminist spaces are attacked and there are generally specific rules about what is and is not acceptable.

Don't go.

ComradeJing Thu 15-Sep-11 14:12:35

Best wishes Dittany, I've learned a lot from you. It's a shame MNHQ aren't on the trolls and I hope you pop back in the future.

Pan Thu 15-Sep-11 14:12:43

oh FFS.

Whatever the reason(s) you are going, I will organise a rota to keep your seat warm until you come back.

MarginallyNarkyPuffin Thu 15-Sep-11 14:13:41

If you feel you need to go I understand. You can pop back from time to time though.

I think that you have become a target for trolls who must be searching for posts in your name. More upsetting are the MNers who don't bother to actually read your comments or explore the thread topics so much as selectively quote you to tell you why you're wrong about everything.

I don't always agree exactly with what you say, but you always make me question my beliefs and re-evaluate the way I see things. You people think. That's the highest praise I can give.

MarginallyNarkyPuffin Thu 15-Sep-11 14:14:06

You make people think.

HereBeBolloX Thu 15-Sep-11 14:14:29

This is very true Beachcomber.

Mysogynist men are absolutely terrified of spaces like mumsnet, because they give women the opportunity to talk to each other, share experiences and support each other. The idea that nasty old feminists might be influencing "decent" women to have strange uppity ideas, is really threatening to them, whcih is why they're all over this space and MN seems to be in denial that they are of a different flavour to your average common or garden troll. It just won't work and it will destroy the space they've created.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 15-Sep-11 14:22:29

Its an awful shame if you feel hounded out. I occasionally drop into Feminist board ... reported a bridge-dweller last night even, MN deleted post then whole thread about as quickly as could be expected, late at night. You talk a lot of clear sense.

No chance you could namechange and stay?

mumwithdice Thu 15-Sep-11 14:25:52

I wish you weren't going, dittany. I always enjoy reading your posts even if I don't agree because, as Puffin says, they make me think. But I also understand why and I wish you the best.

ShirelyKnotSHIRE Thu 15-Sep-11 14:27:42

Totally agree with "ALL feminist boards on the net need some sort of protection because they attract all sorts of low lives by their very nature. MNHQ is being very naive if they think that they are somehow different."

PLEASE listen to this MNHQ

EldritchCleavage Thu 15-Sep-11 14:30:03

It's been an education. It's a real pity you are leaving and I will miss your contributions. Feel free to slope back on after a while with another name.

dittany Thu 15-Sep-11 14:34:52

"More upsetting are the MNers who don't bother to actually read your comments or explore the thread topics so much as selectively quote you to tell you why you're wrong about everything."


Beach I'm not taking one for the team. I'd actually be taking one if I stayed I think. I'm really sorry to be leaving Mumsnet Feminist Section one radical feminist down, and it is a selfish decision at the end. I am hoping that the lack of lightening-rodness may be a side benefit of me not being around. But I know I'd hate it if any of the feminists or the people who've been supportive of feminism here left, so I'm sorry that it's me that's doing it.

SweetTheSting Thu 15-Sep-11 14:35:39

What lots of people have said. I lurk a lot more than I post and I don't always agree with you but I think you have a real clarity that will be missed and I'm sad that you are being personally hounded in this way.

I hope you feel able to return in future.

jugglingwiththreeshoes Thu 15-Sep-11 14:39:37

When I see a "dittany" post it always conjures up a cool, wise, edgy vibe.
( I don't always remember exactly who's said what to whom too much wine )
I'm sorry you're going.
Remember you could always flounce back and be very welcome.
Glad our paths crossed for a while, if only in cyberspace xx

Thumbwitch Thu 15-Sep-11 14:44:38

Dittany, while I don't always agree with your hardline stance on feminist issues, I do think you have been a very valuable poster and am sorry that you feel the need to leave. sad

Lightning-rod or not, you stood up for what you believed in and vociferously - something that someone needs to do. Others may take your place but certainly yours is the best known feminist poster name to me on here and I will miss you.

Hope you decide to come back.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 15-Sep-11 14:46:21

'ALL feminist boards on the net need some sort of protection'

What sort of protection do you mean though? Make this the one moderated board, or what? I'd love there to be a way to cut malicious trolls off at the knee but I'm a bit baffled as to what MNHQ can do.

Peachy Thu 15-Sep-11 14:47:44

Ggodbye Dittant and good luck; whilst we have not always agreed (though not always disagreed either) it's been a pleasure to meet a fellow campaiger, even if in a different field (mostly).

Best of luck.

Beachcomber Thu 15-Sep-11 14:50:20

I hear you dittany. Fair enough. Keep in touch.

If we get our arses in gear and ask MNHQ to sort things out, would you consider coming back? (If we get them sorted I mean) You don't have to answer that.

Beachcomber Thu 15-Sep-11 14:54:33

We just need common or garden posting guidelines.

Stuff like making jokes about rape (offensive sexism) or calling feminists man haters (personal attack done in a cunning group attack way) are not acceptable.

People will report stuff that goes against the guidelines and people who consistently break them will be warned and then banned or at least told to refrain from posting in feminism.

It isn't difficult.

So sorry you're going, dittany.

I don't blame you.

But MN and the Feminism section in particular will be the poorer for it.

Jux Thu 15-Sep-11 14:58:25

Dittany, I don't hang out on the feminist section, but I've seen you many times on Relationships. I don't always agree with you either but that doesn't mean I'm not sorry you're off. I do understand why you're doing this and tbh the events of the last week (?) have been very troubling.

I'm sorry you're off, and I hope you return soon; but my best wishes go with you.

Oh. Sorry you're going, Dittany. I'll miss your posts.

HereBeBolloX Thu 15-Sep-11 15:01:11

Yes I am yet to understand why racism, homophobia etc. are not allowed, but sexism is.

I asked that question and no one has answered it.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 15-Sep-11 15:03:02

Beachcomber - yes, I guess the posting guidelines could do with some beefing up - currently 'we will remove posts we consider to be obscene, racist, disablist, homophobic, contain personal attacks or break the law, once they are brought to our attention.' - doesn't cover offensive/discriminatory sexism.

DontCallMeFrothyDragon Thu 15-Sep-11 15:03:31

It's because we're just women., HereBeBollox.. we got the vote... what more do we want, eh? hmm

Thumbwitch Thu 15-Sep-11 15:04:25

Sexism and disablism, Herebe.

Peachy Thu 15-Sep-11 15:06:07

Quite Thumb.

Maybe MNHQ should, if they ahve not done so, seriously think about attedning some training on hate speech and discrimination? hal;f their policy is arse over tit wrt that; deleting attacks on individuals over groups is the reverse of their legal obs.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 15-Sep-11 15:06:15

It may be that guidelines on sexism have to be somewhat carefully thought out because there are probably a fair few posts which could be jumped on as anti-male sexism - I don't mean in feminism particularly - some of the jokey threads could be accused of being sexist by shitstirrers.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 15-Sep-11 15:08:18

>Sexism and disablism, Herebe.

'disablist' is verboten now.

bucaneve Thu 15-Sep-11 15:12:59

Such a shame you're going dittany, I really enjoyed reading all your posts in the feminist bit, even if I didn't always agree. I can tell from your posts that you really care about what you are saying. Hopefully you'll come back one day

Thumbwitch Thu 15-Sep-11 15:18:20

Grimma - what do you mean? the term "disablism" is wrong, or that disablism itself is forbidden? I was using the term as it has been used a lot recently (last few days) - wasn't aware that it was wrong?

GrimmaTheNome Thu 15-Sep-11 15:21:45

Thumb - I meant that disablism is now included in posts which will be deleted, which is as it should be!

''we will remove posts we consider to be obscene, racist, disablist, homophobic"

Thumbwitch Thu 15-Sep-11 15:23:37

oh goody! thanks for pointing that out. About time too - I feel all fucknuggety about that smile. (apologies for "in joke" blush)

ViolaTricolor Thu 15-Sep-11 15:29:02

Dittany, although we haven't directly interacted I've always been hugely grateful for the clear-sighted, strong voice with which you speak out for women and girls and for all the things they deserve -- many of those things very small and ordinary, yet out of reach. Good luck to you.

nickelbabe Thu 15-Sep-11 15:32:53

dittany, you can't leave!

i loooooove you really!

In all seriousness - i wish you weren't leaving, because I like debating with you.

Peachy Thu 15-Sep-11 15:33:58

That happend quite a while ago actually; took a lot of SN matter raising to get it, some could argue the effects has been minimal, although there is hope that last weekend might have some effects, given the loss of Fanjo etc.

And yes sexism should be included- although would it not be betetr better to ask that people fulfil their obligations under the hate speech was? Would cover all and just remind people it's illegal.

But getting deja vue feeling so off to harvest apples LOL

StewieGriffinsMom Thu 15-Sep-11 15:36:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Goodbye it is then. Thanks for all the insight.
I would second the motion that your reconsider the namechange option in a while; but would far rather you do what's best for you.

I also think the MN guidelines are Not Good Enough anymore. A serious revision is needed in the light of what happens on the Feminist board (and the SN one I understand).

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StayFrosty Thu 15-Sep-11 16:56:10

I think this is a huge shame, although i understand why. I have been very underwhelmed with mnhq's efforts to deal with the concerted trolling lately.

QOD Thu 15-Sep-11 16:57:03

ffs! I must miss so much! lots of leaving sad

is it me?

<<sniffs arm pitts>>

ForYourDreamsAreChina Thu 15-Sep-11 17:01:48

I'm a namechanger, and have been withdrawing from MN slowly myself over the last couple of months.... (hence the namechanging)just wanted to join in wishing Dittany well, as with a few others, she is one of the posters I want to be like when I grow up.

I will miss you too. Hurry back.

Right on sister (or something) grin

Meglet Thu 15-Sep-11 17:05:36


You were the only voice of reason on here sometimes <<weeps and bangs head on laptop>>

Those bloody thick-as-shit trolls on the feminism boards do my head in. Don't blame you for getting pissed off with it all.

SinicalSal Thu 15-Sep-11 17:10:15

Noooooo, ffs.
This is desperate.

So sorry to see you go. Hope you come back someday, but you must do what's best for yourself.

Why won't the fuckers go, not the valuable people. <shakes fist at sky>

SybilBeddows Thu 15-Sep-11 17:58:45

IF you stay, Dittany (I live in hope) it is probably about time for a namechange anyway, given the issues with people following you around to be rude to you.

handsomeharry Thu 15-Sep-11 18:02:03

I am very sorry to see you go. I lurk on the feminism threads and think you are amazing! I hope you will reconsider.

caramelwaffle Thu 15-Sep-11 18:07:52

Don't go, Dittany.

That's all.

caramelwaffle Thu 15-Sep-11 18:09:42

Actually. That's not all.

You help make people think. Really think (which of course changes lives).

AliceWyrld Thu 15-Sep-11 18:11:25

Dittany, so sad to see you go. You are such an inspirational woman. You lit a fire under my feminism and taught me so much that I am so very grateful for. And I frequently do the 'what would Dittany do?', and will continue to do so. Thank you so very much.

sad that Dittany is going.

Hope she comes back.

I always used to start off by reading her posts by thinking "noooo, that's too extreme" then find I couldn't disagree with her by the time I'd got to the end.

forkful Thu 15-Sep-11 18:29:47

dittany your posts have rippled far and wide

am sad you are going

DontCallMeFrothyDragon Thu 15-Sep-11 18:32:11

socialhandgrenade, I suspect that's the case with many of us. I remember I got half way through a post on one thread, then deleted it because, after what dittany had said, I couldn't make my mind up what I bloody thought. I'm not sure I identify entirely as a radical feminist, but I definitely have the seeds of radicalism planted. And that's something I owe to dittany and Sakura.

UMS, could you please wish dittany all the best from me, and thank her for changing the way I view this world. I feel more alive these days.

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 15-Sep-11 18:39:35

So sad about this. And angry with the fucking trolling twats who are making things so unpleasant for much loved posters.

Dittany, I will miss you so much sad

twotesttickles Thu 15-Sep-11 18:44:16

In my previous incarnation I appreciated your posts Dittany and I wish you well if you do decide to go. Or you could do as I did ditch the well known screen name, come back and start again and see if you get a better reception wink

startAfire Thu 15-Sep-11 19:06:45

Message withdrawn

Ditanny, I'm more of a lurker than a regular poster in the feminism section. though I've always called myself a feminist, some things you've written have left me shocked and open mouthed or shouting with disagreement. then I go away and think about it, and often find myself understanding or moving towards your viewpoint. (not always mind, you remain controversial grin). I have also admired how you always (as far as I have seen) passionately and strongly stand up for any woman subjected to or at risk of male violence. you put your money where your mouth is, as it were.

so thank you, for opening up my mind to new perspectives on things about which I thought I already knew what I thought. perhaps you will pop back after a breather? :hopeful:

maresedotes Thu 15-Sep-11 19:22:59

MamaChocoholic has just said what I wanted to say so thank you to her. Dittany, come back soon - I always enjoy reading your posts.

MinnieBar Thu 15-Sep-11 19:31:09

Goodbye - for now - really hoping you come back after some time away.

(another lurker in feminism)

When I see 'Dittany" I think RUN ....

I am a Stepmother


Actually to be fair I have always admired your enormous balls, Dittany, hope you find peace wherever you are smile

ScarlettIsWalking Thu 15-Sep-11 19:42:43

Dittany your posts changed my views and perceptions. I feel so much richer and have sincerely learnt so much from you.

It seriously sucks that you have to go.

LurcioLovesFrankie Thu 15-Sep-11 21:21:18

Another lurker on the feminist section here. I am so sorry to see you go. You have made me rethink so many things, and though I don't always agree, I always find your arguments challenge my preconceptions in ways that really enrich how I think about feminism.

Pan Thu 15-Sep-11 21:29:33

Can I direct posters to another thread in the FS regarding dittany's departure?

I am shit at linkies.


MrsChemist Thu 15-Sep-11 21:43:41

Sorry you're going Dittany sad

I'll miss reading your posts and going from, "what? that's ridiculous," to "oh wow, she's totally right."

Hassled Thu 15-Sep-11 21:44:45

What MamaChocolic said. For every poster you think you're responding to, there are a ton of us reading and thinking and learning. Please don't let the fuckers get you down.

And thank you - thank you for teaching me a lot, and challenging me, and making me think and making me talk about feminism properly with my DD and my sons. You've been very important to MN.

MHQuestion Thu 15-Sep-11 21:45:21

MamaChocoholic said exactly what I wanted to say. Your posts have helped me enormously Dittany, thank you xx

flippinada Thu 15-Sep-11 21:46:33

I'm really sorry you're going Dittany - you will be missed and I hope you will come back.

PrincessFiorimonde Thu 15-Sep-11 21:53:59
Pigglesworth Fri 16-Sep-11 00:51:02

Dittany, you posted advice for me once when I was using a name change - your advice was surprising and thought-provoking, encouraging me to view my situation in a different/ confronting light - but ultimately I think you were right. Your support then was greatly valued.

You have played an important role in "raising people's consciousness", even though you sometimes provoke others' ire/ contempt in taking your hardline stance. I think you should do whatever is best for you. Thank you so much for your advice in the past and for offering what is often a very different, but valid, perspective - and all the best.

Portofino Fri 16-Sep-11 08:19:36

I too will miss you, Dittany. We haven't always seen eye to eye and have many run ins over the years. But when I finally engaged my brain and listened to what you were saying, well I have to say that it has completely changed my attitude. I have learnt a lot from you - thank you!

sunshineandbooks Fri 16-Sep-11 09:57:22

sad You will be very much missed dittany. Your posts here have often been challenging but never less than inspirational and I have learned a lot from you. I wish you well in the future.

Lio Fri 16-Sep-11 13:18:14

In case you're still checking in Dittany, thank you so much. I know I only post once in a blue moon, but I read A LOT and your posts have been formative in enabling me to speak up in RL when sexist crap is spoken in my hearing.

EllieG Fri 16-Sep-11 13:21:32

Oh. That's a bit sad, I really learned a lot from dittany's posts. Hope all OK and thanks to you.

madhairday Fri 16-Sep-11 15:04:09

I'm sad you're going, dittany. We've had a couple of fiery and stimulating discussions and I have a lot of admiration for you.

NormaStanleyFletcher Fri 16-Sep-11 15:12:04

Like others, I hope that this will be a break rather than a final goodbye. Your support in the relationships threads and thought provoking posts in the feminism threads will be sorely missed.

msrisotto Fri 16-Sep-11 17:19:35

Oh fuck it. sad

Come back after a namechange. I demands it.

Prolesworth Fri 16-Sep-11 18:42:51

Message withdrawn

SheCutOffTheirTails Fri 16-Sep-11 19:49:00

Goodbye dittany, I can't imagine that you would do this lightly, so I'm taking you at your word.


I'm terribly, terribly sad to hear that you're going.

You are out and out my favourite poster on MN and have been for years. I almost always agree with you, and when I don't I often change my opinion based on your arguments.

Best of luck wherever you end up, they are lucky to have you.

MN will be very much the poorer for your loss sad

petisa Fri 16-Sep-11 21:09:51

Don't go we need you! Wish you all the best though.

noncuro Sat 17-Sep-11 00:29:04

I really enjoyed your posts dittany. They always challenged my way of thinking. I hope the troll situation gets sorted out, but more importantly, I wish you good luck away from MN.

neepsntatties Sat 17-Sep-11 17:20:37

Gutted to find out you have left. I only recently engaged with feminism and your posts have been a key part of that process. You also helped me with a personal issue in a way that was life changing and I can't thank you enough for that.

Only just seen this. I wish you weren't going Dittany.

I remember being on this board when I first joined and thinking you were extreme and that I couldn't agree with anything you said. Now I only see the sense in what you right and I couldn't agree more. You, along with many other regulars on the feminist section, have helped clarify for me what I want for myself, my daughter and women everywhere and that there's nothing extreme about wanting to be treated with equality and respect.

You'll be missed. I truly mean that.

ChippingIn Sat 17-Sep-11 17:32:16

Dittany - I hope you can now read these posts and can see how much you'll be missed by a wide variety of people!

It's a shame the trolling/MNers who just see a name and react have spoilt MN for you. As you can see a lot of people got a lot from your posts. It's a shame that you perhaphs didn't get the support you needed, when you needed it?!

I don't agree with much of what you say, but I defend your right to say it without being 'picked on'.

I hope you will come back - MN is losing far too many 'good posters'.

MarshaBrady Sat 17-Sep-11 17:33:40

Dittany I really hope a break is a good one. And that you feel you can come back. Your insight is valuable.

GothAnneGeddes Mon 19-Sep-11 02:11:31

Boooo! Just Boo! A real, real shame, but I wish you well.

baskingseals Sun 09-Oct-11 13:59:45


you are probably the most inspirational person i have ever not met.

your words stick in my mind and have changed the way i think.

stay free

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