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Not Driving Away!

(473 Posts)
Pumble Sat 13-Jul-13 14:21:09

P1 splashing in the paddling pool and P2 having a nap. So pleased to be back and they are so pleased to be with each other again.

Can't believe we got to 1000 posts! You need to change your nn now too don't you wylye ?!

magimedi Sat 13-Jul-13 16:29:49

If you change your name, Wylye will you tell us? grin

It's great to hear you sounding so happy, Pumble.

Wylye Sat 13-Jul-13 19:02:29

Yay, found you! Paddling pools all round! grin

Now I've got to think of one haven't I.... Hmmmmmm, what shall I be.......

LittleBearPad Sat 13-Jul-13 19:07:11

I wish I was in a paddling pool! Not in the UK at the moment and it was 35 degrees today!

Glad you're home and Pumblette 1 is having fun and Pumblette 2 is recovering.

DameDeepRedBetty Sun 14-Jul-13 10:06:13

<checking in to new thread>

Mine are at a paintball party all day today. They're big scary teenagers now, and ten of them are currently hiding behind bushes and splattering each other somewhere near Cirencester. They have to wear trousers and long sleeves, and I'm baking already indoors in shorts and a vest. The birthday girl's mum managed to get it at a silly price on Groupon or Wowcher or something like that, and booked for the whole day, but I think they'll be home after lunch. At least I hope so! DTD1 doesn't really 'do' heat very well.

So pleased pumblette 2 all better, or mostly better anyway. Dnephew2 has had something rather similar, but being a bit older has not had to be admitted. He has now transferred it to his mother and father who are now confined to the house in a state of misery.

magimedi Mon 15-Jul-13 09:36:22

How is Pumblette 2 today? Hope all is well & you are managing to keep cool.

LongTailedTit Mon 15-Jul-13 13:33:30

cough cough ahem 'Tis I, Le Clerc....

LongTailedTit Mon 15-Jul-13 20:32:51

So Pumble, how's P2 doing? I hope she's all recovered, tho in this heat I imagine her rash may be hanging around.
I hope you've been enjoying yourselves back together at home again.

I had a bit of a shit day, we had DSs intro to the preschool he starts in September. Put it this way, I really hope first impressions don't last!
All improved when DH got home, he made DS laugh like a loon, cheered us all up! smile

Pumble Mon 15-Jul-13 21:39:42

Sorry you've had a shit day LTT (still have wylye in my head!) but glad it ended with laughter - always the best way. First days are bound to be difficult... It might take him a while to get used to it, but I think that's the case for most children isn't it? Hope you both get to enjoy the sunshine again tomorrow. Have you got another session soon to see how he is again?

P2 still not 100% but SO much better. It's just so good to be back at home with both my girls again. Unfortunately mr P and I are having a bad few days though but maybe it's the stress of last week is catching up with us.

magimedi Mon 15-Jul-13 22:25:51

Unfortunately mr P and I are having a bad few days though but maybe it's the stress of last week is catching up with us.

There's no "maybe" about that, Pumble, it's a definite.

You've just had such a shit week - bound to be some fall out somewhere. Just try to get back to a vague sort of routine with each other.

Sorry you've had a shit day, LTT - hope things get better tomorrow.

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 15-Jul-13 22:41:08

Hi all. Wow, what a lot you have gone through in the space of a week. I go on holiday and you have a horrible week. So glad to hear you are all back home. You must all still be shattered from the roller coaster you've been on. Can you and Mr P have a hour together while someone sits with the Pumbles?

Hope LTT has a better day too. Don't worry about pre school, come September, he will soon be loving it.

Ps, gladifoundthe new thread too!

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 15-Jul-13 22:42:28

Ps, absolutely agree with Magic too, it's fallout.

LongTailedTit Tue 16-Jul-13 01:00:03

I'm sorry you and MrP are having a tough time, but agree its probably the buildup of stress and emotion from last week. Hopefully it'll all blow over soon.

DS upset my friend's DS who's going to start at the same time, hair pulling and kicking him, just because they got too close, it's a bloody nightmare. I've now already had chats with the staff about how to 'deal with' him in Sept, and all the other parents saw me stressing out. blush
I nearly changed my NN to ChinookParent because I've gone beyond helicopter parenting to a new level!
Sorry Pumble, just needed to get that out. xx

Pumble Tue 16-Jul-13 21:33:52

LTT Don't worry about the other parents - they will have forgotten about it by September. It's not a nightmare - September is a long way away - who knows how DS will be then. And, he doesn't kick or pull everyone's hair does he, and once he's more comfortable there he will relax too. Deep breaths - it will all be ok. Hope you had a good day today. And never say sorry for getting anything out! (Incidentally I do like chinookparent!)

P2 continues to improve, although she has the odd moment to remind me that she's still not 100% and something still hurts! I'm just so pleased it's dry (although possibly a little too hot!) so they can tire themselves out at P1 can be tired out at home. A good job too as I went down to the village today to get some shopping, we walked all the way home and I realised I had left my shopping so we had to go all the way back....P1 was not impressed!!

I'm being really horrible to Mr P - I'm trying very hard to be nice, but I'm just not managing it....

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 16-Jul-13 21:43:39

Agree that September is a long time away, the other parents won't be thinking of it at all and will have seen it all before, with their own of other children. Pumble is right, once DS gets to know his surroundings and relaxes you will love preschool as much as he will.

Glad P2 is improving and you are making the most of the outdoors. Your last comment made me sad, but you have to remember,

- It is very hot, virtually everyone is grumpy and snappy from lack of sleep, it is not just you
- you have been churned up worrying about P2, worrying what p1 makes of it all, worrying about how you will do it all. From your posts, you got through it brilliantly, but now is catch up time.

Keep trying, this time will pass. Keep remembering the tricks that help, if you are like me and cranky in the heat, or when you're tired or hungry, then go to bed early, eat well, and hide in the shade as much as you can. Try and get a snippet of me time, even just half an hour, I am evil to DH if I don't get even a little me time for a few weeks.

It will get better.

LongTailedTit Tue 16-Jul-13 22:44:03

Thank you ladies! I'm sure all will improve when he gets more verbal, I just had a low day.

Glad P2 is still improving, I hope they're both sleeping well after the long walk!
This time next week all will be different again, really it will. xxxx

magimedi Wed 17-Jul-13 10:40:47

Pumble, have you & Mr P been out together without the Pumblettes since P2 was born?

Even if you can just go up the road for a coffee/drink/walk for an hour it might help.

And you have to put a ban on talking about the Pumblettes!

Longtailed - I too am sure that no one will remember your DS's behaivour. I don't think I knew a small one who hadn't done that at some time or other. He'll be 2 months older by then & that's a lot at that age.

Keep cool - I've just finished cleaning the kitchen as it was getting beyond a joke & am going to do nothing else all day!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 17-Jul-13 19:03:07

Keep cool. I'm off for my first craft night (knitting) with friends. I am not sure how wise it is to introduce wine to the equation, but I am looking forward to catching up with the girls.

Pumble, unless you are a closet knitter, maybe there are sme people round by you who would have an evening of crafts and chat. You could do the bobble hats you were talking about!!

Thanks for the tip on the new thread, glad to have found you all again.

Blimey it's hot....that's pretty much all I can think at the moment.

Pumble Thu 18-Jul-13 21:41:00

It's too hot....!

Thanks for all the advice re Mr P... We haven't been out together for I don't know how long and to be honest, I could really do with five minutes without the pumblettes! But, not five minutes without the pumblettes so that I can tidy the house, catch up on the ironing etc but five minutes just for me - I know that sounds incredibly selfish but it would be nice! We are bumbling along ok but it's like it just all feels a little tense if that makes sense?

I'm very jealous of your craft night rowrow I would love one of those to go to. I have so far knitted four hats for the girls (but can't work out how to sew them up) and have done the main bits for a cardigan for P1 and almost the same amount for a cardigan for P2 but can't work out how to do the boarders yet - it's like a foreign language!!

Been out and about with the pumblettes the last couple of days and probably have been making P1 walk a little too far in the heat so she is a little whingey which is hard going, especially with P2 still not 100%. It was a shame today as went to The Vyne (another NT property) and it could have been such a lovely day without the whingeing!!! They are being good girls though, and to be fair, I'm not enjoying the heat either!

How's things with your DH MrsHB

Things are still the same with DH. He's worried about his dad (who isn't well at the moment) so everything else has been put on hold.

magimedi Thu 18-Jul-13 22:48:01

Not selfish at all.

Speak to Mr P & take some time out this w/e.

An hour out the house for a walk?

And hour at home (Mr P takes the Pumblettes out) for you to have a peaceful bath/shower/time to read............

You really do need to go for that, Pumble.

LongTailedTit Fri 19-Jul-13 00:14:10

Do you have any friends who would have the Pumbletts for an hour and a half this weekend so you and Mr P can go for lunch? In this weather it's an easy ask, all they need do is supervise P1 in the paddling pool and keep P2 cool! In theory anyway. Whaddya reckon?

LittleBearPad Fri 19-Jul-13 07:04:50

You really wouldn't be selfish at all to take some time for the two of you.

Hope this is possible.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 19-Jul-13 14:10:08

Definitely not selfish. It is so hard to grab 10 minutes for yourself with children around, especially in the hot weather, but everyone needs some time to themselves. My husband notices how much more grumpy I am if I haven't had anytime for me for a few weeks. A walk in the park, a swim, gardening (only if children are not in the garden) or whatever you like. It might only be an hour but it works a treat for me. Down time in really important.

Look here http://m.videojug.com/film/how-to-sew-seams-together for tips on sewing knitting together.

The craft night was good, we are looking to do it once a month, it's a shame you are so far away, ut hopefully you will find a fellow crafted soon. We had people making necklaces, knitting, cross stitching, crocheting, and making beads, so cast your net wide to find someone.

Feeling crappy tonight, not sure if it's tiredness, money worries or what but I'm over sensitive & want to cry. Had a lovely day so no idea where this has come from.

LongTailedTit Sat 20-Jul-13 20:51:19

My sympathies MrsHB, I hope you're feeling a bit better now? Hope you can get a decent nights sleep now it's cooled down a bit.
I was irrationally screamy shouty horrible all yesterday and today, then . . . <cogs turning> . . . Oh yes, I'm due on in a few days. No idea why it seems to come as a surprise to me every month, altho since DS my PMT hits me like a ten ton truck, whereas before it was more like a hatchback.

Pumble Sat 20-Jul-13 21:45:12

How are you feeling MrsHB , hope you're feeling a bit better? I hope a good night's sleep does help. I do find sometimes having a cry does help, rather than trying not to cry if that makes sense (probably not).

I had my first CBT session yesterday - wow I can ramble on and on.... Two hours of my rambling! It did give me lots to think about though and I have homework to do.

We are off away to stay in my Granny's house in the Lakes tomorrow (five hours in the car - thank goodness it has cooled down a little) for a few days, so no way to get some time to ourselves but I am trying to think of a way to manage it.

Thanks for knitting link rowrow glad the craft night was a success.

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 20-Jul-13 22:05:37

So pleased to hear you have had your first CBT session.

You may not have a chance to have time for you and Mr P to be alone, but you could both have an hour or two of me time - you go for a long walk one day, then Mr P's turn. It will give you time just to daydream, think, or not think, just be, whatever you want.

And why not have a date night in, take a DVD and a bottle of wine with you, eat with the kids, and as soon as they are settled in bed, put on a film, get out the wine and malterers and enjoy. Or, if no DVD, don't eat with the girls, and then cook a special meal for the two of you with candles.

We had a ban on our holiday of all electricals so we could spend time in each others company and not glued to mumsnet on the Internet all night. You do wonder if you still have things to think about, but even if just sitting outside, not taling, but enjoying the weather, it was nice.

Sorry MrsH is feeling blue tonight.

I'm ok, although DS2 was up every 2 hours last night confused

magimedi Mon 22-Jul-13 19:21:37

How are you all?

Hope you are managing to cope with the heat.

Pumble - so pleased to hear that you have started on the CBT & also hope you are having a lovely (& cool) time in the Lakes.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 23-Jul-13 19:11:38

All ok here, though we all all tired and in need of a cool, good nights sleep.

LongTailedTit Tue 23-Jul-13 20:38:17

Ok here too, but bloody hell it was a sweaty day!
DS went to bed screaming but finally settled. He has a delightful new trick of glugging down his milk but holding onto a big mouthful then letting it pour out and all over his pjs and our bed. angry

Next door neighbour has a new kitten and it needs some playtime, so I'm off to fetch it over for cuddles. smile

magimedi Tue 23-Jul-13 22:27:08

Glad you are all OK - think tonight might be a tad cooler.

Shouldn't laugh but am at the mil trick, LTT!

Hope Pumble is having a cool & restful time in the Lakes.

Kittens & playtime sounds lovely.

Pumble Thu 25-Jul-13 22:02:16

Just saying hi now I'm back in the land of the internet! Hope you have all had better nights sleep now that the weather has cooled (especially hope you are having less broken sleep Mrshb )

There have been definite ups and downs since the weekend and this morning was one of those mornings that I just couldn't face getting out of bed, but I'm trying to focus on the fact there have been some ups!

must try to get some sleep now as absolutely shattered! Will check in tomorrow!

magimedi Thu 25-Jul-13 22:58:53

<waves at Pumble>

Sleep well!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 26-Jul-13 00:00:54

<waves too> welcome back!

Pumble Fri 26-Jul-13 21:19:46

Grrrrrrrrrrr. Can I curl in a ball and hide in a cupboard for a bit please? Think the pumblettes might prefer it to hmm

LongTailedTit Fri 26-Jul-13 21:34:24

Permission granted.
How about a (((HUG))) and a wine as well? Don't spill the wine in the cupboard! xxxxx

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 26-Jul-13 22:07:10

Maybe get a comfy cushion in there, and chocolate to go with the wine? And sssshhhh don't make too much noise on there, it will take them longer to find you....

Hope you are feeling a little better now?

Pumble Fri 26-Jul-13 22:09:58

A cushion, wine and chocolate?! I may never come out! Still want to stay in there but at least you've put a little smile on my face for a bit - thanks smile

magimedi Fri 26-Jul-13 22:37:17

Can I tempt you out of that cupboard with some crisps?

<scatters crumbs>

I hope it's not that bad - at least you have a sense of humor, looking at your last posts.

I would add gin to the cupboard hideaway but I suspect you can't indulge.

It will pass, honestly, I know that may sound trite, but it is true.

Big hug.......... (((xxx)))

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 27-Jul-13 09:49:34

<knocks gently> you fell asleep in the cupboard. Here's a cup of tea and some toast. Oh, and have today's newspaper, so you can make that cup of tea last a while.

Pumble Sat 27-Jul-13 10:41:48

I did fall asleep in the cupboard! A cup of tea has tempted me out-will see if I'm back in there by this evening wink

Pumble Sat 27-Jul-13 10:42:07

Ps. Gin in the cupboard always appreciated.

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 27-Jul-13 17:06:56

Well, hope you have had a nice day. We have spent the whole day outside and we have not had to hide from the sun once. Glad the cup of tea worked, but what was wrong with the toast? wink

Almost gin and tonic o'clock...

magimedi Sat 27-Jul-13 17:48:13

Glad you've had a nice day, row.

I've had a good day, got lots of jobs done & had a lovely swim on the high tide about 3.30pm.

Huge storm brewing here - think I'm going to have to switch off the computer.

Just realised it is gin o'clock!

I've had a grumpy wanting to throttle the boys kind of day. Only about 1/2 an hour ago did I start enjoying them & now it's bed time hmm

magimedi Sat 27-Jul-13 19:54:39

MrsHelsBels - at least you are putting them to bed with some joy.

I well remember days like that - and I only had one.

Pumble Sat 27-Jul-13 20:24:28

I don't always practise what I preach when I say this mrshb but....

I tell myself if they go to bed happy then that is the thought at the front of their minds as they go to sleep and so they sleep happy, no matter what has occurred the rest of the day

As I say, I don't practise what I preach but I try my best to do so.

We have had a much better day today and no hiding in the cupboard yet, although can't say no alcohol has passed my lips.....! wink

Hope the storm isn't too bad magimedi it's been pouring here since bedtime. I'm very jealous of your swim too.

Hope everyone gets a restful night....

Had one of the worst nights sleep ever last night & just want to cry this morning. DH was up with DS2 in the night so it's not really fair to make him get up so I'm just hoping a cup of tea will make things better.

magimedi Sun 28-Jul-13 09:05:58

Poor you, cup of tea & some food - bad sleep always makes me very hungry.

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 28-Jul-13 11:14:58

Poor MrsH. Head down, and crawl through the day as best you can. Hopefully this wind we're having will blow away all trials and tribulations.

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 28-Jul-13 21:15:36

Hello!

Pumble Sun 28-Jul-13 21:23:17

Hope your day improved mrshb

We've had a good weekend (since the cupboard visit wink)although some sleep would be nice-just can't seem to sleep well at night. I'm so exhausted by lunchtime at the moment!

Pumblette 1 is going through a lovely whingy phase though-delightful. Pumblette 2 is still having tests-hopefully no more now!

I've spent the evening trying to do my cbt homework.....another session tomorrow...

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 28-Jul-13 21:33:34

Good luck with your session tomorrow Pumble. Glad you have had a good weekend. I've had poor sleep too for a few weeks, poor DH had me growing this evening. I'm now tediously putting stuff on eBay to clear some room ad get some pennies. Bored of doing it now but loads more to do.

Don't you love whine and whine moments! I tell mine to get rid of the whiny voice and tell me properly, but they did an excellent impression of grumpy mummy this morning so I think I need to heed my own advice!

My dd2 is testing who blinks first. We are having tantrums that last ages, including at bedtime, so sadly, she is not going to bed happy. Here's hoping it is a two week blip that will pass. We are both stubborn.... wink.

Let us know how the session goes.

magimedi Mon 29-Jul-13 19:56:20

Hope that session went well, Pumble.

I have been slopping around all day in my dressing gown as have felt 'meh' but not quite ill. Sore throat, queasy & just 'off'.

Early night for me.

LongTailedTit Mon 29-Jul-13 21:28:59

Evening all!
Glad you didn't move back into the cupboard Pumble, how're you finding the CBT? I had phone appointments, kind if wish I'd gone for the in-person option as the remoteness meant I avoided some stuff quite easily!

Last week was a rerun of last year, dressing gown on til mid afternoon, I really need to sort my insomnia out, it's getting ridiculous. 3am bedtimes make me a crap mummy the next day.
I've been desperate for DS to start talking more, but realised that some days I'm practically a mute - no wonder his language skills are a bit stuck! sad

Here's to a better week for all of us - brew all round, make yours a honey & lemon Magi smile

Pumble Mon 29-Jul-13 21:30:54

How were DD2's whinges today rowrow I'm wondering if they can be put in a cupboard until they grow out of them?!

Hope you're sleeping well now magi and wake up feeling much better.

There wasn't much CBT today as I am having the sessions alongside some work on seeing how pumblette 2 and I interact so there was more of that today. I do find it hard work to think so much though and find that I am thinking and thinking but I suppose that that is a good thing really.

Just feeling a little flat but can't quite put my finger on it if that makes sense. I really need to go for a great run (which I haven't done in forever) but want to go with somebody (always more fun) but feel I am so out of practise there is nobody who would run with me. I always used to run with Mr P but obviously one of us needs to be with the pumblettes - grrr. Sorry - that was a little self indulgent sad

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 29-Jul-13 22:12:29

Evening all. It sounds like we all need some cupboard love, with ne thing or another!

Really hope Magi feels better after a good sleep, and long tail cracks the evil insomnia. That is a really cruel thing to suffer. The talking will come. Maybe if you haven't the energy to talk, you could sing along to your fav songs - it's still words, and could make him laugh if you do your best silly dancing too!

Whines have been scaled back today, and bedtime was much better. We are slowly getting her to bed earlier each night. By that, I mean she's giving up on the screaming and tantrums earlier each night. I think with the holiday and the heat, she had got used to late nights, and genuinely couldn't sleep and wanted company. At least there were no tears tonight. I think she's starting to learn that no doesn't change to yes the more she screams (though DD1 caves in very quickly, I've got to get her to hold her ground and not give up her favourite toys to stop the screaming, she is such a sweetheart, but puts herself last).

Are you feeling flat because your CBT was not so much around today? Are you keen for things to change, and flat because it takes time? Don't put too much pressure on yourself. It does take time. You have come a million miles since Christmas.

A good run is very good. I give up and walk if I don't run with someone and I think I am too rubbish to run with someone else. Another mum offered to run together recently and I thought she would be super fast, but she seemed to have a similar pace. I didn't talk for half the run for fear of running out of steam, but managed to give more that one word answers half way round when I realised I could just about do both and I was nearer the end than the beginning!

I bet you one wine in the cupboard you could find someone willing to run with you, who equally feels out of practise.

Pumble Tue 30-Jul-13 13:59:45

That cupboard is looking pretty attractive about now!! wink

Meh, boys can't share today so they're separated. If anyone's got spare room in a cupboard, preferably with wine, brew and biscuit I'd be happy.

Pumble Tue 30-Jul-13 17:05:16

Join me in my cupboard but its a pretty miserable place. I would find a happier cupboard if I were you.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 30-Jul-13 17:59:27

biscuit brew wine flowers and, in the hope that gin doesn't clash with whatever made magi feel meh, [gin]

Help yourself then retreat to respective cupboards.

Pumble Tue 30-Jul-13 18:50:24

All contributions to the cupboard appreciated, especially gin. It's been such a bad afternoon I think I'm going to bed when the pumblettes do in ten minutes. Maybe that way the day will be over sooner.

DS1 is still awake...would prefer vodka to gin though.

Feel terrible, just made DS1 cry. He jumped on me & hurt me, I shouted at him & pushed him off me, he fell over & cried. He wasn't hurt but said I frightened him. I'm such a crap mum.

LongTailedTit Wed 31-Jul-13 13:14:42

MrsHB I'm sorry you're having a shit morning. Tbh he jumped on you and you reacted - I would've done exactly the same. They do need to know that they sometimes hurt us, we're not blooming punchbags.
Another day he might have fallen over and walked off singing, or if he was my DS he would've jumped on you again! grin hmm

I've got crapmumitis and now DSs cold as well.

DS usually sleeps thru, but was up and really bloody awake from 12-5 last night. I'd had to keep the light on as he was doing his usual acrobatics on the edge of the bed, after a few hours of being kicked and pinched ("Funny, Mummy!" No DS, it really isn't) I'd had it and turned the light off in the hope that he'd get sleepy. He promptly fell off the bed. Screaming ensued (and a row with DH about who was having the shittest night hmm ). He's fine, but what a horrible night.

Pumble Wed 31-Jul-13 21:27:24

Sorry it's been a crappy day for ltt and mrshb

I would have done exactly the same thing mrshb and have done. It is mortifying at the time but sometimes it just happens. P1 got shouted at yesterday and yes, I've been feeling guilty since but my cbt man (who I saw today) did try to explain that shouting doesn't make you a crap mum. Your boys know how much you love them and one moment of shouting won't change that.

Really hope you get some more sleep tonight ltt

Yesterday was grim as I spent six hours trying to pin p2 down to get a wee sample....I spent over two hours crying as a result and was just horrible but today has been better. We managed a wee sample and cbt appointment was good but it does make me think a lot which I'm not sure is a good thing at times! The bit about looking at the communication and relationship between p2 and I definitely is an eye opener though.

I really hope that everyone has had a quiet evening and bedtime and we all get a good nights sleep.

Tomorrow is another day.......smile

LongTailedTit Wed 31-Jul-13 21:43:50

Yes, how the flipping heck are you meant to get a wee sample off a baby girl?? Have heard of tucking sandwich bags into boys nappies around the relevant plumbing, pretty sure that'd be a waste of time with a girl! Glad you got it in the end.

If you are ok talking about it, what is it about communication with P2?
I'm so glad you're finding it productive! smile

Pumble Wed 31-Jul-13 21:58:21

The worst bit of the wee sample is that it had to be 'clean' and so she had to be totally clean (a challenge when crawling around naked) and the sample bottle (which is tiny!) couldn't touch anything including her skin! It is our third attempt - the first two haven't been 'clean' enough (I think they touched her skin...!)

As part of the sessions, they film P2 and I doing activities together and then the following session, they show me clips from it and we talk about them. We look at how when she's playing with things, how she looks to me to communicate what she's looking at, how she wants to share things, looks to me for reassurance when things happen etc if that makes sense? I worry that all that has happened has interfered with me and P2 and that she is a poor neglected 2nd child (!) and so to see her want to share things with me and look to me for security etc is definitely helping. I'm not sure any of that makes sense? That probably all sounds entirely bonkers - I shall see if I can explain it better.

Is your DS asleep at the moment ltt ?

LongTailedTit Wed 31-Jul-13 23:33:07

Gosh that sounds very interesting, waaaay more involved than what I did!
One of my NCT group is a psychologist and she did a little talk for us about separation anxiety and how DC show their comfort/reassurance etc., it was really interesting but actually worries me a bit as DS has a few of the negative bonding behaviours.

DS is asleep, woke for a cry earlier, but I decided to let him settle in his own this time as last night's wakings led to our all-night-playtime-marathon. He was pretty good today considering, and had a late bedtime so hopefully he'll go right thru to morning. Speaking of which, I must take myself off to bed too!

Hope you have a good night, and that you never have to collect magic clean wee in a thimble again! smile xxx

Pumble Thu 01-Aug-13 21:07:41

It is really interesting ltt and I hope will help with the CBT too, although I feel there is so much to do...

Hope you all had a better night and day, despite the heat.

I will have to do another wee sample... P2 is now on antibiotics and another sample in ten days and then a scan of her kidneys. Not helped that we are leaving the country tomorrow for ten days... They aren't sure they are the right antibotics and won't know until we have left and so we may have to visit a nice foreign doctor to change them if necessary. Ho hum.... Breathe, breathe, breathe and hope it's all ok.

Can I have an award for phoning my mother in law to tell her about P2. Needless to say she screened my call but I phoned her and left a message and given she hates me, I feel pretty proud of myself.

I saw my HV today who has an idea that I feel is a little crazy - I shall fill you in when I have thought about it a bit. Unlikely to have internet for most of the time when away so hope you all have a good week.

I'm really going to miss you all!! smile

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 01-Aug-13 21:56:19

Pumble, your sessions sound really constructive. Well done with contacting the in laws. Hope P2 has the right Antibiotics and that you all have a fantastic holiday. Don't get too stressed packing, and hope you get a little time to be with MrP.

Also sending good vibes to ltt and mrshb and that all the little ones have no tantrums tomorrow, as that is entirely possible, isn't it? hmm

magimedi Thu 01-Aug-13 22:19:26

Have a lovely holiday, Pumble.

Hope everyone else is OK.

Still got lurking lurgy (only way I can describe it) & feeling a bit down but will be OK.

Pumble Fri 02-Aug-13 13:49:58

Hope you beat the lurgy soon magi

Breathe, breathe, breathe..... Did not need there to be big delays at eurotunnel today.... Hot, tired and grumpy.... (And that's just me never mind the pumblettes....!)

magimedi Mon 05-Aug-13 08:43:25

How are you all? My lurgy is better, thank god.

Am about to go shopping for clothes - a task I hate but need something to wear to DS's wedding party. Wedding was in May and tiny, just close family. Big party where they live - casual & need nice top to go with trousers. Wish me luck. I will either be very grumpy or very happy by lunchtime!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 07-Aug-13 18:14:13

Hi Magimedi, how did the shopping go? Were you happy or grumpy?

All well here, enjoying the weather - fine and warm, just right for beng outside!

magimedi Wed 07-Aug-13 19:51:17

Shopping was good & bad.

I saw an amazing top in the first shop I went into - totally fab, just what I wanted.

But........ because it was the first shop I didn't buy it & spent another hour flogging round other shops that were full of shite & ended up back at first shop & bought the top! (Was hot,sweaty & cross at the end).

But overall success & it meant I didn't have to go further afield to find right top.

As mother-of-the-groom I felt I had to make a bit of an effort!

What a first world problem!

How are you all? And your DCs?

It is just so amazing to be having a few consecutive weeks of decent summer weather.

magimedi Mon 12-Aug-13 19:22:33

Just passing by. How is everyone?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 12-Aug-13 20:57:04

<waves from window> alright thank you. Managed to stop the screaming at night of DD2, and everyone is at last back to normal bedtime. DD2 has started wandering into our room at night, but doesn't complain when stake her back, so much less stressful and tiring to deal with.

Trying to work out what job to do when I go back to work, and what I could do in limited hours now, lots of stuff swimming round my head!

The moral of your shopping trip is to get the first thing you see, then put your feet up! When's the celebration?

magimedi Mon 12-Aug-13 22:22:03

* DD2 has started wandering into our room at night, but doesn't complain when stake her back, *

I am laughing so much at the idea of you 'staking' DD2!! The Exorcist springs to mind!

What is your line of work? When do you go back?

The celebrations start in early September, when we go to France to see DS & DDIL & it's a weekend long party. He works in the hotel/travel industry & his boss has given him the hotel for his wedding party as a wedding gift.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 13-Aug-13 06:58:24

Oh, that is hilarious! I didn't notice! Rest assured she is alive and well, with no holes in her back.

I was a buyer, but want to so something more service orientated, like teaching. I'm volunteering in schools to get a better idea of what it is like.

The weekend party in France sounds lovely.

magimedi Tue 13-Aug-13 07:40:57

Teaching? You are brave!!!

Hope DD2 stayed tethered all night! grin

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 13-Aug-13 09:38:38

Well, reading about teaching on Mumsnet, I should run a mile. DD2 came in at 6am this morning, quiet as a church mouse.

magimedi Wed 14-Aug-13 19:45:16

row - BIL has just retired from teaching (at the age of 62) & he is not on MN & he says he would not recommend anyone to go down that line.

When does the lovely Pumble get back from 'furrin parts'?

Pumble Wed 14-Aug-13 21:10:18

Pumble is back! And survived her first day with the pumblettes on her own after almost two weeks of extra help, although when pumblette2 started chatting to herself at 5:30am this morning I was worried if we would all survive the day (thankfully she put herself back to sleep until 7:30 - same can't be said for me!).

How are you all? You are very brave possiblycrazy to be thinking about teaching row

Holiday definitely had its ups and downs and two very tired pumblettes but so good to spend time with all the family. There were times when I just wanted to curl in a ball but got through it. Still trying to sort ourselves out but wanted to come and wave hello now I'm back!

The celebrations sound lovely magi - glad that you found something to wear.

Hope wylye and mrshb have had a good couple of weeks.

It's good to be back with you all!! smile

magimedi Wed 14-Aug-13 22:29:21

Lovely to see you back, Pumble.

Hope that you & Mr. P had a bit of time & a glass of [wine}

I think that most of us want to curl up in ball when on a family holiday!

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 15-Aug-13 07:42:26

Welcome back! It took us a few holidays before we adjusted to family holidays. Hope it doesn't take the pumblettes to settle back to the home routine.

Yes, possibly crazy, but I have a year to back away slowly if it is not for me!

How are LongTail and MrsH?

LongTailedTit Fri 16-Aug-13 11:22:01

Welcome back Pumble! Have you seen, we now have cake ! Hurray!

Every time I've tried to type a reply on here DS has gone into Super Whine mode and climbed all over me and the iPad, so I'm afraid I gave up. Bizarrely, he didn't seem to interfere when I posted on other threads!
I'm typing this with his foot on my hand, oh now he's on my lap... hmm

Good to hear your holiday was a success, shame you've come back to grey skies, hopefully we can eke out a bit more summer before it gets cold too.
How's P2?

rowrowrow you're def brave to be considering teaching, I met a woman last week at a birthday party who's currently a midwife and is considering training to be a HV! Jaws fell to the floor when she told us, you'd think she'd said she wanted to be a traffic warden! grin

Glad you got your outfit sorted Magi, your DSs party sounds fab.

LongTailedTit Fri 16-Aug-13 11:23:24

Hmmmm, the cake appears to have turned into a blue question mark box, decidedly less tasty..... hmm

magimedi Fri 16-Aug-13 17:35:46

I'm typing this with his foot on my hand,

I speed read that as my foot on his head & was really starting to get a bit anxious, what with Row staking her DD !! grin

Thick mist & rain here but our neighbour opposite is being filmed for 'Come Dine With Me' & am having great fun watching all the guests turn up! One is a dead ringer for Sue Pollard!!!!!!!!!!

Probably totally outing myself there!

cake but it's more like time for wine now.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 16-Aug-13 18:10:16

How exciting to see come dine with me come to your road. I love the narrator. Do they arrive really early then?

What's your DS upto now LongTail?

Ps I'm having steak tonight with DH wink.

magimedi Fri 16-Aug-13 19:43:41

Jeez - the crew have been her since 9am.

The participants arrived about 5pm & were fannying round for ages before they were filmed going in.

And neighbour took aaaaages to answer the door!

I will PM you when I know it's going to be on!!

And sorry, Pumble for hijacking your thread - we seem to have a small quiche going on here.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 16-Aug-13 19:53:13

Small quiche? Think come dine with mess going to my head. Comments Pumble and MrsH, what are your typo / auto corrects going to be?

Soo funny. I like this thread, even if it is a little bit egg flan like grin

How's your week been Pumble?

magimedi Fri 16-Aug-13 20:22:32

row Have you been on the wine ? shock

(I have grin )

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 16-Aug-13 20:38:40

Oh my, I must have been, looking at that last post, I didn't notice! Wine is gong down nicely thank you.

Anyone else fancy joining us? wine

LongTailedTit Fri 16-Aug-13 20:43:27

Gawd, I might start on the wine myself, and I don't even like it!
DS has spent most of the day SHOUTING and SCREAMING - he's been in caps lock all bloody day! My nerves are fried. He went to bed at 8, so all ok now.

I'm doing my own head in, first month of TTC and I can't POAS for another week - I've been researching for new buggies already FFS! blush

I like quiche. Bring it on.

Pumble Fri 16-Aug-13 21:24:13

I like quiche too grin!

Feeling so poorly tonight-headache from hell-even turned down alcohol-must be something up!!

P1 weed all over the floor this afternoon-grrr. I don't think I handled it as well as I should have done though but lots and lots of hugs for the rest of the day so hope she's ok.

You must tell us when it's being shown magi can't believe they have been there that long-please tell me they have left now?!

Hope they're exciting pushchairs you are researching!! I can't remember yours at all (where has my memory gone!) - actually not nothing-I think it was black!

This headache better let me sleep or I shall be most grumpy!

Oooh-p2 appears to have teeth!! Noticed the first when I put my finger in her mouth one day in France and think we might have the second one by the feel of it too! So neglectful not to notice teeth until I feel them!

LongTailedTit Fri 16-Aug-13 22:02:37

Ugh - headache sympathy! Have you taken anything for it?

How has P2 been teething so quietly?? Well done her!
DS's teeth have always announced their presence with a month of drool, biting everything in sight, and general grump. Best ones were after he had his head tweaked by the cranial osteopath - he had 7 teeth before then cut 10 thru in a week!

Nah - nothing exiting pushchair-wise, I have a BJCM but don't fancy spending £150 for the carrycot so trying to make it work without. Might use a Bugaboo type cocoon in it, but would far rather have parent-facing for the first year, so tempted to get a cheapy.

Pumble Sat 17-Aug-13 19:46:05

P1 teethed quietly as well-it's that Celtic pain threshold they have inherited!! P2 has been a bit grumpy in the day but seeing as she has got two teeth through in less than two weeks I'll let her off!!

I love my parent facing pushchair ltt - not that I'm encouraging you at all!!

What time did come dine with me end magi definitely looking forward to watching it grin

Headache largely gone so back on the wine tonight - a friend on Facebook said how she wasn't allowed to drink until she'd stopped breastfeeding-I pointed out I was told to feed with a glass of wine in the early days-not sure how it went down-think she might be questioning my parenting now wink.

Big family reunion tomorrow.....you know how these events bring out the best in people....confused

Hope you're all having a great Saturday smile

magimedi Sat 17-Aug-13 19:59:57

Saw neighbour seeing them all off (in his Elvis suit) about 10.45!!

Family reunion - I am assuming this is Mr P's lot?

Drink wine & smile. It will pass!

Pumble Sat 17-Aug-13 20:16:09

No it is mine but a very large family reunion, including cousins who have flown in from Canada for the first time in years and aren't the easiest people to get on with. And we found out this week that they went down to stay within 15 minutes of my 97 year old Granny for a week (with their mother who's my aunt), apparently to see my Granny (their mother and Granny and Great Granny) and they saw her for twenty minutes, the whole time they were down there.... As you can imagine, this has irked my mother and I just a little, especially as my Granny was really looking forward to their visits. We will see but let's just say it will be hard work at times. There's a park nearby though and I think we might take the pumblettes there a lot!!! Anyways - it will be fine and it will be great to see my mum and dad.

Mr P's lot can't do a family reunion - that would involve them actually seeing members of their family!!!

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 17-Aug-13 23:13:57

I can hear that park calling to you already!

The beauty of big reunions is you can keep moving on to different people, and the beauty of P1 and p2 is the NEED for you to be dragged away from the chatting to sort out their drinks / food / nappy / nap / entertainment .... The list could go on and on wink

Pumble Sun 18-Aug-13 09:48:20

Plus, the traffic might be awful....it would be such a shame if we got 'stuck' in a mysterious traffic jam....wink

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 18-Aug-13 21:35:24

Sooooo, how was it Pumble?

magimedi Mon 19-Aug-13 13:03:16

Did you lurk in the park or get 'stuck' in traffic?

Pumble Mon 19-Aug-13 21:02:52

Well, we did get stuck in traffic but also someone drove into the back of us en route... we and the car were fine, if a little shaken and P1 in particular found the big bang and jolt quite a shock. Not what we needed really. The day wasn't as bad as it might have been though and the wife of one of my cousins very much saved my sanity and kept me company at the park! Threw all the children in the bath together at the end of the day and it did look a little like a comedy creche by the evening when everyone was trying to feed the babies!

It's been a funny day today and CBT tomorrow.... I am so tempted to cancel but Mr P thinks it's best not to...

magimedi Mon 19-Aug-13 21:57:48

I am with Mr P - don't cancel, wanting to cancel is a bit of the reason why you need to go. (IYSWIM).

And if you did cancel you might not get on it again.

Stern Mummy voice says you should go!

And it will be fine.

And we will log in to be there for you. Before & after!

(((xxxxxx)))

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 19-Aug-13 22:02:17

Agree with Magimedi. You should go. Go. Let us know if it is in the morning or afternoon and we will think of you.

Sorry to hear about your bump, and hope your funny day was not too tough.

Pumble Mon 19-Aug-13 22:27:59

It's at 10 tomorrow morning. I can't just not turn up as he comes to the house so in some ways I guess that's handy...

Just been scrubbing the bathroom from top to bottom with a toothbrush.... As P1 says I'm 'mad as a box of frogs'....! smile

magimedi Tue 20-Aug-13 08:18:50

You could use a scrubbing brush for the larger areas!!

Will be thinking of you at 10 - glad it's early so that you get it over with.

Lovely day here & suspect it is with you. Hope you can do something nice this afternoon.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 20-Aug-13 09:12:33

It's lovely here too. Have your appointment, then reward yourself with doing something nice this afternoon with the pumblettes that involves no housework at all, and definitely not with toothbrushes. Enjoy your afternoon.

magimedi Tue 20-Aug-13 09:42:05

Have to add that I do keep old toothbrushes for cleaning & have been known to use them + bleach in the bathroom for mouldy grout.

CBT will soon be over.

Then enjoy yourself.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 20-Aug-13 14:28:53

Don't use toothbrushes on the silicon round the bath though, I did that and broke the seal and let the horrid black stuff in. Had to get new silicon in the end.

We are just back from the park, and in need of a cuppa

Pumble Tue 20-Aug-13 14:48:41

Well, I got through it.

P1 is knackered so we are cuddled up on the sofa whilst p2 sleeps watching old Disney short cartoons as a special treat for her and me!! Back out in the sun soon though.

Pumble Tue 20-Aug-13 14:49:23

Thanks for tip on silicone round the bath. Toothbrushes and toothpaste great for limescale though. smile

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 20-Aug-13 17:34:28

Haven't tried toothpaste on lime scale. I will do that to the taps tonight! Oh, how my life has changed, to be excited abut that!

Sounds like a nice snuggle in front if the tv.

Remember the end goal of CBT...

Pumble Tue 20-Aug-13 18:38:39

A fun packed night ahead for you then row grin

Is this what life has become? Swapping cleaning tips?!

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 20-Aug-13 21:52:26

Good grief, cleaning tips, knitting talk, I must really make myself younger. Pumble, please do something young and fun on our behalf. Make it your mission.

magimedi Tue 20-Aug-13 22:19:36

Shall I go out and check all the houses on the estate ( about 360) for pampas grass outside (I know of at least 3) & then report back?

Old white haired woman arrested for asking if her neighbours 'swing'??

Got to be better than cleaning!

See you tomorrow, ladies.

(After I've changed the bedding & done the weekly shop grin )

LongTailedTit Tue 20-Aug-13 23:20:27

Evening! I remember realising the time had come to quit a nanny skivvy job when I was showing genuine interest in adverts for cleaning products. Sad sad times!

These days I avoid cleaning at all costs, until I can ignore it no longer. I really need to Hoover...
DH is away this week and bizarrely I feel full of energy - just painted DSs cardboard Wendy house!

Glad you got thru the CBT, how many more have you got to go?

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 21-Aug-13 07:50:58

grin

Also like longtailed philosophy on cleaning!

Pumble Wed 21-Aug-13 12:49:17

I'm not sure about the young and fun bit....at 5 o'clock at the reunion on Sunday, I turned around and said 'surely its time for a cup of tea now' whilst others were still on the alcohol....hmmmm

Pumble Thu 22-Aug-13 10:10:03

Sitting waiting for p2's scan (well still in the car as she is sleeping!).

So much stuff going through my head since cbt session on Tuesday. Tempted to email a list of bullet points to him so that I can then try to put it to the back of my mind as I don't need to try to remember to tell him next week-does that make sense?! Think there are 6 or 7 sessions left-slightly lost count! At the moment the part looking at p2 and I is working wonders and the cbt part is just bloody hard work and feels like I'm sort of going backwards in some ways.

Hmmm-didn't mean that to be as long-was just saying hi to all really! Happy Thursday smile

magimedi Thu 22-Aug-13 10:20:19

Hope the scan is OK.

I would go ahead & email the bullet points - can't hurt.

I remember DS saying that at one point he felt that he was taking one step forward & two back with his CBT - but now, some years later, he realises how good it was.

Have a good day - woke up to rain this morning - can't remember that for ages!

LongTailedTit Thu 22-Aug-13 10:59:01

Yep, agree its a good idea to get it all written down, even just doing that will help you process what's going on.

Hope the Hosp appointment goes well, brew and cake all round when you get home eh?

LongTailedTit Thu 22-Aug-13 11:03:02

Yep, agree its a good idea to get it all written down, even just doing that will help you process what's going on.

Hope the Hosp appointment goes well, brew and cake all round when you get home eh?

LongTailedTit Thu 22-Aug-13 11:04:01

Sorry for double post! Site went down!
You can never have too much brew and cake tho... smile

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 22-Aug-13 15:12:31

Hope you have good news for p2.

Definitely write things down, then save as draft and send later once you think you've covered what you want.

Lad to hear the sessions with p2 are going well, and your CBT will make a difference to you, you're jut nt t the end of the process yet.

Enjoy your tea and cake.

Pumble Fri 23-Aug-13 11:44:00

Just accidentally locked p1 in the house... She was a legend and followed my instructions that I shouted through the letter box exactly and so I got some house keys to open the door and get back in! smile Feel like a total muppet though!

LongTailedTit Sun 25-Aug-13 00:48:53

Well done P1! Hope she got a sticker for her efforts!

I'm paranoid about locking DS in, always have to pat my keys in my pocket before I'll open the door - it's easily done.

How're you doing this weekend?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 26-Aug-13 21:40:59

What a cool headed daughter! Hope you all have had a nice bank holiday.

Pumble Tue 27-Aug-13 20:36:01

I want to hide away hmm. On the plus side, I'd like the girls to hide with me!

LongTailedTit Tue 27-Aug-13 21:54:28

What's making you feel low lovey?

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 27-Aug-13 22:09:47

Don't hide.

Talk. Or, go to bed, dream lovely dreams, and tomorrow you and the pumblettes can roar at whatever is making you want to hide.

Pumble Tue 27-Aug-13 22:28:06

I like your idea row especially the roaring! I'm going to attempt sleep until my usual insomnia wake up 3 hours later anyway. If bed and roaring fails, I'll work on talking.

Now, where to go and roar tomorrow?! smile

LongTailedTit Tue 27-Aug-13 22:47:52

Tbf, roaring is pretty damn effective! Hope you get some rest and can play at Lions with the lion cubs Ps in the morning, they needn't know why you're putting extra effort into your roars!

magimedi Wed 28-Aug-13 07:31:52

Hope you have somewhere nice to go & roar. It's a lovely day here.

Pumble Fri 30-Aug-13 13:57:06

Ok ladies....what makes a good mother? Part of my CBT homework-any ideas welcome!! smile

Hope you are all having a good week-at least it's Friday! grin

Roaring was a great success by the way!

LongTailedTit Fri 30-Aug-13 18:07:26

Ooh I shall have to think about that for a bit! Currently trying to shovel beans on toast into DS.

My aunt calls roaring Primal Scream Therapy, I prefer pretending to be a lion... ;)

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 30-Aug-13 19:23:37

Love Primal Scream Therapy!

I will have to think too!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 30-Aug-13 21:51:15

Ok, I need to think some more, but

A good mum is true to her word,if she says you can do/have something/go somewhere, then it happens, even if the child forgets, and if mum says if you do that again then x happens, then x happens. That means she is someone you can always rely on, someone dependable, someone who's word you trust.

A good mum will always be ready for a cuddle, and will be there, will just 'be' in the house, or somewhere near.

A good mum is a good role model, do as I do, rather than do as I say.

A good mum says sorry sometimes, when she has got it wrong and been too harsh

A good mum gives her child opportunities for friendships, for a support network that lasts years. I hope my girls feel they can turn to some of MY friends to talk to, when they are pissed off with me, or their dad, or friends, or whatever. I hope my girls have honest, good friends of their own.

A good mum lets their child be themselves, show their own personalities, gives them a chance to workout things themselves, to grow in confidence in the realisation that they did it.

A good mum gives their child time and opportunities to learn, to have fun, to reflect, to be bored, to be part of a family (however extended) and her child knows that they are deeply loved even in the shouty moments.

A good mum sometimes says no.

A good mum gives herself a break, moves on from the inevitable bad moments and learns from them, has her own sense of purpose, her own interests/work/hobby that gives herself self belief and confidence.

I think everyone will think something different, would remove lots from my list and replace with their own. mine has been fuelled by thinking while. ironing for two hours on a Friday night hmm

Pumble Fri 30-Aug-13 22:01:45

Wow row - that's some list and that two hours of ironing clearly led to some pretty great thinking!

It's so different to how I was trying to quantify it (which involved 'doing arty crap' with your children - as I told my CBT man today!) and actually in many ways makes more sense. Maybe I need to try to look at it in a different way rather than actual things.

I've also got to come up with a list of what makes a crap mother too (the category I think I fall into)

Pumble Fri 30-Aug-13 22:02:51

I especially like your last one row - hard as it is

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 30-Aug-13 22:22:04

But doing arty crap, is BEING with your children, doing the same thing as them, having your attention, even when you are not talking, it everyone is sticking, or colouring, or concentrating. You just need to interpret all the great things you do, into another way of seeing it. " colouring in with P1 let's her kow I am with her, spending time with her is important to me, andi enjoy it' 'singing with P2 makes us giggle together and gives us happy memories"

About the crap list, everyone can write that list,and make it a long one, but I doubt you are a crap mum.

Think of what you do, and the benefits of that, it won't be crap. Going to a playgroup gives your child a chance to develop social skills. An hour in the park gives your child a sense of enjoying being outdoors, another great thing. A routine over a week makes a child feel safe and secure. A break from the routines gives a sense of adventure, or the ability to cope with change. You can find the positive in a lot of things you do with the pumblettes.

I don't do half those things, but if I stop and think, it is what I would like to achieve.

I have really really got to work on the last one too. Oh, and the do as I do. I hear them talking to their dolls, and think, yeah, ok now where that has come from.

LongTailedTit Sat 31-Aug-13 00:35:47

Yup, good work row!

I'm feeling a bit fried, just typed this out (don't read unless you've got your marathon eyes on!) and just remembered I still have to make the bed before I can get in it. Bah humbug.

A good mum:

Covers the basics - everyone fed, clean, and warm.
Is trustworthy, with the daftest or the most serious stuff.
Makes you feel secure, wherever you are.
Always up for a hug.
Jumps in puddles/makes faces/blows raspbellies etc.
Makes sure you know you come first, while also being able to set boundaries and say no when necessary (hmm! Fine balancing act!)
Has high standards, but knows when they don't matter.
Doesn't try to make you something you're not.
Thinks you can do anything in the world, but will be proud of you whatever.
Supports you when you become an adult.
Becomes a soppy grandparent.

Pumble Sat 31-Aug-13 07:20:45

Oh no - forgetting to make the bed until its needed is beyond rubbish.... Hope you got a good night once it was done!

Firstly - congratulations ltt grin grin grin That's great news-am so pleased for you! I haven't managed to read it all properly yet as two pumblettes came to climb on the bed part way through so will do later but no two children are the same. I'll read it properly when the pumblettes allow but wanted to say congratulations early onsmile

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 31-Aug-13 09:28:15

I hate hate had getting to bed and seeing it is not made.

Congratulations LTT, bet it will be different this time round, but please talk.

LongTailedTit Sat 31-Aug-13 12:48:26

Thank you ladies! Tis only early days, fx it sticks.

Sorry about that marathon post on t'other thread, I couldn't seem to condense it. blush

DS woke up before i had finished making the bed and decided he'd had plenty of sleep and it was time to muck about, reckon he dropped off again about 4ish, so really not a good night. Ah well.
It's a beautiful sunny day, and DH is heading home from work - this weekend can only improve!

Hope you are all having good weekends out there, xxx.

Pumble Mon 02-Sep-13 19:51:45

Just waving hello smile

LongTailedTit Mon 02-Sep-13 19:56:49

<waves back, with a bar of Green & Black's on lap>

Pumble Mon 02-Sep-13 21:01:03

ooh - what type of G & B?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 02-Sep-13 21:18:19

<waves>

Just finished more ironing! What is it with me? All gone now and out the way,until the next load of washing..

Is there enough G&B to pass around? I have chocolate fingers here if anyone wants to trade.

Pumble Mon 02-Sep-13 21:33:39

My ironing basket is overflowing - do you fancy some more row ?

I have celebrations that Mr P gave me for my birthday - the snickers are definitely up for a trade....

LongTailedTit Mon 02-Sep-13 22:15:11

All gone now sorry! Only had a few square left anyway. It was their Milk choc, sadly I ran out of the Creamy Milk last week <sadface>

DH is away, and I really need to go to bed now, but also really need to do some very overdue work.... Gah! Can't decide! Haven't had supper either, have loafed about all day with DS so have no appetite.

Ironing? What is this madness you speak of?
I advocate giving things a firm shake and hanging them out carefully, we tend to only iron for weddings and similar events!

Pumble Tue 03-Sep-13 20:43:41

Perhaps we should begin your method of giving things a firm shake ltt

I hope you have had supper tonight too - how are you feeling? When has your DS got his first sessions at nursery - is it soon?

I'm trying to convince P1 that she wants to come to bed and have a sleep with me when P2 has her afternoon nap - it's not really working!! She is so tired and could do with it but alas, no! So, the celebrations were my source of energy this afternoon - soooo healthy! Those snickers are still going begging though....

LongTailedTit Tue 03-Sep-13 21:02:17

Ooh I'll take your snickers... Supper had and feet up - knackered already!

DS starts preschool next Tuesday, just two mornings a week this term. I'm a bit nervous - just dreading him biting someone really!

Oh how I wish DS still napped... That'd be heaven.
Keep trying to persuade P1, you never know, she might crumble! Otherwise maybe try making P2s nap time film time? Then you can both snuggle upon the sofa every day and she might drop off by accident! smile

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 03-Sep-13 22:13:51

No thank you to more ironing, and yes please to celebrations! Taken a few choc fingers today, but still plenty left if you want to swap.

Tried the hard shake today, everything still looks really creased!

Like the film idea, though Pumble may sleep before P1!

Off to cry myself to sleep now, DD1 starts school tomorrow. I am going to miss her!

LongTail - he will be fine at pre school. Enjoy this week and remember, the biting may well not happen.

Pumble Tue 03-Sep-13 22:33:22

Well, the snickers are definitely available row

I can well understand the tears about dd1 going to school - the pumblettes are never going to grow up enough to go (they're staying my babies forever!). Think of how excited she'll be to share it all with you at the end of the day though (small consolation though at th

Pumble Tue 03-Sep-13 22:37:33

So that shouldn't have gone.... bloodyiphone

Where was I?!

Small consolation at the moment though I can only imagine.

The biting may well not happen ltt. He didn't bite either pumblette did he?

I'll report back on whether the firm shake works for me-I fear mr P's shirts will still need the iron...! And it's quite sweet watching p1 iron them on her ironing board!

Yes, I would be asleep before p1 if we watched a film....!

Good luck tomorrow row smile

LongTailedTit Tue 03-Sep-13 22:39:51

Aw, I've seen so many 'first day of school' pics on Facebook today, they're so sweet! Hope she's excited rowrowrow?

Yeah, don't worry about the shaking - I suspect I have low standards of creasyness, as even ironed items look creased after they've been on me five minutes!
Whenever I do iron I get quite carried away and iron literally everything I can lay my hands on. It's quite therapeutic. smile

LongTailedTit Tue 03-Sep-13 22:42:22

Good point, they escaped his gnashers didn't they! But he bit his friend the other day completely out of the blue, so it does worry me.

Hey Mrs Pumble - do give me a shout if you fancy another trip over this way eh? xx

Pumble Thu 05-Sep-13 23:23:23

How is school going row

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 06-Sep-13 20:09:36

Hi. DD1 went in beautifully day one, and i was so proud and happy, but she was so tired At the end, we had an awful evening. She was upset on the way to school on her first full day too, but has had two good days, and not too daunted by lunch.

I was upset because of the tantrums on the first night and that she was unhappy before school the next day. I hope that gets forgotten about. I knew she would be tired, just didn't anticipate how much that would translate to it being taken out on me.

DD2 goes back to playgroup next week, and then we can all find our new rhythm of the week, and enjoy our weekends.

How are you? How's your homework going?

Pumble Mon 16-Sep-13 16:05:50

So I've been hibernating from the thread because things have been so crappy and was waiting until things were better to post but now they are even worse hmm

I just want to give up. I'm making the pumblettes life so awful and they are suffering so much because I'm such a crap mother. Turns out I don't need a list of what being a crap mother is-you just need to look at me.

And to top it all off-I now have to go and teach for an hour, first time since p2 was born and I'm sobbing uncontrollably and look a mess.

Oh deep joys.

Pumble Mon 16-Sep-13 16:06:25

So I've been hibernating from the thread because things have been so crappy and was waiting until things were better to post but now they are even worse hmm

I just want to give up. I'm making the pumblettes life so awful and they are suffering so much because I'm such a crap mother. Turns out I don't need a list of what being a crap mother is-you just need to look at me.

And to top it all off-I now have to go and teach for an hour, first time since p2 was born and I'm sobbing uncontrollably and look a mess.

Oh deep joys.

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 16-Sep-13 16:23:44

Oh Pumble, I have been wondering how you are.

Imagine all those MNetters who were on your ast thread. remember the strength they gave you. Now take that strength, imagine all of them iing you a big squeeze and cheer, hold your head up high, and tell yourself this is a blip. You know you have to go backwards sometimes before you move forward again, and that is all this is. you will be moving forward again. Good luck teaching, and then after that, have a big Cuddle with your Pumblettes, who adore you and think the world of you. I bet you are not a crappy mum at all, you are just looking and remembering the crappy moments that everyone has in any week. Try and think of the magic moments too.

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 16-Sep-13 16:44:00

Be strong, we are right there with you.

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 16-Sep-13 20:59:07

So, how was the teaching, and how are you now?

Remember the things you can control to put you at your best for coping: eat well, rest lots, whether sleeping or not filling your evening with jobs, and if you can, exercise. A brisk walk in the park would do it.

Pumble Mon 16-Sep-13 21:28:52

Teaching was really good and made me realise how much I missed it. And it went ok which I m trying to remember is a positive.

Bedtime was chaos when I got home. P1 was totally distraught when I left and wouldn't let go so was very clingy and p2 just seemed a bit unsettled by it all. It made me not want to go again but on the other hand I know it's a good thing for us all (in my calmer moments).

Everything just seems so hard at the moment-not helped by seeing the in laws tomorrow which will be grim (especially as p1 has a stinking cold).

I'm doing shred every morning which I think is the only thing even vaguely keeping me going....p1 is getting rather good at it, especially her press ups.

Feeling a little more calm than I was earlier-it just suddenly got so bad I didn't know where else to turn. I really need to keep talking.

(Probably doesn't help that I haven't had cbt for ages due to me chickening out of appointment....)

So much more to say but going to try to grab five minutes sleep before the chronic insomnia kicks in (how can I get a good nights sleep?!)

Thank you thank you thank you smile

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 16-Sep-13 22:06:10

Glad the teaching was good. You are a woman of many different talents and elements, you are more than any single one of them. A mum, a teacher, a wife, a friend, a knitter, a etc, each one makes you a worthwhile, interesting, good person.

Keep talking, sleep well, and as for insomnia, do the opposite of what my DH does, he hasn't found the trick yet, and when you find it, let me know what it is.

I'm off to google shred now. May join you in the morning if I don't get scared off by what it is!

LongTailedTit Mon 16-Sep-13 22:09:36

Evening Pumble,
So glad to hear you perking up a bit and v glad to hear you enjoyed teaching too - I typed out a reply earlier and had to attend to His Lordship mid post so lost it, but you sounded so low.
Row is right in everything she says, I'd stick it on a Post It on the fridge if I were you!

Reading your posts makes me wonder about the physical side of your PND - the chemical brain imbalance side of things I mean. Sometimes sheer willpower and counselling aren't able to boost you enough to recover, would you consider trying ADs in case they're able to help you get your balance back?

Always here if you fancy a RL chat too, you are very welcome.
Big 'ol hug ((((smile))))

LongTailedTit Mon 16-Sep-13 22:11:23

Row The 30 Day Shred is eeeevill I warn you! I wrecked my knees doing the jumping jacks wrong.... blush
It's v effective tho, and you get quite caught up in it (if you don't break yourself). smile

Pumble Tue 17-Sep-13 07:11:33

I'm enjoying shred far more than I should-even level 3. Think it gets into your brain wink!

I had been thinking about ADs but my concern is what happens when you stop them - does life just go back to how it was? Maybe it is just a blip too-it's just been a pretty grim blip (a massive understatement!).

I'm planning on playing in law bingo again today -the only way to survive. The girls outfits will be criticised, what they eat, how p1 talks, the fact p2 doesn't like being held by strangers which they are, p1's shyness with strangers, our parenting style...there will be more im sure ill think of!

I'm soooo tired

How's school going row -all settled? How are you feeling ltt

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 17-Sep-13 11:50:37

Right, jumping jacks? Think I will try the easy ones first!

Hope the in laws are ok today. Keep thinking about ad's, the doctor can talk about what happens after the course. Can you go for a nap while the inlaws have the pumblettes??

And how if longtailedtit?

LongTailedTit Tue 17-Sep-13 16:05:37

How's the Bingo going Pumble?
Did you make the tea wrong? Were the biscuits unsuitable? wink
They WILL eventually leave, hang on to that thought!

With the ADs, when I came off them I had a few wobbles of feeling panicky/overwhelmed but they were short-lived and I had so much more perspective by then that I found I could get over them quite easily. The despair wasn't there anymore.
I reckon the 'withdrawal' took a couple of months, and it's not a time to be complacent, you really need to be self aware and make an effort to keep on top of it. But then, the whole thing is a learning curve, and you have to stay mindful permanently anyway!
Kind of like boring pelvic floor exercises, you learn about them in pregnancy, find out you should've been doing them your whole life, and are told you have to do them til you fall off your perch.
Same with mindfulness. Boring but useful!

All's going well with me, had an early scan today due to some bleeding, our little baked bean is in the right place and has a heartbeat! All is well. Phew.

DS has been to pre-school three times now and is loving it! No crying, just having fun. Phew again!

A friend of mine has been Shredding seriously for a few months and has been v strict with snacks etc and her shape has completely changed, she looks great. Lots of weight loss, face shape changed, now has a waist - it really works.
She only Shreds a couple of times a week now, but the difference is amazing.

Pumble Tue 17-Sep-13 19:56:08

So pleased all went well with you scan *LTT& - what a relief. How many weeks are you now? Great news about DS and pre school too - how is it having time to yourself?

I don't think shred is doing much - especially as I'm eating so badly at the moment (pretty much don't manage anything until the evening) but the endophins are helping.

I will seriously think about ADs - or at least going to the GP about it.

Bingo went well. I did enjoy being told my children are spoilt (with material goods)....given how I didn't go back to work properly as we decided we'd rather have less money and me at home, I'm not sure how we would be able to spoil them but hey ho! Also, that we should leave the restaurant before they started causing chaos, even though they had been impeccably behaved up until that point - grrr. Thankfully they got bored of us after two and a half hours (we met at a halfway point) so that was good. And we keep telling P1 how lovely it was so they can't say we tell her they are horrible. And, I could NEVER leave the pumblettes unattended with the in laws.

A glass of wine is calling....unfortunately having two pumblettes with streaming colds, everytime I get near to the fridge, I'm needed again....!!

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 17-Sep-13 20:44:27

You sound much better today Pumble.

Please eat when the Pumbles eat, share their lunch and sit down and eat with them, evenif it at stupid o clock. I had lunch at 11.30 on school days last year,if I didn't, I wouldn't eat a proper lunch on my own - didn't want to prepare yet another meal. eating with them might slow down thatartof the day for you too, a short time to recharge your batteries.

I think there is a universal rule, anyone older than you, and related to you, is compelled at some point, (and most likely very regularly) to say, "I can't believe how many toys they have" "don't they have a lot" or some such thing. I think it is a compulsion.

V pleased to hear littlelongtail, has settled in to preschool and news of scan too.

LongTailedTit Tue 17-Sep-13 21:14:39

A mere 7+2 according to the scan lady! I feel much more relaxed about it now, happy to wait for the 12/13wk scan. I didn't think I was worried until the scan was over and I realised I wasn't any more.

Haven't managed to have any time to myself yet, but planning to loaf about in a coffee shop with a mag for the duration on Thursday!

I think it would be a v good idea to discuss ADs with your GP, there are many different types available, I had one BF-friendly type, my neighbour had a different BF-friendly one, my mum and sis have had Citalopram in the past (DM very anti ADs but accepted help when she realised she was struggling), it didn't suit DM so she chose to stop entirely rather than try a different type. There are so many options. My doc told me they like to prescribe them for 4-6 months, but she had a monthly review apt with me.

Very glad you managed the ILs without wanting to throw them out of the window - well done! thanks

Pumble Thu 19-Sep-13 14:19:14

Hope you have enjoyed your coffee today ltt

Snuggled on the sofa under a blanket with p1. Think I might doze off! Both pumblettes sooo full of cold so trying to encourage p1 to have quiet time whilst p2 sleeps! Plus it's grim outside-cold, dark and wet!!

LongTailedTit Fri 20-Sep-13 09:36:07

Morning!
I didn't get my quiet time in the end, had to dash home and do boring crap like laundry etc, but never mind, one day I'll manage it!

You've reminded me, must get our blankets out again - sofa snuggles are the way forward! That and stew.

How're you feeling today?
It's nice and sunny here today, hope it's the same with you. xx

magimedi Fri 20-Sep-13 16:11:18

Hallo all. Have been away from internet for 3 weeks & am just catching up.

So sorry to hear about the bad times, Pumble. I think you should have a chat to your GP about ADs - I was on citralopram for nearly a year & it helped by taking away my anxiety while I learnt methods of coping with it. I came off it gradually & can now cope pretty well. I feel that not taking them would have been a bit like trying to heal a broken arm without having it in a plaster cast. The arm would have healed, eventually, but the cast helps it to do so faster & more easily.

And please try to eat during the day - even if it's just a yogurt or quick sarnie. Having low blood sugar will not help your mood. Nag over grin

So pleased all is OK with the scan LTT - when are you due?

I really need to shred & loose some weight - since I quit smoking 11 months ago (stealth boast) & moved to an ecig I reckon I've put on about 10lbs. It has to go asap. Please nag me!

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 21-Sep-13 23:09:55

Hello hello <waves>

Pumble, are you ok? You've gone quiet.

Just come back from a party we were both looking forward to going to, but my babysitter forgot to come, so after an hour or so looking for alternatives, I went alone.

Full of cold too, so back home about to go to bed and give DH a big big cuddle. I missed him beng there tonight, and its the first house party we've been to in a long time.

Pumble Sun 22-Sep-13 00:18:40

Hello back. Am I ok? I'm just not sure if that makes sense.

Hope you had a great time away magi.

Hope you had a good cuddle with your DH row and cold is long gone soon.

Just feeling a little hmmmmm if that makes sense?

Pumble Mon 23-Sep-13 11:11:50

I just lost it with p1. I need all this to stop now please hmm

magimedi Mon 23-Sep-13 11:37:51

We all lose it at times with them, Pumble.

I remember when DS was about 3 shouting at him & dumping him very firmly in his room on his bed - so firmly it was almost like throwing him onto his bed. They do know exactly which buttons to press at times & not one of us is perfect.

Have a cuppa & something to eat - now!!

Pumble Mon 23-Sep-13 12:41:22

Having a cup of tea which is making life seem a bit better.

We all sorted the bathroom cupboards together and life a little calmer but feel so guilty for being so so awful.

magimedi Mon 23-Sep-13 13:15:07

Stop feeling guilty. She won't remember it all by the time she's your age.

Can you go out to the park or something for a good breath of air this afternoon? It's lovely here - hope it's the same with you.

magimedi Mon 23-Sep-13 13:16:05

PS Have you eaten?? If not, please do so - low blood sugar is not going to help you.

If I was nearer I'd be bringing you yummy food parcels! grin

Pumble Mon 23-Sep-13 15:06:55

I had a chocolate and some cucumber....does that count?!

I'm off to work later but having a gentle sit down with p1 whilst p2 sleeps. I know she won't remember-but I do hmm

magimedi Mon 23-Sep-13 17:11:09

Choc & cuce is better than nothing but................... I don't want to nag.

Are you back at work on a regular basis now? Am I right in thinking you are a teacher?

Pumble Tue 24-Sep-13 09:34:39

Today Will be a better day.....

Am sort of back at work-I'm a freelance music teacher so can pick ad choose. Currently just an hour a week. P1 doesn't like it though-she had her face pushed up against the door as I left yesterday saying 'mummy don't go'!

LongTailedTit Tue 24-Sep-13 10:28:50

Morning Pumble, yes, today IS a better day!

Keep deleting what I type, can't seem to form a useful sentence. Gah.
The point I think I was after, is that you have to think like a fish, keep moving forward and you will survive, if you stop and wallow you drown. Does that make sense?
No matter how shit a day has been, there is no benefit to you or the Ps wallowing in it, you have to move on and deal with each day as it comes.
Also, what makes one day hard often doesn't apply the next day - children have bad patches, growth spurts, angelic phases. We have low patches, energy bursts, etc etc.

But yes, feed yourself better please! Even if you just make double of whatever P1 is having, a Petit Filous and a cheese sandwich is better than a slice of cucumber and a piece of chocolate! grin

I'm loving the fog today, DS and I stopped to look at all the cobwebs that were sparkling in the hedge - nice start to the day.
The sun will be out this afternoon.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Sep-13 11:31:39

Yesterday was yesterday, today is all new. We all beat ourselves up for how we've acted sometimes, but as longtailedtit says, you have to move on. You feel bad for it, so accept that feeling and then send it away.

Have a nice lunch with the pumblettes (I fancy beans in toast today if that suits you I can heat some for you too).

Then, do some lovely things, away from home. stomp through the woods, take a trip to the library, a run in the park, anything.

And if you keep thinking back, then make yourself think of 3 nice moments from yesterday. Your snuggle sounds like one.

Pumble Tue 24-Sep-13 14:05:49

Turns out today is not a better day and it feels like I'm back to square one at the moment. I know I'm must be damaging the girls but I can't stop. P1 has had massive wee regression which isn't helping at all and I'm sure that's all my fault, especially as I haven't always coped well with it.

I have at least phoned mr p and told him I'm nt coping so I suppose that something.

Thank you for being here

LongTailedTit Tue 24-Sep-13 15:10:59

Definitely a good thing to share this with Mr P. Will he be home at a reasonable hour?

Can you call the docs and book an apt for discussing ADs? That would be a good thing, it doesn't mean it's necessarily the right choice for you, but I do think you should discuss it with your doc.

brew & cake

Pumble Tue 24-Sep-13 15:35:10

He'll be home very soon which is good. I keep thinking that if I just for some sleep things would be better-insomnia is killing me!!

magimedi Tue 24-Sep-13 16:14:29

Pumble, sweetie, I think you really do need to see your GP - I think I'm right in remembering there is one you get on with well?

You need a bit of help here & there's no shame in admitting & taking it.

We're all here for you.

(((XXX)))

LongTailedTit Tue 24-Sep-13 16:17:25

For a while I went to bed straight after DS, and I still do maybe once a fortnight, or whenever I feel the need. It feels a bit weird the first few times, but it helps. Maybe do that tonight?

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Sep-13 19:18:56

I agree with ^^ these two.

You have felt like this before, and each time you feel like this, you manage to climb back up.

Well done speaking to your DH, even though he is in the same house, it doesn't mean he realises the with of of feelings on any day unless you talk to him. Now he knows, tell him what he can do to help, a hug, a rest, a sounding board, whatever it is. Talk to your doctor too, for some options and some encouragement.

You will feel better. Remember the tools you can use to help yourself cope on the tougher days - sleep, and yes, that does mean bed straight after the children, regular food, some time outside every day for a bit of exercise, or even the shred (still not tried it!). And, some company in the day from somewhere. pop to the neighbours, arrange a playdate.

The doctor can help what you need to do on top of that.

Don't worry about the girls, my mum had PND and anxiety for a long time. if you asked me for my pre 5 year old memories are, I'd say the walk home from playgroup (my neighbour and I would hide in the same place from our parents and delight in it) and getting my fisher price school. No memories of any of mums illness.

Now I'm going to plump up those pillows so you get a good night sleep and get you a cup of cocoa. You get your jammies on.

thanks

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Sep-13 19:23:19

Depth, not with

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Sep-13 19:44:46

brew. Ready. It's got marshmallows too.

magimedi Tue 24-Sep-13 20:03:05

Early night sounds right.

Please, please, dear Pumble try to eat a wee bit better. It's a real starting place for you to get well again.

Cucumber & cheese.

Hoummus & toast or veg.

Open a tin of tuna & sarnie it with some mayo.

Apple & cheese.

Eggs! Eggs are great.

Porridge - you can make it in the microwave.

Yogurt.

I know you know all of this but I can't help being an older Mum & a bit of a nag!

(((xxx)))

Pumble Tue 24-Sep-13 20:15:46

Right, pumblettes asleep and mr p cooked me a proper meal for supper (after encouraging a piece of toast and marmite when the pumblettes had tea) so I shall be off to bed very shortly in the hope of some sleep.

This hot chocolate with marshmallows you have made row please tell me it's real hot chocolate and not the healthy stuff I sometimes have made with water!

I will try to get a good nights sleep and try to make a plan etc in the morning.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Sep-13 20:22:03

Yes, it Is even made with the dc's full fat milk wink

Sounds like you have a plan for the morning. Make sure you pick something from magimedi menu to unchanged on while you do it.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Sep-13 20:24:21

Oh, and good Mr P for cooking. He was spot on before too when you reached out to him. I'm off to make him a hot choc but if he (and you) want a dram of rum or whiskey adding, just ring the service bell. I'll bring it over.

magimedi Wed 25-Sep-13 10:14:01

How are you this morning, Pumble?

Thick, thick mist her today which doesn't look like clearing but still very warm.
#
Am feeling saintly & virtuous as have just changed our bed & hoovered the stairs. That is more than enough housework for one day, if not a week!

Pumble Wed 25-Sep-13 19:03:32

Hot chocolate was fabulous row thank you!

Had a much better day today - I know it's only one day but at least it was a good one. I went to an RHS garden to meet up with an old friend and her daughter which was lovely. It was really good to have a break from normality and get out of the house etc. Plus, you will all be pleased to hear that it meant that I had a proper lunch of hearty soup!

It is oddly warm though, once the thick fog disappears - I'm never quite sure what to dress myself or the pumblettes in!

That's surely enough housework for at least a week magi ?!

Off to choir tonight - exhuasted but will be good to get out the house.

How are you all?

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 25-Sep-13 20:41:53

You are welcome!

Glad you had a bettere day, and lunch!

"It was really good to have a break from normality and get out of the house" - how often to you get out each week Pumble? Can you try and plan so that you not in the house for two days on a trot - you are meeting someone, going to playgroup, to the park, to anywhere. Then, you have something to look forward to on a harder day, and something to think back on.

I am recovering from a cold, but otherwise ok.

Pumble Thu 26-Sep-13 11:55:14

Oh pants-just realised there's a piece of paper in with the washing....! The word muppet springs to mind....

magimedi Thu 26-Sep-13 12:25:16

Paper's not too bad - it's tissues (I am looking at you, DH ) in a dark wash that are killers.

Pumble Thu 26-Sep-13 12:52:53

It seems ok smile. I remember once leaving a tissue in the washing web at university and tumbling the clothes without noticing.... Not good!

Pumble Fri 27-Sep-13 21:06:04

We have had three ok days - they have obviously had their ups and downs but Mr P would agree that things seem a bit better.

The pumblettes and I make sure that we go out of the house every day - I would go totally stir crazy other wise. But I think what was good about Wednesday was getting totally out of the house for the whole day rather than being in and out if that makes sense. Also, we do quite a lot on our own and even when we go to groups, I do often find them quite lonely places whereas on Wednesday I was with a friend.

Mr P filmed P1 doing the warm up of shred with me this week - It is unbelievably comical but very sweet! Her squats and sit ups are getting rather too good for my liking....! I do wish that she would stop shouting 'that's like mummy does at home' when we do things at gym club etc - it's rather embarassing!!

Happy weekend though everyone - thank goodness it's Friday!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 27-Sep-13 21:18:51

Woo hoo to the 3 good days.

Groups can be lonely places until you get to know people. It's hard to strike up a conversation. I've found them lonely at times, but now have some good friends through them, often from seeing them at more than one venue - it gave me a reason to strike up a conversation.

Right, you have spurred me on, I am shredding tomorrow!

Pumble Fri 27-Sep-13 21:25:22

I'm thinking of trying to do it twice a day row so there must be something about it... (or I'm mad....)!

magimedi Fri 27-Sep-13 22:22:04

£ good days is wonderful!

I spent quite a lot of the afternoon in the garden & am not going to be shredding - my back feels shredded enough already. Squats & sit ups are certainly for the under 40's.

I am growing old dis gracefully. grin

magimedi Fri 27-Sep-13 22:22:28

*3 not £ - but ££££££££££ days would be OK!

Pumble Sun 29-Sep-13 01:22:44

Four ok days smile

Did you shred row ?

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 29-Sep-13 07:30:30

smile that is good.

Well, I did shred - got past the warm up, and then felt compelled to find some jobs to do instead ..... Sit ups are definately for the under 40's. I might try the warm up again today, and graduate to the actual programme in a year or two. wink

What have you got planned for today?

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 29-Sep-13 21:43:43

My DH has just announced his Christmas wish list. Wellies. And nice pants. Pissed myself laughing.

Pumble Sun 29-Sep-13 22:03:30

That's brilliant row do thank him for making me smile grin what are 'nice' pants?!!

Five ok days smile. Oddly worried about mr P going to work tomorrow but we WILL be ok.

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 29-Sep-13 22:16:44

I don't know if I want to know! I was too busy laughing to ask for more details. Need more wine first!

DH has just looked over and asked what are you doing? He knows I have shared his news. At least I didn't post it as a thread on AIBU. grin

Are you worried the run will end? No reason for it to. Have a lovely breakfast, plan lunch, and get out before or after lunch. Is it Mondays you work? You will be fine.

magimedi Sun 29-Sep-13 22:30:50

Hooray for 5 days.

Let's hope it's six.

I announced my Christmas wish list today - a decent watering can with a proper rose. SO I have some sympathy with your DH. row.

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 30-Sep-13 12:52:37

That's a good idea.idea. I was eyeing up my MILs metal watering can yesterday. My plastic one has sprung a leak!

How's longtailedtit?

Pumble Mon 30-Sep-13 14:04:22

I'm always disappointed with the rose on my watering cans. (Should we be worried we are discussing watering cans wink?!)

magimedi Mon 30-Sep-13 19:54:04

You need a flat oval rose, not a round one.

I worked in nurseries, lovely plant ones, not child ones, for years. A good rose is amazing - especially if you get into propagation - of plants -

Oh the scope for double entendres!

This is what I want for Christmas & am sending the link to DH!!

www.haws.co.uk/products/metal_cans_for_outdoors/3-5litre_long_reach_can.html

He's going to faint when he sees the price - but over 20 years it's a bargain!

LongTailedTit Mon 30-Sep-13 20:19:17

Evening all!
I like all this watering can chat, v civilised! My Haws has a rubbish round rose that I've misplaced, I hadn't thought of trying an oval one. Geeeeenius.

Five good days Pumble, whoop whoop! thanks wine cake

Feeling grim here, I look ridiculously pregnant but am only 9 weeks. Full of gas and water retention, eurgh! I could pass for 5 months gone, easily.
I've just been moping around and whingeing to DH, I know I didn't feel this bad last time! And every time I say that to anyone, they always, without fail, say "It's a girl then". confused

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 30-Sep-13 22:13:42

Evening. Loving the Haws can, just like the MIL's. Can we do a bulk deal? wink

Hang on in there longtailedtit,.

magimedi Mon 30-Sep-13 22:34:33

Sorry to hear about the bloat, LTT.

Just to cheer you I am waaaaay beyond the age of even a miracle baby & when I came home from my hols my neighbour (& good mate) asked if I was up the duff as French bread had upset me so much I looked 6 months gone. Try a couple of days of no bread.

Pumble Mon 30-Sep-13 22:56:47

Six good days grin

A bulk buy seems a great idea!!

I do so enjoy the 'its definitely a girl/boy' thing.... wink Sorry about bloating though- no bright ideas from me I'm afraid. The thing is that last time you weren't running after a small person all day either so bound to be that much harder.

Now you've sorted our watering cans magi any other necessities we should have for our gardening? smile

magimedi Tue 01-Oct-13 07:48:05

A decent pair of secateurs. And cut properly with them when pruning anything. For roses (& everything else ) a sloping cut just above & facing away from a bud. This means water will not constantly drip off the cut on to the bud & wreck it.

Felco are the rolls royce of secateurs. I have had mine for 20+ years. I keep them by my side more carefully than any PFB. They have been back for a service once (£15). They are amazing & I would have them before anything else in the garden, watering can included).

www.worldoffelco.co.uk/?gclid=CKay6smE9bkCFU_HtAodB0QAaw

Six days is amazing - crossing fingers for a week.

I am going shopping for a new waterproof jacket today. Old one is now v old & no longer does its job. I hate shopping, so wish me luck.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 01-Oct-13 07:59:58

Six days yey!

Waterproof jacket eh? I bought one last week to replace my faithful lightweight one (the heavier one was too hot for the school run). I felt brave so tried on bright pink and a lovely stranger turned round and said buy it, so I did! I love it. Do they do a bright pink watering can?

Have you had your wedding celebrations yet Magi?

Pumble Tue 01-Oct-13 22:43:17

Seven good days grin

Pumble Tue 01-Oct-13 22:44:44

How did the jacket hunt go magi any luck?

What a great thing for a stranger to say row too.

magimedi Tue 01-Oct-13 22:48:00

SEVEN GOOD DAYS!!!!!!

cake wine cake wine cake wine

That's a whole week!!!!!!!

Yippee doo dah day!!!

Got jacket - sadly it's black (my unfavourite colour) but was in sale & fits well & it lightweight & breatheable & totally practical so all is OK.

LongTailedTit Wed 02-Oct-13 12:38:19

Seven good days is FAB, I hope we're onto the eighth.

Glad everyone's got their waterproofs sorted, I bought a Didriksons coat after MN persuaded me last year, hoping it'll still fit me over the winter, I might need to make some kind of bump extension panel...

We're in holiday countdown here, off for a week on Friday, so making lists and figuring out what/who we can fit in the car. DH is off work already, so hopefully his body alarm will have slowed down by then - he was up at 6 this morning! V uncivilised.

Did you get an appointment with the Doc about ADs in the end Pumble? How do you feel about the idea?

magimedi Mon 07-Oct-13 08:17:22

How are things, Pumble & everyone?

Really misty here this morning, but blue sky & sunny above so am hoping it will clear to a nice day. I'm loving this warm spell - cheats a bit off winter.

Pumble Mon 07-Oct-13 14:32:58

Hi all

We are doing ok. Very much taking one day at a time (sometimes one hour) but getting through each day with some smiles. Pumblette 1 and 2 have started really making each other laugh which makes it all worth it.

I'm still shredding...gone back to the start with heavier weights and I AM going running this evening when pumblettes are in bed....it's been ages so I'm very very nervous but now I've told you I have to go!!

Not gone to the GP again yet although I'm definitely thinking about it.

It's a beautiful afternoon here - hope it is with you all too. smile

Pumble Mon 07-Oct-13 19:43:56

And 2.6 mile run complete grin. It was utterly wonderful. Coming back to a screaming pumblette2 less so!

magimedi Tue 08-Oct-13 11:40:09

Just wonderful, Pumble - love the idea of one day or one hour at a time.

Thrilled to hear you are back to running - you shame me!

Yet another lovely day here, hope it is with everyone else as well.

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 09-Oct-13 10:53:28

Glad you enjoyed the run Pumble.

I've been making the most of the weather too. I have cut down some decorative firs that have outgrown their welcome in the garden. The tallest was my height. Two were either side of a cherry tree and looked ridiculous. So, I now need to decide what to put either side of the cherry tree. I want something long flowering, that won't grow more than 1 metre. I'm thinking scented roses (though in my last garden I concluded I didn't suit roses too well, I don't think I prune well enough as they looked really straggly), or fuschia. Any ideas anyone?

<Off to rest aching limbs>

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 15-Oct-13 19:49:26

The sun has shone today, how is everyone?

magimedi Tue 15-Oct-13 22:21:33

I am fine - but might kill DH if he snores again tonight! He woke me up with ZZZZZZZZ THREE times last night. angry

magimedi Wed 16-Oct-13 10:51:47

Morning! DH is still alive grin

Slept right through last night so am in a much better mood!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 16-Oct-13 11:25:16

Phew, I'd been listening out for news on the radio of a man killed in his sleep mid snore. wink

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 18-Oct-13 20:19:01

Hey Pumble, how are you doing? Got some warm brownies to tempt you.

magimedi Mon 28-Oct-13 19:49:33

Waving at all of you - had more than a week of v.v.v bad internet connection - AND IT STILL ISN'T AS IT SHOULD BE!!!

I am ashamed of the rages I have had .............. I can not believe how isolated I feel with out the internet, despite having gone to the library to catch up a couple of times. blush

Survived the storm - awake for the majority of last night & trees & fences all down around us but walking along the sea front today was just amazing.

Look forward to hearing how you are all doing.

magimedi Tue 29-Oct-13 19:39:20

B U M P!!

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 29-Oct-13 21:23:23

Bumpety bump.

<waves back>

All ok here, No real news. Wish I could see the sea envy but enjoying the heart of England instead.

Come on girls. How are the rest of you doing?

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 01-Nov-13 19:29:13

Hey Pumble. How are you? Don't forget how well you've done. Any tough times can be beaten, you have the proof if that.

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 02-Nov-13 15:43:19

Of that. Yellow, hope weekends aren't too blustery and chilly. Looking forward to fireworks night here.

magimedi Sat 02-Nov-13 23:13:48

Just checking in.

Am so caught up with my missing friend Carol -

(http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/1899869-Carol-Sheridan-Missing-Gransnet-Member-French-Alps-2nd-thread-KEEP-BUMPING?msgid=42711651 )

that I have not had a moment to look at other threads. Sorry.

Hope you are OK, Pumble.

And don't want you to think that my concern for Carol is in any way diminishing my concern for you and your probs.

Am v tired - hope you get the right gist of what I am saying.

(((xxx)))

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 03-Nov-13 10:46:16

Morning. Remember your friends are thinking of you. Hope you are feeling ok and that your lovely DH cooks a tasty meal for you today

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 05-Nov-13 16:11:04

<waves>

brew

cake

magimedi Sat 09-Nov-13 10:33:43

Morning!

Just had a massive thunderstorm here. Delaying the inevitable housework!

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 12-Nov-13 22:14:58

Evening! Did you get your housework done in the end magi?

Mine is building up, after a couple of weeks of someone or another being ill. I'm going to walk runs the huse with my eyes shut.

Building up for Birthday party planning and Christmas now too.

magimedi Wed 13-Nov-13 10:37:10

Housework? Yes, I probably did but it needs doing again! Never berluddy ending!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 13-Nov-13 13:08:35

Very berluddy true. Like that word! I'm going to stoically ignore mine today and catch up tomorrow. The sun is shining and outside is calling.

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 23-Nov-13 21:41:33

A glass of wine, and a takeaway curry. Not a bad Saturday night.

Pumble Thu 28-Nov-13 20:23:30

I FOUND YOU AGAIN! needs a leaps for joy picture

I lost you a long time ago and assumed that the thread had been deleted for some reason and I just couldn't face starting another one! I am so relieved to have found that's not the case and it's still here.

Well, life has definitely had its ups and downs but we are all doing ok. P2 is now one whole year old, which I can't believe, and it was a bit challenging reliving the way she entered the world, but we are doing ok. I have actually had a couple of days in the past few weeks where it's got to bedtime and I have felt 'normal' if that makes sense. There have been some very dark days too but its been so long since I had 'normal' days at all so this is amazing! I can't praise the parts of the trial I'm doing that involve me watching interacting with P2 - it's made such a difference. P1 has her moments but we're ok too - and she and P1 have such a great relationship. I particularly enjoyed our car journey home today... I asked P1 what she thought reindeer liked to eat and she suggested rabbits and polar bears and then laughed hysterically for five minutes, with P2 laughing along just because P1 was happy!

And tonight I put the girls to bed on my own with no tears, tantrums or cross words from them or me!!!

How are you? I've missed you lots.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 29-Nov-13 13:13:04

Up blue, hello! <waves madly>

It sounds like overall things are going well. it's good to read all your news. I don't have time to chat now, but its lovely to hear from you again. I will come back later. smile

magimedi Fri 29-Nov-13 13:29:44

HOORAY!!!

We woz worried about you!! Didn't like to PM in case things were dire but so pleased to hear they are not.

Like row I should have been out the door five mins ago - but will be back later to catch up!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 29-Nov-13 14:31:12

Up blue? Should be hello Pumble! I was in a hurry! Off out again but will talk tonight.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 29-Nov-13 22:19:21

Hi Pumble. It is so lovely to hear from you again. I never knew Reindeer were carnivores. We've got some reindeer food for Christmas Eve, I'm going to have to buy some chops from the butcher instead as I'd hate to disappoint Rudolph.

So pleased the videos are making a big difference to you. it sounds like your little ones are really starting to bond. Each month as they get older, they will find more things they can do together, and it is lovely seeing the relationship grow and tough as anything when they row over the silliest of things and you become UN ambassador. Glad too to hear some evenings are feeling so different from months ago.

I can't think of any news from here. I've been upto loads of stuff and I am shattered. All well though.

How is the build up to Christmas going?

Pumble Sun 01-Dec-13 13:48:54

Not just any chops from the butchers row they need to be polar bear chops!!! And why does Father Christmas want rabbit pie in this house too?!!

Discovered the best reason for running again today. P1 is having a small and furry day and so going out for a run gave me some much needed peace!!

Hope you're all enjoying a good weekend smile

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 05-Dec-13 14:27:01

Hope you're not going out running today Pumble, the wind would blow you straight back home!

Pumble Thu 12-Dec-13 22:10:13

It's fine that I'm not organised for Christmas yes?! It's still a way off isn't it?!!

How are things with you all? I did two bedtimes without mr p this week and one was unexpected so feeling pretty proud of myself. The pumblettes and I are definitely making progress grin

Pumble Fri 13-Dec-13 18:48:08

Turns out no matter how well you think you're doing, you're never far from an almighty crash.... hmm

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 13-Dec-13 19:22:47

Of course it's fine! All adds to the atmosphere and build up!

All ok here. Pretty tired and ready for the weekend.

Pumble Fri 13-Dec-13 21:18:35

Well, now the crash is abating, I have to say that the memory of pumblette 1 saying 'please get up mummy' as I sat on the floor with my head in my hands sobbing is enough to make me snap out of it and try my hardest to never let it happen again. I just lost it and couldn't cope again, made all the worse as I had been feeling so much more back to normal. I am just hoping and praying that p1 and I can be ok again. I know it's easy to say they forget but unfortunately with p1 that isn't entirely true. I'm not sure this makes sense but needed to write hmm

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 13-Dec-13 22:54:30

So sorry Pumble, I didn't pick up on the crash in your last post. Please try not to be disheartened. The contrast between good days and crashes will make the crashes seem bigger. Can I just ask, though, the timescales between crash and abatement, are they getting shorter? It sounds like you are improving to me.

P1 loves you, as does P2. Talk to your DH. He has been there for you before. Talk it through.

Say more here goofy you want.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 13-Dec-13 22:55:12

So sorry, goofy shouldered on here. Bloody auto correct. Grrrrrrrrr

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 13-Dec-13 23:00:23

Ok, and shouldered was auto correct changing should be.

So what I was trying to say is, say more on here if you want.

Pumble Sat 14-Dec-13 08:13:30

I quite like the fact autocorrect made goofy make an appearance on the thread!!

You're right, the time between crash and normality is so much smaller than it was, I think it was such a shock to have such a big crash I suppose.

Listening to the pumblettes saying good morning to mr p as they have just woken and they seem happy little bunnies and im off for a long run in a bit to clear my head so hopefully today will bd a better day and we can try to put tomorrow behind us.

Hope you have a good Saturday smile

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 14-Dec-13 10:54:43

Running can be good for the soul. I suppose I could go now, instead of eating chocolate animals....

It will feel like a shock, but you are managing and recovering so much better, and moving on from each blip well from the sound of your posts. After your run, enjoy the rest of your weekend.

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 21-Dec-13 01:14:45

How's your weekend so far?

Pumble Sun 22-Dec-13 20:16:37

Crap crap and crap. Utterly miserable. Waiting for scary test results. Poorly pumblettes who won't sleep. Critical mother. All in all life is brilliant.

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 22-Dec-13 22:22:32

Oh dear Pumble. That does sound miserable. Do you want to talk? When will the results come through? You must be stressed and very tired. Take one thing at a time. Hopefully poorly pumblettes will get over their illnesses and return to good sleep at night. Hopefully whoever the scary test results are for will come back with the news you want to hear.

You know what though? You may not feel it tonight, but you are strong. You've dealt with so much this year, you can draw on that strength.

Pumble Sun 22-Dec-13 23:19:37

Sorry row you caught me at my low point...

Test results are looking at cancer amongst other things and only mr p knows which is hard work...

The pumblettes are now sleeping. We got pumblette 2 up in the end, she 'helped' wrap presents and then went back to bed... Visited the in laws today which is always grim and hasn't helped.

I was thinking back to this time last year and am amazed how different life is, thanks in no small part to this thread and you.

Going to try to sleep now I think.

Hope you're having a more restful time...I guess your dd1 has broken up for the holidays now?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 23-Dec-13 18:31:39

Oh dear. I will think of you ver the next few days, even if I am visiting less often.

Life is so different because of you. You may have been helped on the way by family and friends in real life and on here, but it is down to you.

DD1 has finished and shattered so I'm pleased we have had a quiet weekend.

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 23-Dec-13 21:20:29

How has today been Pumble? What are your plans for tomorrow?

Pumble Tue 24-Dec-13 00:39:04

Today has been ok. I've put my head down and just cooked! Might not be the most useful thing ever but it keeps me occupied and the pumblettes loved decorating biscuits with glittery icing. ( well p1 did, p2 just wanted to stick her hands in the icing!).

My brother arrives from overseas tomo which will be lovely. The doctor was hoping to have my results tomo which I'm really hoping for as it would be good to at least know something, good or bad.

Christmas Eve is one of my favourite days and I'm so pleased the pumblettes are old enough to join in this year so fingers crossed for a happy day.

Hope you have a lovely Christmas Eve too smile

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Dec-13 08:29:14

Happy Christmas Eve! I love it too. I hope the glittery biscuits go down well.i love the anticipation in the air, going for a walk, and watching Christmas tv.

Will you be cooking tomorrow for the Pumblettes and your brother?

I hope you get good news today with your results. It must be scary. Fingers crossed.

magimedi Tue 24-Dec-13 15:02:19

So sorry to hear about the crashes & scary waiting-for-test-results.

I am sure that Pumblette 1 won't be badly affected by seeing you crash. If you were to ask her in five years time I'd make a large bet that she won't remember it. And if she did, well it's not that harmful for children to see that their parents are human & fallible.

I was also thinking what a long, long way you've come since last year - it's great to hear you sounding so much better now.

I am having a quiet Christmas Eve as we have been away & got home at 6am this morning - journey from hell as ended up at Birmingham instead of Gatwick due to the weather. But am fine now & we had a lovely break with some sunshine in Tenerrife.

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Dec-13 19:02:22

Pumble, I hope you have had a good day with the Pumblettes and your brother, and had good news from your doctor.

I have just put mine to bed, we will see how well they go to sleep!

Welcome back from your hols Magi.

Thinking of you.

magimedi Tue 24-Dec-13 19:59:38

Happy Christmas, Pumble, the Pumblettes & Mr P.

And to you too rowrow - I sort of miss those long, tired 24/12 nights!!

Hope you all have a really relaxed & chilled day tomorrow!

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Dec-13 21:13:31

Happy Christmas to all the Pumbles and to Magimedi.

Have a peaceful, magical day.

Pumble Wed 25-Dec-13 00:56:15

I wrote a long reply earlier and it's not here now hmm.

Should be asleep but wanted to wish you a happy Christmas and to say results were inconclusive so scan and more tests after Christmas but it could have been much more negative.

We are all ok. P1 is super excited so up v early I expect. Hope you have super super days grin

Pumble Sat 28-Dec-13 21:05:36

Hope you've had a lovely Christmas.

Just feeling a little small and furry so saying hello smile

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 28-Dec-13 22:29:30

Hello!

How was your Christmas? Mine was good. For some reason I have been incredibly tired and the girls still are, but we've had a lovely time. We need to go through the house now and have a good clear out.

I hope you get a date for your scan soon, and they do all the investigations quickly for you.

By the way, is feeling small and furry good, or did you get a furby for Christmas?

Pumble Sat 28-Dec-13 23:18:37

Glad you had a good time. The plumblettes are exhausted too-think it must be the extra stimulation.

Small and furry is such a normal phrase in our family, I forget it isn't in common parlance! I guess it's feeling a little down and in need of hugs, but with no obvious reason why if that makes sense. And a bit like a hedgehog curled up in a ball.

First quietish day tomorrow (although still at my mum and dads) which I hope will do us all good - had 14 extra family members over today!

rowrowrowtheboat Sun 29-Dec-13 07:25:53

That is a good way of describing it. I felt a little like that on Friday.

I hope with a quiter day, you can get some hugs from the Pumblettes. Can you and DH go for a little walk, just the two of you as you are still at your parents? It's hard being in someone else's home with children to keep entertained, even when it's your own parents. I end up keeping everyone else happy and putting myself last.

What have been the favourite gifts this year? A marble run has been the best thing in this house,

I'm sitting amongst two protesting daughters because I'm making a break from cbeebies for just one morning and they do not approve! I'm trying to make a point of tv not always beng their choice. DD1 has flounced.

Pumble Sun 29-Dec-13 12:47:45

Hope all flouncing has ended now row!

The train track is definitely the best present in this house. So much so very little else has been opened as they're so engrossed!

An afternoon just the four of us as parents taking my aged granny back home. Thinking of curling up on the sofa with them and watching happy feetgrin

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 30-Dec-13 20:51:53

Happy feet is cool. Flouncing has ended, and we may start to be feeling a little more rested.

My two like the train tracks too, they had a little one a couple of years ago.

Have you heard from longtailedtit recently? Is she ok?

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 01-Jan-14 10:34:38

Happy New Year! May 2014 be good for you.

magimedi Thu 02-Jan-14 14:43:45

Happy New Year.

Christmas was quiet for us & DH's brother & new wife (No 3 !!!!) came for NYE. We had a lovely dinner, cooked by DH, wine a plenty & were all asleep soon after 11pm!!

The joy of not having to go out or stay up for New Year.

LTT - I've seen her posting quite a lot elsewhere.

Hope all goes well for everyone in 2014 & hope you get those tests don3e asap, Pumble.

Pumble Thu 02-Jan-14 22:03:25

Happy New Year!

Hope you have all had a good start to 2014.

We are back home now but not quite back to normal as mr P not back to work until Monday. Its lovely he's working from home but I fear next week will be quite a shock to the system for the plumblettes and me! We have definitely all benefitted from some quiet days though.

I had a scan thus afternoon which ruled out some nastiness and found a cyst and possibly PCOS but unfortunately there are more tests to be done to find out what is properly wrong. I'm looking on the positive that it ruled out some cancers which is such a relief but I wish all the tests could be over.

Must try to get some sleep smile

Pumble Sun 05-Jan-14 22:17:53

Evening all smile

Feeling a little nervous as mr P back to work properly tomorrow so the first day just me and the plumblettes since 19th December.... My rational brain says we are going to be fine....the irrational brain says it will be a disaster hmm

Hope your Dd has a good first day back row

magimedi Mon 06-Jan-14 13:49:12

Wondered how you were, Pumble.

Hope it is going well & you are not totally rained in & stuck inside.

I cheer up once January comes as the days are slowly getting lighter & all the best bit of the year is ahead now.

Pumble Mon 06-Jan-14 22:03:50

We all survived and all survived well I think.

Plus I have finished plumblette 1's jumper - the first I have ever knitted! Need to sort out lose ends but other than that, feeling pretty chuffed.

So a good day! How was yours?

magimedi Mon 06-Jan-14 22:38:20

Mine was good. Thank you!

There was light in the sky (to a trained eye !!) at 5pm. And we had a lovely walk with no rain.

It really is the little things like that that I cling on to to stop the black dog descending.

I am super impressed by all this knitting - I can't even remember how to cast on.

Will be coming to you for lessons if there is a sniff of a DGC anytime!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 08-Jan-14 14:40:15

Hi Pumble and Magi.

Pleased to hear Monday was good. How is it mid week? We have started well,but today was more challenging to get up and out!

I'm trying to spend less time on here as I'm not getting my knitting done at all (well, by not coming to MN I have a got a lot further this week, but still not enough)

Very much need to do a January house clearance too. Beware, anything that is still long enough gets put away or thrown away!

magimedi Wed 08-Jan-14 17:29:23

"If in doubt - chuck it out". Has always been my motto! But we did have 15 moves in 25 years so I am really good about clutter!

Am feeling very saintly today as joined the local uni gym so that I can keep my NY resolution to swim at least twice a week. It look lovely & is only £80 for 4 months. And if I keep it going & take out an annual membership it's only £140 pa!!!

Please feel free to nag me to go - it makes my back so much better & makes me feel much chirpier generally.

Sorry to hear getting up & out was a challenge, row - hope tomorrow is better.

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 08-Jan-14 18:07:48

Wow, a move every two years or less. I don't know how you do that! My inclination is f in doubt keep, so I will try and switch the other way.

Swimming sounds good, and a steal of a price. Go tomorrow!

I miss swimming but don't go often enough for gym membership, but I should get to our local pool.

My new years resolution is to be 'mindful' at least once a day. I've not done a course, but I can stop and appreciate the clouds in the sky or wind in my hair, or the sound of my girls playing and just remind myself it's the small things that make me happy.

magimedi Wed 08-Jan-14 19:50:24

It wasn't every two years - just sometimes it was 5 times in 3 years!!

Love the idea of being 'mindful' - it is certainly the little things that matter.

Don't forget CDWM next week!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 17-Jan-14 20:30:52

Magi, that's still loads of times! Hats off to you!

Hey Pumble! How are you? Have you had a old week? I hope you are alright.

magimedi Sat 18-Jan-14 23:04:16

Just popping by to see how you all are.

I'm OK - had a sort of sub virus the last two days & feel e bit meh - but reckon I've shrugged it off now.

Pumble Sun 19-Jan-14 22:43:39

Just saying hi. Had a funny time-hope to be able to post more tomorrow.

Sorry you have been below par magi. Hope the new week leads to the end of it.

Hope all good with you row

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 22-Jan-14 09:52:23

Sorry you've had a funny time Pumble. Hope the results are coming back with good news.

Magi, I hope you once again on full par.

I'm still on my house clearance mode. Trying to sort and clean. One daughter has a sparkling room with no junk in it any more, just the rest of the house to go.

Feeling tired today after a broken nights sleep, so after the lovely cup of tea i'm now drinking, I'm going into to room 2 with a big bin bag and feather duster!

Anyone else want a tea?

Pumble Wed 22-Jan-14 12:27:18

Just a little milk in my tea please rowsmile

Can you declutter here too?! wink

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 22-Jan-14 13:19:42

There you go Pumble brew

Time for another mini break!

Pumble Wed 22-Jan-14 22:23:37

I got side tracked by duplo building....! I'm not sure who enjoyed it more but I was rather proud of my efforts (especially the zoo!)

How is the decluttering? Any progress?

I think part of the funny time is due to the ongoing tests but also my cbt ended and it's odd thinking I've lost that help if that makes sense? I've got another couple of sessions in June but it's still a bit odd. I think I quite valued the couple of hours each session to talk/think/get perspective!

I've decided I need to get out more as knitted another jumper for p1 and irs taken just over a week.....

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 23-Jan-14 12:07:08

Duplo is good fun.

It will feel funny. You're going through uncertainty with the tests and you're moving to a new phase now CBT has finished. You valued that time, so can you somehow replicate a part of it? Could the childcare arrangements continue so you have an hour of walking and thinking? Could you find a group of people to meet up with that in time could act as a sounding board?

Keep a list of the most valuable exercises and do them.

I'm impressed with the speed of knitting! I'm back onto a toy as I now have matching hats for the little ones.

De cluttering is going well. My jumpers and trousers were done yesterday. Just got to edge them off the floor and into a charity bag now.

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 06-Feb-14 12:12:31

How's life Pumble? Are you using the CBT? Are you still knitting, or are you in a duplo zoo trying to find the penguins? (I have to see the penguins whenever I go to the zoo)

Just had a lovely walk in the park because it is NOT NOT NOT raining. It's starting raining now we are home though, shock, I yearn for a rain free day!

magimedi Thu 06-Feb-14 14:19:10

Also checking in! Just been out & got soaked to the skin in a 200yard walk back to the car - umbrella no use in the wind. Bored to tears with all this rain & am not even in a bad area like SW.

Love the thought of P in the zoo!!!

magimedi Tue 11-Feb-14 07:43:57

Hallo! It's rainig - just for a change. We are OK here & no risk of flooding but I wondered how you all are?

Hope you haven't got cabin fever from being in so much.

magimedi Sat 15-Feb-14 20:20:16

Hallo! I have wine & just wondering how you al are?

You've all gone far too quiet for my liking!

magimedi Sat 15-Feb-14 20:20:35

all are - fat fingers!

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 15-Feb-14 20:31:45

Hello! I'm good thanks. At my parents for the first time in months, and have two very excited girls pleased to be here. We have, over the next few days, the best weather in months for the south west apparently so I'm looking forward to being blown about but not necessarily rained on.

Life has been busy as I've been getting more involved in a few things in the evenings, and I'm trying to keep offline when the girls are around as it won't be long before both are at school,som visiting here less often.

Still thinking of my MN friends though, what's the latest?

magimedi Sat 15-Feb-14 20:36:06

My latest is that I have kept my NY resolution of swimming 3 times a week & am nearly up to swimming 40 lengths (I K) per swim! It's not even a stealth boast, I am ridiculously excited by it!

And I swim at my local uni pool & on Wednesdays I have to walk past all the top mens' hockey team!! Phew!!! How I manage to swim after that excitement........

Did you get the job??

Wold love to hear from Pumble.

magimedi Sat 15-Feb-14 20:36:54

Meant to say I hope you are having a lovely break with your parents & that the sun shines for you.

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 15-Feb-14 20:51:36

Phew! It sounds like you have a little incentive to swim! Well done!

I am failing at taking a moment each day, and feel busier than ever. I also need to do more exercise, now I'm the wrong size of 40, the waist is starting to expand whereas before it didn't care what I ate! Zumba or Pilates will start after half term, we'll see if that makes a difference.

How is Pumble?

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 01-Mar-14 22:10:30

Evening! How are we doing?

magimedi Sun 02-Mar-14 19:43:51

Am doing fine!

Pumble - we'd love to hear from you - don't be shy - if it's all awful we are still here for you, lovely woman.

Would just like to know that you have not vanished into the ether!

How's the Zumba/Pilates, Row ?

magimedi Sat 08-Mar-14 22:26:18

Waving - not drowning.

Row? How are you

Pumble - would love to hear you are OK

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 08-Mar-14 23:23:36

Waving back!

Sorry, I've been in meetings two evenings this week, and out Friday and Saturday! Most unusual.

I have not hauled myself to Zumba yet blush and not started Pilates as it may clash with swimming lessons for me! Bit rubbish really.

Pumble, you ok?

magimedi Wed 02-Apr-14 10:44:17

Waves!

Pumble Wed 02-Apr-14 13:17:04

Thanks for waving magi. It means I have found you again!

I must improve my understanding of how to work mumsnet - perhaps then I wouldn't lose you!!

Hope all good. Impressed and a little jealous of your swimming (and the men's hockey team!). Ridiculously I run past a rugby club and yet never see any rugby players-must timetable my runs better! Running has definitely even my lifeline -that time out helps so much. Up to 11 miles now.

Things are up and dwin but going through a bad down time. Not helped by mr p disappearing around the world at short notice - thankfully he's home now. Because i did my cbt as part of a trial it means that my cbt man is still on the phone/email and so have had a couple of phone calls which has helped I think.

The plumblettes are growing too fast! P1 has just had her birthday and got her first bike-taking to cycling like a duck to water! She suggested she could cycle with me whilst i run(I didn't like to tell her that that was my time out!!). Just like her sister P2 has come up with her own sung language to communicate with us-who needs words?!

Just wanted to say hi smile

magimedi Wed 02-Apr-14 13:26:44

What you need to do is click on the "Watch this thread" button at the bottom of the last post on the thread.

When you want to find it again - just click on I'm watching at the top of any page & you'll find us!

You may be impressed by my swimming but I am stunned by your running. So pleased you have got back into that.

Glad you have got your cbt man for help - am assuming you are not on any meds?

Just love the idea of the sung language - they'll be stars yet!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 02-Apr-14 22:36:06

Hi!

Lovely to hear from you. 11miles gains much respect. Sorry you are going through a bad time. Hopefully it won't last long and you can use some of the techniques CBT has taught you.

Come tell us what else you have been up to.

I STILL haven't zumba'd or ran, or anything. Shame on me. I have been getting more involved in the PA and various committees so I feel busy, and that i've got a few things to juggle. It's quite novel to feel like that again.

Pumble Thu 03-Apr-14 19:02:05

It must be nice in a strange way to gave things to juggle again row!

I am doing my first recording for ages this coming week - I'm utterly terrified! Three days with people I don't really know, three days where I will hardly see the pumblettes (and having to miss a bedtime which will be interesting as p2 still has a bf at bedtime...) but something I couldn't turn down and need to do! It's scary to do something totally as me though and not as 'mother to pumblettes'! I need to check out the music but when I try p1 either says 'don't sing mummy' or joins in...

What else have I been up to? Hmmmm. Lots of running! Have also discovered I can take both pumblettes swimming at once which is great and p2 loves it so much which is good as she has barely been!

P1 asked for a jumper for her birthday but that had to be put on hold as I slammed my finger in the hinge of am old Victorian door-what a muppet!

What's all your news?

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 03-Apr-14 20:41:51

Wow, how exciting to be singing and recording! I too woud be terrified, but i think i would feel fabulous once I did it! Problem is, although I like singing, and think I can, in truth, I wonder if I actually sign terribly out of tune....

Hope your finger gets better soon, if it is swollen, keep it high as much as you can to speed the swelling going down. Just rest you hand on your shoulder when you're sitting down.

My news? I've joined a PA, I like organising though, it has been the essence of a lot of jobs I've had, so it shouldn't be too bad. I'm in school when my youngest is in pre school to get some experince and make sure that working in schools is what I want to do when I go back to school. I LOVE it. Love working with the children and helping them learn and progress, love feeling part of a team again, love the atmosphere in the school. When DD2 is in school full time, I can see this as my career. The girls who are growing fast. We are camping at Easter, for the first time ever, Wish us luck!

magimedi Thu 03-Apr-14 22:32:12

I just hope the waether is kind to you, row.

My camping days are over - enjoyed it (ish) when I did it but happy not to do it again. Back & hip too dicky for sleeping on hard ground.

Where are you going?

Pumble - I am in awe of you singing & recording! I am the most unmusical person I know - can't read a note, never played an instrument, think I am pretty tone deaf but I love to sing.

When I have the house to myself I belt out the numbers! grin

What do you sing? Would you like to come & give me lessons?

Pumble Fri 04-Apr-14 19:11:48

So pleased you're enjoying being in a school environment. How exciting! Lots to look forward to then row?

I would love any camping tips-it's never been my thing but we have been invited camping thus summer with old university friends and in the spirit of trying to do more things think we might say yes....!

My mum thinks 11miles isn't that far to run... Although this someone who gas never run herself!

Always available for singing lessons magi!! Mostly sing classical but this recording is jazz inspired. Still can't get my head around being away from the pumblettes so much but it will be fine. Concert tomo too so lots of singing days ahead.

What are your weekend plans?

Pumble Fri 04-Apr-14 19:12:43

PS forgot to say I spoke to my cbt man today which was interesting. Lots to ponder. How to stop being so black and white-grey has never been easy for me to find!

magimedi Fri 04-Apr-14 20:13:56

Oh, Pumble - I used to be so black & white & have now accepted grey -with colour running through it from time to time.

Just hold on to the good times, even if they are just moments, & let them bring some colour to your grey. Life is very ordinary with some great times in between - hold on to them.

This weekend I will be mostly trying to find a cheap flight to Turkey for the end of May/early June & cleaning the house!

Now DH & I are retired we tend to do all the boring stuff at w/e & leave the weekdays free for going out.

So, the inside of all the windows need cleaning & bed changing & utterly amazing stuff like that.

11 miles is A M A Z I N G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your mum comes from a different planet!! grin

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 04-Apr-14 21:52:17

Camping tips? I'll tell you after Easter. The closest I've got to camping so far is Eurocamp with everything provided, so we will be on a steep learning curve! I will report back.

11 miles is seriously good running. Unless it takes you 8 hours to do it, I'm seriously impressed.

Magi as ever says the right thing.

DH is very black and white and gets frustrated with my more shifting sands approach to many things in life.. Spaghetti bolognese is a classic example, he thinks his way of cooking it is RIGHT and my way is WRONG. I think both of us cook a nice bolognese, both are right, but different from each other. We can both be right, it isn't a case of life being on a flip of a coin with one right side and one wrong. My coin is often still falling through the air, DH's is always sitting on the back of his hand, waiting to be uncovered to reveal heads or tails.

Weekend plans? Buying some camping equipment and digging in the garden. And catching up with piles of washing, heaps of dust and never ending trails of things not put away....

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 04-Apr-14 21:54:15

PS, I'm going to beautiful Cornwall. May head to the New Forest later in the year.

I could also do with singing tips. The jazz feel sounds like it will be great fun.

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 04-Apr-14 21:56:16

Magi, I've just looked back, waving, not drowning, is that in reference to a poem?

magimedi Fri 04-Apr-14 22:25:59

Can't remember my reference to 'waving not drowning@ - but it is a poem I know:

Not Waving but Drowning

Nobody heard him, the dead man,
But still he lay moaning:
I was much further out than you thought
And not waving but drowning.

Poor chap, he always loved larking
And now he's dead
It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,
They said.

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always
(Still the dead one lay moaning)
I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.

Stevie Smith

Sorry if that is too much of a downer for anyone. But it's still an amazing poem.

Does DH enjoy your spag bol, Row?

"*We can both be right, it isn't a case of life being on a flip of a coin with one right side and one wrong. My coin is often still falling through the air, DH's is always sitting on the back of his hand, waiting to be uncovered to reveal heads or tails."*

That is one of the best pieces of prose I've read for a long time - it sums up marriage so well.

Enjoy the w/e, all of you, even the battle with dust!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 04-Apr-14 22:48:37

Magi, that is the poem the waving reminded me of. I like that it makes you think twice about what you see. It's not always what you think. Like when someone you know almost blanks you in the street and you wonder what you have done to upset them, and then you later learn they just had bad news and couldn't bear to stop and talk, or fantastic news and were completely wrapped up in their thoughts.

I got annoyed recently in a cafe as music came on, louder than normal background music, and it made it harder for me to hear. I was deep in conversation with a friend. My friend later recognised the couple at the next table, and discovered a marriage proposal had just take place, hence the music. I little bit of magic had happened under our noses, and I'm a little disappointed I was unaware of the moment. So much of life we don't see, or see with our own little goggles on.

Thank you for your compliment. Marriage is wondrous thing is it not! For your information, we both think our own recipe is the best, my DD's, using the term dear loosely, have second helpings of DH's. who am I to judge?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 07-Apr-14 21:07:58

Soooooooo, how was the concert Pumble? how was your weekend?

Pumble Tue 08-Apr-14 16:09:00

Still mid recording but just saying hi! Will fill you in on life tomo smile

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 08-Apr-14 16:17:13

Hi!

magimedi Tue 08-Apr-14 17:38:47

Waves - most exciting, Pumble.

Really hope you are enjoying being yourself & not a Pumblette mum, if you see what I mean!

Pumble Wed 09-Apr-14 19:15:32

Hope you have both had the great sunshine we have had today. Great to be out in the warmth with the pumblettes. Hope all good with you.

Being pumble without the pumblettes I have to confess was fantastic! Don't get me wrong you know how much I love them but it was great to just be me! Three long days but great fun, v rewarding! Some good socialising too with a curry after one session. Really good to be out not discussing children! Pumblette 2 survived without me at bedtime but apparently was clearly missing that feed-she seemed pleased to have it back last night! I am hopeful it will all lead to more stuff-it was just so good and I was on such a high. I'm just so pleased I forced myself to do it! (Plus I think it was good to see what life's like when you have them all day for mr P!).

Loved the coin tossing analogy row-so true smile

Pumble Wed 09-Apr-14 19:17:38

It was also amazing to have hot cups of tea, breaks in the day and to go to the loo without toddlers!!! Everyone else said how exhausting it was but I said it was quite a break compared to normal. The composer who has thee children said he could totally see how it was a break!! grin

magimedi Wed 09-Apr-14 22:21:34

YAY!! Sounds great.

Never forget that you are a person as well as a mother & it is so important for your DCs to see you as a person as well. I know how much they need you, but having children is a long, slow process of letting them go.

As we have got a bit poetic here I'll quote my favourite poem about having children:

On Children
Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

I hope that lots more recordings (& curries grin ) come your way, Pumble & that you enjoy life as you, just you, as well as being mother to those lovely Pumblettes!

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 10-Apr-14 12:02:22

Sounds fabulous Pumble. Really invigorating for the soul. Really pleased for you and I too hope there are more to come.

The poem is quite thought provoking, I'm going to read it a few more times as each read through reveals a little more (or I'm a little slow today!)

Pumble Thu 10-Apr-14 19:15:07

That is a fabulous poem magi - agree with row it needs multiple readings.

I know you're right about me needing to be me as well as the pumblettes mum and I'm so pleased I am beginning to realise it. I think that the recording is the best thing I have done in a long time.

Hope you're enjoying the sunshine. smile

magimedi Thu 10-Apr-14 22:19:13

I am so pleased you have realised how good the recording was for you!

My DS is nearly 33 - I've been reading that poem for many a year & it took me many readings to really take in the sense of it.

The sunshine here has been wonderful & this spring seems, to me, to be one of the best ever - might just have something to do with what a shite winter it's been grin

Pumble Fri 11-Apr-14 15:51:41

Had a phone call with cbt man today and he seemed genuinely speechless at how different I was feeling due to the recording! So much so that I haven't got any phone calls booked until our next face to dace session at the end if may. I can phone if I need but I actually feel positive at 'going it alone'.

Must dash as supposed to be packing....not packing, house in chaos and been out all day so far....

In laws tomo too-sure that will be a delight....

Happy Friday smile

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 11-Apr-14 21:04:44

So pleased with this positive feeling. Will there be more opportunities to record stuff?

Packing eh? Hope you've got most of it done now.

I'm writing a list f stuff to take camping while DH assembles the roof bars. I have got tent, poles, pegs and sleeping bags so far. Could be a late night.....

Hope the Pumbles enjoy their visitors tomorrow.

Pumble Sun 13-Apr-14 08:21:19

A beautiful sunny morning here-hope it is with you.

Mr P and. I went out for a quick drink last night and realised it was the first time we had gone out just us since P1 was born.... It was lovely and think we should do it more. (Although I was amazed how prices had increased-how sad am I?!!!)

In laws were ok although they told us P2 was definitely still a work in progress with lots of work still to do..... I was not impressed!

Happy Sunday

magimedi Mon 14-Apr-14 10:11:15

Just nod politely at in laws & let it wash over you! (easier said than done, I know).

Very important tha you & Mr P get out together more often. Believe it or not, one day the Pumblettes wil leave home (on their world band tour grin ) & it will be just you two together. It is vital to spend time being asults & not just Mummy & Daddy!

Pumble Sat 19-Apr-14 20:14:52

Waving hello smile

Exhausting week emptying the family holiday home with my parents. The pumblettes had been great but equally exhausted and a little unsettled.

Pumble Sun 20-Apr-14 23:32:11

Happy Easter.

Kick up the bottom required please! Off back home tomo night and feeling fearful of it just being the pumblettes and me again whilst mr P at work and the loneliness that brings. I know it's pathetic hence the need for that kick!!

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 21-Apr-14 08:45:57

<kick>

It is not pathetic. The P's will need to adapt to being back at home and being in the normal routine. Mine take a couple of days to get back to the right bedtimes and stuff. So, I plan, if I think a tough day is ahead, I try and get a play date, or get a day out sorted with or without friends. it doesn't have to cost money. For me, days out take away some of the trigger points for moans or whinges.

Can you get a play date set up, or get some craft activities planned, especially for the first day back so that you feel good at the end of the day?

Try not to be fearful and take each moment as it comes.

Keep posting.

magimedi Tue 22-Apr-14 16:40:15

Good advice from row. A bit of adult company always helps.

And I second the 'keep posting'.

Pumble Tue 22-Apr-14 21:19:45

We spent the day with friends today which was good but p1 not well hmm. I thought she wasn't right earlier and by tea time she was still not eating and fell asleep on mr p at tea whilst I was out teaching (new pupil though which is good smile). Raging temperature and not at all right-I'm hoping life will be better in the morning. Haven't any plans tomo because of p1 but fingers crossed all will be well.

Have you been camping yet row?

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 22-Apr-14 21:26:49

Ah, get well soon P1. Hope your night isn't too tiring. Glad you spent the day with friends. A lazy day of tv/ books/ craft/dolls tea party/just being might be in order tomorrow then.

Camping was a success, in that we are all happy to go again! We managed to put the tent up and down again without falling out, which we were both impressed with (we often have different views on methods remember), and the girls loved it. Sleeping was fine, campsite friendly, and we felt like we had a break. It was very cold at night, but we soon learnt to wrap up.

magimedi Tue 22-Apr-14 22:27:08

Hope P1 is better tomorrow. Hopefully raging temp wil have burnt things out.

HOORAY for new pupil - sounds like you are getting a bit of outside life back!

So pleased your camping went well - it's a long time since I slept under canvas (thank the lord!).

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 26-Apr-14 09:16:14

How was the rest of your week Pumble?

Pumble Sun 27-Apr-14 21:41:00

Hi. We had a good week in the end. A friend came to stay which was nice and broke up the week nicely!

Having that Sunday evening feeling now but know deep down we will be ok. Wish I could work out how we could make some new friends though...

Realised it's only four weeks until my sponsored run for meningitis. It's only 10km so know it will be fine but will be emotional thinking back to how life was immediately post meningitis.

Mr P and Ihave decided we need a night away and so are going to leave the pumblettes with my mum and dad who they love love love! And the best bit-I actually want to. Not in a running away thing but just because I want to if that makes sense?!

Hope you have had good weekends

Ps apologies if there is a negative post from me tomorrow morning looking at the week ahead....!

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 29-Apr-14 20:00:40

Hope this week is also good.

Good news But a good last week, and a night away to look forward to. Marvellous!

The run is not a bad distance at all. It must have been really traumatic going through meningitis. I remember one of the Ps beng poorly a while back.

Wondering how to make friends? Here are some ways I have found my friends in the last few years
Hobby - craft nights
Mother and baby group that was very friendly, though I did have to g a few times, as I am shy until I know people. I also find it easier if I see people in more than one group, so music classes and toddler groups. Gives me something to talk about.
Running buddy, though I can't talk for the first 20 minutes!!
Pre school / school run - wang at the gates.

Dot forget your old friends though!

Good luck with the run.

Pumble Tue 06-May-14 17:44:47

Just in case it all goes awry a at bedtime I just want to say the pumblettes and I have had a really lovely day just the three of us grin.

I think it's good to have it written down so I don't forget it!!!

Hope you are good too smile

magimedi Wed 07-May-14 15:57:13

Hooray for lovely days!

And there is no reason why it should go awry at bedtime - think positive.

I am well, still swimming & frantically out in the garden whenever I can. It's not big but I love pottering round. I worked in nurseries (plant type) for 6/7 years & am never happier than when mucking around with plants.

Weather lovely, but a real gale blowing - talk about" rough winds shaking the darling buds of may" - it looks as if there have been 20+ weddings, all with confetti over my front garden, from all the hawthorn blossom that's flying around.

When are you & Mr P off for your romantic w/e??

Pumble Tue 20-May-14 20:40:28

Hellooo

How are you? Feeling so much more like my old self which is great and finding I am waking up looking forward not full of dread most days (although the mornings when I've had minimal sleep due to insomnia the old feeling is there but I'm beginning to realise that's due to insomnia not other things).

Penultimate session with cbt man today... Oddly burst into tears about friends I've lost through pnd which I wasn't expecting. He suggested I explain to people why I went AWOL... Not sure I'm strong enough for that....

We have been loving the good weather-so great to see the girls enjoying the sun and I've loved enjoying them

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 20-May-14 21:00:32

Hello! Lovely to hear you are looking forward.

To me, friendship is about the long haul. Some of my friendships go through fits and starts, where I don't see as much of them as I used to. I know they still think of me, and that they know I still think of them. We come together and drift away in cycles.

Don't mourn the loss of friendships if you want to keep some of them. You're AWOL period is small in the scheme of things. You can explain as much as you are comfortable with. Just say things have been tough, but you hope you can pick the friendship up again. Take action to rekindle them.

I always think we are so busy our own lives, it is hard to notice when someone has stuff going on, and then you leave it a while, and then think it has been too long. In reality, it isn't too long, and the other person is pleased to hear from you. See how the conversations go as to how much you you want to say.

If you were a real life friend of mine, I'd be relieved to hear from you, would be happy to carry on, and would welcome you back. Reach out, and believe in yourself.

Pumble Wed 21-May-14 15:19:11

Very wise words row

I have one friend who I am most confident about them being ok so I guess I start there....

magimedi Wed 21-May-14 16:02:06

Row speaks good sense.

Start with the one friend & see how it goes.

I am SO happy to hear that you feel like your old self again - that's wonderful.

Am not surprised you feel low after insomnia - lack of sleep always brings my anxiety problems back - but, as you say, you know that's the reason so you can cope with it better.

Are you still running? I've stuck yo my NY's resolution of swimming twice a week & in fact am now doing 1K 3 times a week. I don't weigh myself (no scales) but I have dropped a size in clothes!!!!!!!!!!! I am very chuffed (to put it mildly).

And your singing? Still getting out? Not feeling guilty? I've replied to your new thread in chat !

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 21-May-14 19:24:07

Good. Start there.

Have you enjoyed the day is sunshine again today? I'm hoping the world hasn't been too shocked by my day glow white legs!

magimedi Wed 21-May-14 19:42:08

My legs are also day glo white & would have been scarey hairy if I hadn't got the razor out!

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 21-May-14 19:52:31

Magi, fantastic that you are still swimming, and its made such an impact on you.

I managed to have some quiet time in the park by leaving early to pick up my youngest. It was so nice to sit on a bench and watch the world go by for a few minutes.

Pumble Wed 21-May-14 22:30:48

I just need to scream!! I'm fine but mr p is just winding me up-not his fault I'm just on edge I think!!

That's great about the swimming magi-v jealous! Yes, still running a lot-race in London on Sunday (obviously I will beat mo farah who us also running!!!) and doing ripped or shred every morning. The pumblettes are getting v good at it and use skittles for weights!!!!

It must have been lovely to watch the world go last in the sunshine row. We picnicked in the sun which was lovely.

Day glo white legs here too but not so hairy as I have this fear that if I fall/injure myself whilst running in shorts I don't want anyone to see my hairy legs!!!

magimedi Wed 21-May-14 22:44:50

DH's have a great habit of being the No 1 winder-uppers. Mine can still do that after nearly 30 years - but I do try (& don't always succeed) to let it wash over me. They are a different species, for sure!

Running a race that Mo farah is in!!!!!! Respect!! You must be speedy, as well as non hairy grin

Pumble Wed 21-May-14 23:00:07

It is amazing how they know just what to do to wind you up isn't it?!

Certainly not speedy....they let any tom, dick or Harry do it!! grin

P1 is so excited about coming to watch on a train and shouting 'run faster mummy run faster'!

magimedi Wed 21-May-14 23:11:00

Mind you - I can wind mine up quicker than he can me - but I am so wise & 'groan' up (DS's phrase) that I don't - often.

Run like the wind, Pumble - I'll be cyber shouting for you!

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 22-May-14 09:38:51

Run, Pumble, run!

There must be something in the air. It winds you up and grinds you down. Today and through the long weekend I am going to try to do what Magi does and let it go. And not growl. I'm very good at growling. Grrrrrrrrr.

Pumble Thu 22-May-14 12:28:37

I had forgotten it was a long weekend.....more scope for winding up then!!!

I just arranged to take the pumblettes to someone's house who we met at a group-v proud of myself! smile It may not be for a while but at least the date is in the diary!

MyGastIsFlabbered Mon 26-May-14 16:21:42

Rejoining this thread if that's ok, I'd lost it.

Feel like my MH is having a real 'flare up' at the moment for no reason. The kids aren't sleeping well but it's more than that. I just feel overloaded when the boys are about at the moment & just want to be by myself. I haven't even got dressed today yet. I'm supposed to go to band practice tonight, which I normally love, but I just can't summon up any enthusiasm.

Pumble Tue 27-May-14 21:20:43

All welcome here mygastisflabbered (but can we have a clue on name change?!)

Did you make it to band or have any time to yourself? I definitely find the fact the lows can just appear frustrating-how long has it been a low?

In other news-run completed on Sunday and desperate for another to beat my time (competitive, moi?!)! Dud have a day off yesterday but back on it today.

How was the bank holiday weekend? Did we all manage to not get too wound up by other halves wink?

MyGastIsFlabbered Wed 28-May-14 05:39:59

Sorry, forgot about name change! Was MrsHelsBels.

I made it to band & it was great. Think I'm just really tired, boys are waking up really early at the moment.

Pumble Wed 28-May-14 09:31:17

I thought it was you but thought I had better not make the assumption!

Crikey-based on the time of your post they are waking early. Hope you're managing early nights yourself.

Glad you made it to band. As I am beginning to realise (after too long!) it's rather good to get out and can make all the difference to mood.

Raining here again-deep joy!

Pumble Wed 28-May-14 15:08:19

Having a shitty day. Supposed to be going out tonight with friends but can't think of much worse at the moment. I just want to curl in a ball and cry instead. Can I cancel and do that instead?

Pumble Wed 28-May-14 23:21:20

I went. I almost cried but managed not to. Found out their opinions of the pumblettes which was an eye opener....

On the plus side both pumblettes had a nap earlier-unheard of!!

Pumble Sun 01-Jun-14 07:41:04

This insomnia is killing me. Always makes me so low first thing in the morning hmm

MyGastIsFlabbered Sun 01-Jun-14 11:27:18

I know how you feel Pumble, I'm exhausted too, I don't trust my feelings any more.

rowrowrowtheboat Wed 04-Jun-14 11:56:38

Hey Pumble. How are you? I'm glad you went out with your friends, but I hope it was a success, it sounds interesting. How's the insomnia now? Make sure you rest and have good breakfasts. I've visited my daughters pre school this morning, part of their rhyme is 'each day is different, every day is new'.

I'm looking forward to the next new day, hopefully one without rain.

Pumble Fri 06-Jun-14 19:13:43

Hi all. Feeling a bit funny-pumblette2 didn't have her bedtime breast feed this evening-she just snuggled up on the cushion fir cuddles and stories. I'm not sure if she will want it again on Sunday (away singing tomorrow evening) or if it's the end. I feel a bit lost which I know is silly. I just hadn't considered last night would be the last time....

Trying to look at each day as a new day... It's sort of working but insomnia still hard work!

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 06-Jun-14 19:25:44

Oh, I remember that feeling so well. I was so sad when I stopped with DD1. With DD2, it was a little bit different, as I was making it into this big thing, which was making me sad about it. I think it ended up being the last feed without it seeming so at the time. I Look back at that time with fond memories (though the fist few weeks with DD1 were not easy at all, I must have been determined to carry on!)

See how Sunday goes, your milk isn't going to disappear so you can feed if she wants it, and you want to keep going, and maybe she just didn't fancy it tonight, it has been a warm night.

Pumble Fri 06-Jun-14 19:33:08

I think that the fact it was so hard to start with (horrific mastitis etc) it became such a special thing with p2 that I persevered it's almost harder if that makes sense.

Glad it's not just me who finds it hard though row

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 07-Jun-14 00:29:33

I think I understand! I took it feed by feed by DD1 for the first six weeks, every feed was painful, I am scarred for life, but maybe because I also persevered, I enjoyed feeding so much after that, and I was really sad to let it go. It seems a lifetime ago now, and I'm glad I did it.

I did also enjoy the flexibility in the evenings when I finally dropped that feed, I didn't feel bad about missing out on either an event I wanted to go to (like a comedy night I skipped) or feel bad because the feed was missed that night. I sense of freedom in terms not having to be available at certain time slots.

Hope you are sleeping now.

Pumble Tue 10-Jun-14 14:15:22

I bumped into a neighbour today (who I only know to say hello to) and she has recently had her second child with a similar age gap to mine. She asked how I was always so together etc and made it look so easy....! How do I give people this perception?!! I did tell her it got easier and to yell if she wants anything etc. but I am amazed she thinks this when we all know this isn't the case!!

Pumble Sat 14-Jun-14 00:40:19

I'm just going to curl into a ball and stay there if that's ok. Today has been crap and I just want to hide. Sitting here with tears streaming down my face.

MyGastIsFlabbered Sat 14-Jun-14 07:05:13

Oh Pumble, big hugs for you. Wish I could say something useful but I've got nothing right now x

rowrowrowtheboat Sat 14-Jun-14 20:42:16

Oh dear Pumble. Your last post was lovely with your neighbours compliments. You must be doing a lot of things right.
How are you feeling today? Have you had a better day?

magimedi Sun 15-Jun-14 08:29:48

Sorry to hear yesterday was crap. Hope today is better . If you look back to your very original post (other thread) you'll see how far you have come, lovely Pumble.

Pumble Mon 16-Jun-14 13:42:25

Thank you. I know it was just a blip but it came so out of the blue I wasn't expecting it. The really good thing is that I did manage to find some positives in the day when I looked back on it which is something I would never have managed before so that is good.

We are back to pootling along now but it's a funny few weeks coming up so fingers crossed we all get through unscathed...!

Hope you are all ok. Are you getting anymore sleep mygastisflabbered?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 16-Jun-14 19:45:04

Glad to read your last post.

I've had a rubbish day, so I'm going to watch the Notebook. As I'm already over the edge today, I may as well watch something to get it out of my system!

Pumble Mon 16-Jun-14 23:04:42

Sorry you've had a rubbish day row

I do agree though-sometimes watching a film like that is just the answer to as you say get if all out your system.

Hope you're feeling a bit better now

Pumble Thu 19-Jun-14 01:55:07

Vomitting pumblette. 1 hmm

Pumblette 2 awake as they share a room and we have had copious changes of bed for pumblette 1 hmm

Pumble-feeling remarkably calm and in control (but this may be different in the morning ....!)

magimedi Thu 19-Jun-14 08:50:45

I hate vomit!

Hope the sun is shining with you, Pumble, P.1 is better and that you have a nice day. Don't try to do too much, snooze if you can.

Pumble Mon 23-Jun-14 10:35:20

Not PND related but feeling miserable. You know when you just can't take one more thing going wrong. It's just one thing after another and I can't take it anymore. It's just one shitty thing happening after another.

magimedi Mon 23-Jun-14 20:20:50

And BREATHE, dearest Pumble, breathe.

Shit happens & it always happens in multiplicity (is that a word?).

And it's tough & vile but you will come out on top.

I am your greatest advocate - look how far you have come & how amazing you are.

I hope things are better tomorrow - we are always here for you.

(((xxx)))

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 23-Jun-14 21:44:45

Lots of little things add up and up and feel like a great weight. It feels bad when they seem to keep coming, but as Magi says, that is what life is. I sometimes try and stop and think and wonder if a few things are eating away more than others. If I can resolve those, by moaning, talking, acting, resolving, then the others seem less heavy. I have to say, I had a good cry over a soppy film last week, and it did help greatly. I think I needed to let it all out.

Shity things happen, but they come in fits and starts. Go to bed early, and then knock them for six tomorrow with a good run, a heartfelt sing, a long-eye-shutting-smile-making-cuddle-with-the-pumbletts and ride the waves to calmer waters. Take it one step at a time, little surfs rather than the big waves will do.

magimedi Mon 23-Jun-14 22:11:49

Just love the idea of little surfs..............

row you express things so well.

(((XXX)))

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 23-Jun-14 22:18:11

I think the wine helps the writing. Just wish I could write some poetry, or childrens book, or big block buster. I'd love that, me, but need a year on a barely inhabited island to have a little thinking time to get the first page out, let alone anything else!

Right then, group huddle, to give Pumble strength, just don't get your feet wet, I'm standing on the edge of the sea with the tide lapping my ankles. wistful thinking

Pumble Tue 24-Jun-14 14:39:17

I think you would write a fabulous book row-you do express things so well. Love the idea of little waves.

Thank you for the group huddle smile. I think I was just feeling overwhelmed and sorry for myself. I went for a good run when I got in from work yesterday evening (despite it being the last thing I fancied in many ways) and it made life so much better. Annoyingly there has been a bit less running recently as it has just been so so hot.

Hope you are enjoying the sunshine

magimedi Tue 24-Jun-14 17:55:01

I think you need to try to set aside 15/20 mins a day & start writing, Row.

So pleased the run made you feel better, Pumble. I know if I'm anxious or pissed off a swim always helps, even if I don't feel like it. And they often end up being my best swims.

Very busy this week - appointments every day.................. with Wimbledon tennis grin

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Jun-14 20:20:31

You two put me to shame with the running and swimming. I need a kick to get going. Practised for a fun run a month ago and I felt worse after each run! I need to find something that is better suited, and involves minimal effort to get to. Maybe I need to get the rust off my bike and try that again.

Well done Pumble, glad the run helped. We all feel overwhelmed with things sometimes.

Magi, I bet you swim in the mornings now, just so you don't miss your tennis appointments!

Pumble Tue 24-Jun-14 21:51:39

It's weird-I think you either love or hate running. I have a friend who signed up to a 10k for charity (I'm keeping her company) and she can't get motivated to train and hates every second (and me for being so jolly about it!!). I, on the other hand have turned into a running bore, although I think that's partly as it's keeping me sane....well sort of sane wink

I hope nobody interrupts your very full appointment schedule magi...

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 24-Jun-14 22:03:31

Surely not a bore! Enjoy it. I always enjoyed the run(after the first 20 mins and I knew the end was in sight) with a cheerful running buddy so you will be perfect for motivating your friend.

I hope mygast is feeling ok.

magimedi Tue 24-Jun-14 22:28:20

I can be a swimming bore - it's often tough making myself go & making myself do the distance but the rewards are amazing.

This is how I aim to swim

Am nowhere near that fluidity but I try!

Pumble Wed 25-Jun-14 15:09:32

What a beautiful, fluid stroke that is. It looks so calm and yet very effective.

Supposed to be blitzing the house as in laws coming tomorrow but am snuggled with p1 instead. We tried to make a cake but ran out of eggs.... Could tidy when mr P comes home but dashing off for a quick run as although I'm feeling Knackered I need the head space before tomorrow (even if it will be a slow run).

magimedi Wed 25-Jun-14 22:33:00

Sod blitzing the house for the ILs - hope you had a great run.

magimedi Mon 30-Jun-14 22:26:01

Hallo!

Between swimming & tennis watching I haven't been here much.

How are you all?

Pumble Mon 30-Jun-14 22:41:19

Great minds magi. I just popped in to say hi!

Hope you're enjoying the tennis-I'm trying to get the pumblettes to like it but they're not convinced!

All ok here. Had a great day out with the pumblettes today-was super proud of them smile

I need a kick up the bottom to run though (doing lots of shred but not got out to run!) so going to try really hard to go first thing tomo morning as have a friend staying who will keep an eye on the pumblettes. My brother is flying in tomo and we are grabbing a coffee at the airport before he gets stuck into work until the weekend which will be brilliant (even if he will be Knackered) as haven't seem him since Christmas.

How's things row and mygastisflabbered?

magimedi Tue 01-Jul-14 08:38:22

Hope you got your run, Pumble.

Where I swim is part of the local uni & the years' price is amazing (£180) but the times are limited, so if I don't go I've missed it. It must be much easier to put off having a run & think you'll do it tomorrow - I know I'd do that with swimming if I could. And the other benefit is that it has become a routine now of the days & times I swim. So it's Friday (say), my swim time is 11am.

Have a lovely time with your bro - you must love him to meet at the airport!!

Pumble Tue 01-Jul-14 08:52:31

Grrrrr. The pumblettes both had a meltdown as I tried to go running. Had Mr P been at home I would have gone anyway but seemed mean leaving them like that with friend. Feeling really peed off.

Shall try later.....

Pumble Tue 01-Jul-14 10:36:01

Bribed the pumblettes with breakfast and let P1 choose my distance and got out for a run grin. Feel so much better and more in control. smile

rowrowrowtheboat Tue 01-Jul-14 21:18:42

Yay! You got your run! Excellent. Glad you squeezed it in and turned around the meltdown. Hope you enjoyed the catch up with your brother.

Magi, a routine sounds ideal. Are the games still going on on the route to the pool? Was it hockey?

Things are very busy here. I'm looking to enrol on a course at college, got PA stuff happening and grappling with the fact my beloved pre school era will be over (I'm not really sad, as I know the next stage will be a blast, but I've loved our local group and it will be sad to say goodbye to the workers). Oh, and we having work done in the house - that's creating just a few extra things to do!

magimedi Tue 01-Jul-14 22:02:31

You sound really busy, row

Sadly no hockey (aka fit men) as is uni hols!

So pleased you got your run in, Pumble.

Pumble Wed 09-Jul-14 17:22:35

Feeling v sorry for myself. Just fell over running-so badly mr P had to come and pick me up with the pumblettes. Sat here with ice on my ankle desperately hoping it's all ok. This is more important as supposed to e helping a friend do a 10k on Sunday. Positive healthy thoughts required please! And sorry for any moaning I do about it!

rowrowrowtheboat Thu 10-Jul-14 22:41:07

Positive thoughts zipping your way. How is it now?

Pumble Thu 10-Jul-14 23:43:12

Crap sad. It's so swollen and sore. Could barely walk this morning. Spent much of this evening in tears about it. Pathetic I know. Just feel so cross with myself fir doing it. And cross with uneven pavements.
Thank you for positive thoughts-keep them coming!!
How are you?

rowrowrowtheboat Fri 11-Jul-14 17:46:39

Oh dear. Hope you are keeping it up to help the swelling go down. Have you had it checked out? It's miserable to have that happen to you, especially when you have a run planned with a friend.

I'm ok. Busy busy and feeling run down after a nasty throat infection, and looking forward to sme time relaxing.

Here's some more positives vibes for your leg.....

Pumble Mon 14-Jul-14 19:08:25

Hope you're feeling better row and having a quieter time.

Ankle still poorly angry

I'm terrified at the moment, as about to see friend I haven't seen for months and am going to admit it's partly due to my pnd. I'm hoping she will be ok but scary nonetheless. (It's really good to have somewhere to write my fear-thanks for still being here).

Have your dd's finished for summer yet row?

rowrowrowtheboat Mon 14-Jul-14 20:42:00

Rest that ankle and keep it up! Things are quieter, for now. I have signed up for a TA course for Setember - a more gentle way into teaching, so at least I now know what I'll be doing in September. The work in the house is coming to an end, so we can start tidying up again.

Don't be scared about talking to your friend. I can understand it is hard to open up and talk about it, but if I were her, I'd want you to know that I understand it has been hard and that I'm there for you. You don't know what she will say, so just take it as it comes. She may be totally surprised, as PND may not evident even to friends. She may reflect on it for a few days while she thinks things a little more. However she is, you are the lovely Pumble who has gone a huge journey of strength and courage who sould old her head up high for how far you have come.

Have a great day with your friend tomorrow.

rowrowrowtheboat