How does this sound to you?

[OrmRenewed]

If you lived in a close-knit terraced street and have lived there for years. If you now refuse to talk to anyone in the street apart from one person because you think they are judging you and gossiping about you. You talk about everyone in really disrespectful and unkind terms - mocking their accents and use of words. You don't talk to anyone at school because 'you can't be bothered with it'. You won't take your new baby out of the house in case someone sees it. The curtains are always closed. So you and your partner can't leave the house together. Your mum has just been sectioned but you don't go to see her - you don't care.

I am worried about this person. Should I be?

[MitchyInge]

odd mix of paranoia, grandiosity and depression OR hands so full of own family troubles is withdrawing from everything else to focus exclusively on new baby in a completely healthy way?

[OrmRenewed]

Hmmm... this has been going on for a while bu the baby's birth seems to have triggered it more.

[MitchyInge]

there could be good reasons for not visiting her mum, can remember being in hospital for 6+ weeks before being up to visitors

can you make some friendly overture? presumably HV will be keeping an eye on her mental well-being

[OrmRenewed]

She told me she doesn't want to visit her mum. That's all. No reason given - not that she has to give me a reason. I was making friendly overtures - I am the only person in the street she will talk to.

[MitchyInge]

if warning bells are sounding in your mind then there is probably good reason for it, don't you think? are you wondering about whether to voice your concerns to her directly?

[OrmRenewed]

I don't know mitchy. I think she'd just shut me out too if I talked to her about it. What can I do if I am concerned?

[MitchyInge]

god I don't know (don't tell my mum I blasphemed) - just having a friend who doesn't pressure you about these things is incredibly valuable isn't it, someone to talk to about non-contentious stuff and just pass the time of day with

do you have coffee together and that sort of thing?

[OrmRenewed]

Yes but not often. Until she went on mat leave she was working full-time like me.

If I'm honest she makes me a bit nervous as she does seem quite volatile. But never as 'odd', for want of a better word, before.

[MitchyInge]

hope she is going to be ok

perhaps you could talk to her husband/partner if something happens to escalate your concerns?

[mrswarthog]

Can you call your local HV? They may 'drop in' for a chat/see if they can help - ours will do this in Liverpool if they think someone needs a bit of support without contacting social services.

[OrmRenewed]

Can I do that? I don't know which her HV is? Oh dear am just thinking that perhaps I should just mind my own business . I just wondered if her behaviour was odd enough to be a worry.

[mrswarthog]

I'd say (having been through it) it sounds like PND. Poor DH thought he would have to have me committed as I changed so much, refusing to go out & thinking everyone was talking about me. Then I decided that I would go out all the time so they couldn't talk about me about me & would regularly walk 15 miles to our next town without realising how I'd got there. I can't believe it now because it was all in my head & after this last pregnancy my HV (linked to GP surgery so easy to find) rang me a few times to check I was ok.

[OrmRenewed]

Thanks mrsw. That does sound similar. I wonder if anyone is keeping an eye on her from her GPs.