Sleeping problems & anxiety - is this PND?

[arcadia96]

I had a very long and traumatic birth experience followed by a week's stay in hospital with health concerns about my baby. I found it all very distressing and couldn't sleep properly in the hospital because of the birth, the health worries and the noisy/busy environment generally. Also a nurse said to me, just after the labour, that if I didn't sleep I wouldn't be able to look after my baby. That has triggered off fears in me and given me insomnia. We've now been home for six weeks, and I probably get a couple of hours sleep a night. In that time I have desperately sought help from various places and have been given all different advice which is confusing. Have been given sertraline by GP, don't know if it's helping or not (over four weeks taking it now). Tried temazepan a few nights, worked a bit but don't want to get dependant, and baby wakes me up in next room even if BF does the night feed. Don't feel depressed so much as very anxious that I won't be able to look after my baby properly due to lack of sleep and feel like I'm barely coping. I find it hard to interact with her as I'm so tired. BF getting impatient and wants me to get back to 'normal'. Also haven't recovered from the birth yet really as didn't get any rest afterwards. Was getting help from family but they are now withdrawing - life should be moving on by now. Thought I'd go mad through lack of sleep but haven't yet, just confused and anxious. Any similar experiences?

[lucyellensmumagain]

Yes, it most definately could be PND, you sound like me.

Firstly, you would be amazed at a mothers capacity to survive with very little sleep. But its so hard, i know. My PND was missed and as a consequence it took, is taking much longer to get sorted - there are other issues too. But was all brought to a head by PND.

I too had a traumatic birth and it played on my mind, i also had health concerns about my DD and i wouldnt let anyone see her for two weeks in case she died

I would talk to your HV as the first port of call, then your GP. They will probaby do a questionnaire to assess if you have PND. Mine definately manifested as anxiety so i know how you feel.

The upside to this is, there is help out there, lots of it - you might benefit from medication, especially as you have caught it early - it certainly helped me. Not sleeping tablets but medication for anxiety which of course interferes with sleeping.

Do please ask for professional help - dont suffer in silence.

It is frustrating for partners too - but honestly, i used to want to Kill my partner for saying "pull yourself together" -(i actually did try once ).

It is of course perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed and exhausted when you have a new baby. It might actually be a good thing though taht the family are stepping back now - it will help with your bonding with your baby.

Get help - you should be enjoying this special time.

[GetDownYouWillFall]

Hi arcadia, your story is also similar to mine. I had a traumatic birth and a 9 day hospital stay afterwards, during which time I had virtually NO sleep as it was so hot, noisy, busy etc. One night the HCA came in at 3am to take my BP and pulse!!! WHY?
I think this set a pattern in my head for insomnia. Even after my baby started sleeping at night, I began to find it harder and harder to sleep. I got the zopiclone, temazepam etc etc from the GP, but like you did not want to get dependent, and was worried about taking it in case I wasn't able to wake for my baby.
The anxiety set in and I found it very hard to leave the house.
The first few months I found it very difficult to talk to my baby - I think I was still really traumatised and in some kind of trance half the time.
I did end up in a mother and baby unit for 3 months but I think this was because I was not caught early enough. If I had been given the right help and right medication earlier on it would not have escalated in the way it did.
I urge you to get help straight away. Sleeping tablets aren't the answer in this case.

[arcadia96]

Thanks. I have asked for help but haven't been taken that seriously. The attitude is 'all new mums struggle and have lack of sleep, get on with it'! What medication helped you? I was given sertraline ADs but I think they overstimulate me and I've heard they cause insomnia.

[BeckyBendyLegs]

Arcadia let me tell you my story so far. I was the same as you. Went to the doctor practially on the the floor with sleep deprivation (same causes as you - could not sleep feeling pressure 'if I don't sleep I won't cope'). Was initially given diazepam. Had two more crap nights. Went back on the brink of dispair due to sleep deprivation. He gave me fluoxitine (sp) which is basically prozac and some sleeping pills. Went home, started taking ADs. Insomnia far, far worse! Other side effects didn't agree with me either. So stopped taking them. Sleep problems still there. Took heavy duty sleeping pills (zopiclone) for two weeks - worked fantastically! Yeah! Stopped taking them as I felt much, much better. Insomnia back. Started taking herbal tablets - worked pretty well. Tried to cut down. Insomnia back. That is where I am now. Last night I was so exhausted I took another zopiclone but now I feel guilty because they are addictive and can't be used for long term use. I'm sorry this isn't a help for you as such but I just wanted to say that I am in the same boat as you. There is a real thing called postnatal insomnia and it can be a sign of depression. I was diagnosed with mild PND because when I've had enough sleep, I am fine! It is a hard situation to be in. Good luck xxx I'm going to try hypnotherapy and also investigating homeopathy. I need an answer.

[arcadia96]

Hi, I've just read your two posts. Seems like we are in a similar situation. I can't solve your problem (or my own!) but have a few tips. Also I notice you say 'I feel guilty' about taking the pills ... and about your husband getting up in the night. Funny because I am feeling guilty similarly, but if you think about it, we shouldn't feel guilty at all because it isn't our fault! I wonder if that's part of the problem though, feeling guilty because it seems like a self-created problem because our own minds are causing it?
Anyway, a few tips as I am now having less trouble getting to sleep initially (still problem of waking up a lot and early though):
-if you have an alarm clock with a display move it away from the bed so you can't see it and resist temptation to look at it too.
-change the bedroom around a bit if you can to make it look different so you feel differently when you go to bed.
-When going to sleep tell yourself you will get up and do something if you are lying there for a long time. You won't want to get up so this might help - I've found I haven't had to get up so far but at least you know you won't be lying in the same place still awake in an hours time.
-Try and replace negative thoughts with positive ones repeated like a mantra 'I'm a good mum, I love my children, I am strong and healthy' etc.
-remember that mum's are designed to sleep lighter and that we can cope with less sleep (even though it feels terrible)
-accept that there isn't 'an answer' as such but that eventually you will learn to let go again, but explore different things that may help. If you do some relaxation or whatever it may not help immediately or that night but think of it as cumulative and so that time isn't wasted.

These are things that have helped me a bit but it's really not easy and I would love a quick solution but I think we will have to accept it is something to work at (or rather, let go of!).

[BeckyBendyLegs]

Hi arcadia, thanks for these tips. Sorry you are in the same boat but reassuring to know I am not going mental (ie other people have this too!). I do cover my alarm clock and I find it helps. My problem now is that I've had sleeping pills and have it in my mind that I can't sleep because I've got used to them. I stopped taking them over a week ago and have had herbal ones since. Last week I was doing really well and even got down to just a herbal cup of tea before bed one night! But then DS3 started having bad nights and I've got myself in a tiss again. It's a vicious circle hence why last night I took a proper sleeping pill after two crap nights. Yuck! Will try with herbals again from tonight. Hopeflly get down to nothing again and try hypnotherapy CD again. We'll get through this

[arcadia96]

I don't know, who am I to give advice?!, but I wouldn't worry too much about the herbals why not keep taking them for a while they won't harm you in the same way as the prescription ones (although I have found valerian, though it works, gives me nightmares!). Which ones do you take?
I was also just wondering as you already have two children if there was anything different about this pregnancy/birth for you?
For what it's worth you don't sound depressed to me, just a tired person! I used to feel rubbish after just one bad nights sleep which makes me laugh now.

[BeckyBendyLegs]

There is valerian in my herbal tablets - gives me nightmares too but at least I am asleep! I still feel rubbish after a bad night and even worse after two. My mum says that is my problem: she told me that I just have to accept sleep deprivation.

The only thing different about this pregnancy is that it took me two years to concieve, and I had one MC, so he was very long in coming and I soooo desperately wanted a baby. I think the reality of life with two children and a new baby, plus Christmas and all that, caused me to crash just after Christmas and this crash manifested itself in not being able to sleep. Also he was the most difficult labour (five hours and born back-to-back - most people would consider that not bad!). I had breast feeding problems also (but had that with others too).

At first I my sleeping issues started when I was just waking early, then I was anxious about getting enough sleep so unable to sleep AND waking early. I don't think I am depressed either. I simply cannot cope with lack of sleep. I'm my own worst enemy really. I wish you lots of luck getting yourself sorted. I'm sure we'll both be fine.

[TitcHt48]

Not sure how to start a new "thread" an old old age pensioner here who carnt sleep. Having been on sleeping pills for35 years now have NONE REALY struggling any suggestions x

[TitcHt48]

Help me to go to sleep after having used "sleeping pills" for 35years no longer can have them at the good old age of 70years x