What's wrong with me?

[SammyK]

I feel so shite. I am fat and spotty and my hair is greasy and my foot hurts. The house is a tip I have a mountain of laundry and DS is watching curious george for the third time this morning.

I know what I need to do so why don't I just do it? I'd hoped I could muddle on as I am but I can't.

I can't even look after myself properly. I printed out a tick chart today and it included 'brush teeth' and 'wash face'.

I feel like a failure.

[FluffyBunnyGoneBad]

You sound a little depressed. Have you been for a chat with your GP? There's just no motivation to get moving here is there? I really would pop and see your GP.

[allthetwinklystars]

If it's any consolation I am feeling fat and my hair too is greasy, I have a mountain of laundry, dd is watching cbeebies (I put it on 'for 5 minutes' er, quite a while ago), I'm not dressed, I haven't thought about lunch and neither my hair nor teeth are brushed. DD's teeth are though!

I'm in a good mood today though - just taking it easy. You sound like a mother to me - not all of us live in show homes or cope all the time. I see this as the equivalent of a duvet day. Which erm, this is too as I'm wrapped in one at the moment...

[allthetwinklystars]

Oh and my house is a tip of monstrous proportions.

[mankymummy]

We are staying in PJs all day and not going out. i havent brushed my teeth or hair and we are eating crackers and cheese for lunch on the sofa.

Go easy on yourself. we are all ALLOWED lazy days.

[SammyK]

I was on fluoxetine for a reay for anxiety and low level depression, came off it in November as I decided it was my life making me depressed and tablets couldn't change that.

I have/am making changes, my relationship is stronger and I have made a huge step in deciding to stop childminding and a starting a new nursery job in May and my DS who is autistic will go in with me when he is not in preschool.

I feel like this everyday.

DS or DP literally drag me out of bed and I have no motivation. I work very part time at the mo (not working right now) so that means I have to keep the house clean and tidy, if it weren't for that it would be terrbile.

JUst feel so crappy

[allthetwinklystars]

Oh SammyK, I hope this passes for you. Sometimes I think that working at home doesn't help as there's nowhere to escape to and you have to keep it tidy! Maybe the new job will make a difference on that point. And having a ds with autism is hard work. Sometimes when everything gets on top of me a just realise I have to let go and start over - start the day afresh and not worry about what I have or haven't done. Just go and do something nice with the kids.

[mankymummy]

sorry didnt mean to underestimate how you feel.

are there any things that make you happy? gardening, cooking, going for a walk, anything that might give you a bit of a lift?

[SammyK]

Eating makes me feel happy but I have no self control and a sweet tooth hence the weight and skin issues. I get into a viscious cycle there.

I like sunshine and being outdoors in it but dont drive and have poorly foot at mo so cant get far plus DS either bolts or struggles to find speed so would be a bit risky as I can only hobble about and can't push him in his too smalll buggy. Sigh.

Getting out of the house for work is definately going to be a big positive change which is scary but I cant wait for!

Thanks everyone for your replies, just knowing i'm not alone helps at this moment.