PND SUPPORT THREAD*********Is this a good idea?**************

[Lindenlass]

I keep finding myself at the very end of my tether, posting on chat or here just to let of steam - just need to tell someone how crap I'm feeling at times.

Anyone else feel like this? Is a support thread a good idea?

Post here when you're crying, trying not to shout, whatever!

[Lindenlass]

And also post in response to support eachother and get eachother through those horrific, intense times.

[sweetnitanitro]

Hi lindenlass, sorry you are feeling down. Are you having counselling or anything like that? I've just started and I'm finding it really helpful. I don't want to go back on ADs.

I've got PND too, I've got a history of depression but I thought I'd got away with not getting PND until very recently. I feel a bit isolated, unappreciated and invisible. DD is my first child and although I love being a parent I think I'm finding it really tough adjusting to my new role in life.

[didsnbump]

I all, ive been to the doctors today for the first time about the way i feel.

He thinks it might be undiagnosed postnatal depression, if not its mild/moderate depression.

He has reffered me to see a therapist but im not sure how this will help me?? I just wanna feel better asap as really starting to struggle with my very grumpy 13 month old!!

[beckiandgrace]

Hi i've been diagnosed with pnd 3 weeks ago im refusing to take the a/ds im b/feeding my 21wk dd and am worried about any effect on her. been refured for councling but they've not got any appointment till mid march.

DD is my 3rd child and i've not had this with th DS's (sorry for any typos n.a.k)

[sweetnitanitro]

I went private with counselling because last time I had to wait so long. didsnbump- sometimes it's just nice to get everything off your chest! Although I can see it's not helpful for everyone, might be worth a go though.

[NotSoRampantRabbit]

beckiandgrace

What ad's are you being prescribed?

I had severe PND with DS1 and breastfed until he was 2.5 years old. I took sertraline for almost 12 months of that time - there is lots of literature and research re breastfeeding and ad's and safety. I will try and dig out a link.

There is no reason not to take AD's if bf as long as you are taking meds that are compatible.

Is more important that you start to feel better IMO.

Think support thread is good idea. I am due in May 09 and am anticipating needing help again.

[Verso]

Wow - this is timely! Caved this morning and finally went to GP (DD2 is three months tomorrow). I now have lofepramine to take and a follow up next Friday. I had PND with DD1 but thought it was due to her traumatic birth and my physical state afterwards. This time, because the birth and recovery were SO MUCH better I have been in denial about how awful I feel...

[beckiandgrace]

NotSoRampantRabbit The dr has asked me to go on them twice and both times I've said no becouse I'm bf. I'm going back weds (at her request) and im going to have them as i cant keep going on the way I have been. The H/V has been very supportive and helped me to see that I do need the ADs

you are right I do need to start feeling better for me and the (very)DC's

[Verso]

becki I am breastfeeding too. Last time round I had citalopram, which my GP said was fine when BF. This time I have a different prescription because I have a different GP and told him it took three increases of dosage for the citalopram to work, and I also felt very drowsy on it and gained a huge amount of weight. He checked in the BNF and only a tiny amount of the this drug "not enough to be considered harmful" goes through into the breast milk. Best of luck on Wednesday.

[Lindenlass]

Wow! How sad that already this could be helpful to quite a few people!

sweetnita I'm just starting counselling - first proper session on Wednesday actually. I'm very nervous. I have suffered from depression/panic attacks/tantrums(!) on and off my whole life, but the periods it's bad seem to be very clearly at times of stress or major change. My 4th baby is now 5m old and it's been around this time after each baby that I've had problems. I've got a nice, meaty childhood history that I think needs dissecting to help me cope when things are bad.

I've got a lot of close friends who are immensely helpful this time, so I really think that being isolated is not a cause of PND, but probably makes the experience of it a lot harder to cope with. How old is your DD now? I found getting involved in NCT really helped and made me a lot of friends in the process.

didsnbump Hope the therapist helps - I'm sure it will. I'm sure that it's more of an in depth healing than medication can be. I'm going private for mine - lovely parents and PIL are paying, otherwise I'd have to wait for months I think.

beckieandgrace have you tried contacting the breastfeeding network? They have a lot of info about anti-ds and bfing. Pdf here

notso Really hope you don't get PND this time around. I guess it will help getting lots of support in place beforehand.

verso good for you for getting to the GP! Hope the meds kick in very soon.

I've had a good day today - been at a lovely friend's house all day. A different lovely friend came and helped me get the children in the car so I didn't have a breakdown doing it on my own! Although did get upset a couple of times this morning.

I've got to get all four of them out of the house before 9am tomorrow morning, so am fully anticipating a full meltdown or two in the process. It'll be worth it though! Taking DD1 to a spanish class and then spending the day with a friend

[beckiandgrace]

Lindenlass hope its not that bad tomorrow morning. just had a major wobbly at my dh.

Thanks very much for the link I'll have a look now. By the way what a good idea.

[Lindenlass]

Good morning everyone! Hope we've all woken with a smile and not a feeling of dread about the coming day!

DH helped me get everything completely ready last night so everything's in the car except for me, the children, and my handbag! I'm taking my middle 2 to a friend's house and then oldest and the baby to Spanish, and then back to friend's house for the day. So, once I'm out of the house, the day should be devoid of temper tantrums (on my part!) hopefully!

Just got to stop myself shouting at DD1 who ought to be getting dressed and is, in fact, crawling around the floor pretending to be a dog and eating currants straight of the floor that she's previously distributed!

[Nontoxic]

I think this is a fantastic idea - I'm beyond the PND stage but I wish you all well and have much sympathy (and you can bf with the right drugs, as others have said)

I do bang on about this, but for me, nutrition played a huge part in my recovery (and I so recognise the tantrums!)

I came across a book called Potatoes not Prozac, which teaches you to stabilise your brain chemistry and hence your mood by eating correctly.

Lindenlass, I'm guessing you've either had no breakfast, or you've eaten 'white carbs' devoid of protein if you're feeling as if you're about to explode.

Obviously if you're daughter is being a pain and you're under time pressure you'll feel angry, but it's such a freedom not to be at the mercy of your mood, and have adult control over your actions.

Btw, I'm not saying avoid aps, just that this is another, more permanent tool you can make use of for ever if you so wish.

[Lindenlass]

Ooh, someone's just lent me that book!

No, I've eaten a good breakfast actually . She has stopped eating currants off the floor and is now just about dressed, thank goodness!

I've also started taking St. John's Wort and Omega 3 oils (on the advice of the friend who's lent me the book you quoted).

[Nontoxic]

Great! I hope you manage to perservere with it . The last 'push' when you finally give up the sugar, was difficult for me, but I think that's because I did it too quickly.

Good luck.

[beckiandgrace]

Morning all. Got of to a bad start this morning DS's refused to get ready for School and played up all the way there.

dread to think what its going to be like after School.

[BlueJellie]

I first admitted I had a problem around new yr. Had anxiety attacks, would be sobbing most days if anything didn't go exactly to plan, had constant headaches, fantasizing about self-harm etc. My symptoms had got progressively worse since having my ds in sept but I was just in denial that anything was wrong until one day my ds was having a crying fit & I nearly made the fantasies reality - finally came clean to DP who marched me off to the doctors. I'm taking fluxotine (sp?) which has really helped with my symptoms, I still have bad days, today being one of them - but my anxieties are not as extreme. I find our relationship suffering slightly though at the mo as I often feel resentful to DP if he gets stressed with handling DS as I feel he hasn't got the right to - as I do most the work & he gets to leave the house each day and get a 'break'. Does anyone else feel they take out their stress on their DP? I know logically IABU but I can't help myself

[Verso]

bluejellie I'm not sure YABU, to be honest. I think looking after a child 24/7 is incredibly draining and DPs really don't get it. I found my PND symptoms eased massively when I went back to work after DD1. This time round (DD2) I feel exactly the same - was desperate on Monday when he left for work for the first time in a week (he's a teacher so had been at home last week). So jealous of him having grown-up time and being in control of his day.

I went to work last week for a "keeping in touch" day and it was the best I've felt in ages... and I'm almost counting the days until I go back in June.

Has anyone got experience of lofepramine? I haven't started taking them yet as I'm a bit worried about the dry mouth side-effect listed, as I'm breastfeeding and get thirsty enough as it is! Also I'm not convinced I really DO have full-blown PND - I suspect I am just (just?!) completely exhausted...

[Lindenlass]

Beckie how did the rest of the day go in the end?

bluejellie I find myself thinking the same as you about my DH, and also feeling cross with him when he snaps at the kids because I kind of think 'blimey, there's only room for one cross person in this house!'. Not fair on him at all as he's being fantastic, even more so now I've started on the counselling.

I've got a very busy day today, but DH is off work. First proper counselling session, which I'm terrified about, tbh, so just trying not to think about it at the moment. DH is in charge of the girls all day so hopefull I won't have any reason to have a tantrum!

[BlueJellie]

Yeah lindenlass I feel that too, he's been losing patience with DS recently and I feel bad for DS, like its not his fault and he doesn't deserve to have TWO miserable parents! DP is really great most of the time don't get me wrong - he simply doesn't cope to wel if DS is being awkward and he has him on his own. He told me e thinks he's a crap dad, which I disagree with but I feel like I can't support him properly as I;m dealing with my own turmoil, and this on top I could do with out. I know that sounds awfully selfish when I read it outloud.

Verso, I go back to work in June as well, I think this will help me no end - just need space away from this house!!!

[sweetnitanitro]

Yep, my poor hubby gets the worst of it, bless him. He's very supportive but I don't think he understands how tough it is. He knows I don't sit around watching Richard and Judy all day but it's hard to understand looking after a baby all day unless you do it. Maybe when DD is weaned he will be able to experience it while I spend the day at a spa or something

[beckiandgrace]

Hi all just got back fom th drs and i've been given sertaline.

Yesterday was so bad I spent most of it crying then relised that it was cubs (DS1) took him and still felt like crap.

My hubby does not know what to do to help. At the moment DD will not settle for him and she realy screams until I take over then I resent him as he does nothing for her.

[didsnbump]

Hi all, well a crap couple of days for me. I keep waking up with headache, which today went this morning when taking some painkillers only to return a little while ago. What are the headaches all about.
Cant believe how crap ive felt this week even though having finally got it all of my chest to the doctor!!
I cant seem to pick myself up no matter what i try. Fortunally i think i discovered whats making my DS so wingy so thats helping a little.

What your all saying about DH's and DP's. Im sooooo the same. I think that is most of my problem. He has i life still and i dont. Like today, he is in the works bar this afternoon drinking with collegues. What about me.....ummmmm lets think yes stare at these walls again and maybe clean if i can muster the energy!!!!

[Verso]

How long do the ADs take to start working? I am going to start mine today...

DH and I had a massive row this morning after I'd had 3 hours' sleep again. He thinks I don't understand/sympathise with his MS fatigue enough. Not the best thing to say to a severely sleep-deprived woman. He left without speaking to me .

I just feel so unsupported and alone and like I'm drowning/failing. I have however had some help today - asked a local postnatal doula if she could take DD2 for a few hours so I could sleep. Irony is I'm so wired I only got an hour of fitful sleep - which has made me even more anxious .

[beckiandgrace]

Hi all. Hows it going today?

started to take the ADs yesterday and i've become very hyper i cant stand or sit still its really weird.