Is there anything I can do in advance to prevent PND?

[iwouldgoouttonight]

I'm 39 weeks pg with DC2 and I've started to get really anxious and scared about how I'm going to cope. When DS was born I remember spending the first few months feeling despair and crying a lot of the time, and basically just wondering what on earth I'd got myself into. I know that part of it was because I had problems breastfeeding and was feeding every hour day and night for the first few weeks and DS still cried in between, so I had very little sleep which didn't help, and I absolutely dreaded the evenings because I knew we would just spend from 6pm until the next morning walking round trying to comfort a crying baby. I got support from my partner and family, and the HVs were quite helpful, but when I went to the doctor in tears saying I couldn't cope, he just dismissed it and suggested doing some exercise to make me feel better (not sure when he expected me to fit that in!!)

I thought if I spoke to my MW about it they might be able to prepare me a bit better, or at least put it in my notes so they can look out for signs once the baby is here. But every time I see the MWs I always feel so rushed, there are always at least two of them plus a student and one takes your blood pressure while the other finds the heartbeat and the other writes on your notes and I'm normally in there for two minutes and then feel pushed out of the door! I tried to talk to them about it yesterday - I said I wasn't diagnosed with PND last time but found it very hard to cope and how worried I am about feeling the same this time, and it might be even harder with a toddler to look after as well. They basically just said 'yes it is difficult but we all get through it - once the baby is a couple of weeks old it'll just fit in and you'll all be back to normal'. I said I found it very hard to cope with lack of sleep last time, and one of them said that with her, she did the night feeds and her partner got up in the morning with the toddler so she could have a lie in and catch up on some sleep until the baby woke up. I said thats fine if the baby sleeps but what if they won't sleep for longer than 20 mins and want feeding every hour like DS did - there was no chance for me to catch up on sleep. She said 'oh, well if you're going to breastfeed you will have that problem - I bottle fed, much easier!'. Then the receptionist came in and asked if I was just about to leave as she had to talk to the MWs about something urgent! She said she didn't want to push me out but it felt that way so I left!

So I don't feel any better than before I spoke to them. I just wanted to see if there was anything I could do before the baby is born to prepare myself because I know once it is here I'll be so caught up in the whole hormonal, emotional exhaustion I'll find it difficult to seek out help like last time. Sorry about long post!

[muppetgirl]

Oh you poor thing

I had sever PND with ds 1 and was petrified when prgt with ds 2 that it would happen again.

My psychologist suggested a pessary that I had after birth and for 2 days afterwards which is a hormone pessary that rgulates your hormones for the first 3 days so you don't get the 3rd day dip.

Can you get a cleaner in for a couple of hours a week to help out?

Can anyone help out with your toddler or can ds go to nursery for a few hours to give you a break?

For now I would make an app with your dr -can you make a double app? - so you have enought time to tell them what you need to. Write it all down so you are prepared and can you take dp/h at all for support? I think you really need to get this aniety out and talked about with a professional and your mw just saying we all cope isn't helping at all.

[WinkyGirl]

I am really shocked about how you have been treated.

I think you need to see someone asap and let them know how you are feeling. When I had PND after my second baby I was put straight on Sertraline. The Midwife said I should really have started taking it a few weeks before DS was due in order for it to be working. DH and I were also advised that I should go to bed 9pm with a sleeping pill and DH would give DS a bottle. Then from 3am/4am I would take over and DS would be back on the breast.

Getting the extra sleep really really helped.

Hope that helps