Would you say I have 'mental health issues? '

[Thinkingoutloud]

I don't feel like these things are a problem, i think its just the way I am. I do not feel like I want to go and seek help but I just wanted to get some opinions.

Firstly I have alot of fears and phobias. Some that affect daily life, such as refusing to get in lifts and not getting on a plabne for example. We cannot go o holiday and I cause alot of problems with the lift thing as we have a few small kids and we have to heard them upstairs, carry buggies etc...

Secondly these fears manifest frequently in dreams. I have nightmares about 4 times a week, always vivid and I always remember them.

I also panic about my children to the extent where I wont let anyone mind them unless theya re at my house, because I know my house is 'secure'.

Anyone elses house is unsafe, if I were to go anywhere I would just spend the whole time thinking they had opened the door and wandered out, been taken or run over etc..

I can't have them near water, not swimming baths, but lakes etc where the water is murky.

I have MAJOR anxieties bout being outside alone, what I mean by that is I wont go out by myself if its pat about 7pm, i never visit pubs, clubs places like that, never have done.

I went shopping the other day and my mum took me there but then she said I would have to get the bus back.

I was terrified.

I was sure someone would attack me, or shout things at me.

She ended up taking me home.

I'm scared of strangers in the street, i find it hard to talk to people.

I have no friends,

the few I do have, i basically push away... not returning phone calls because i find talking on the phone hard.,

i have low self esteem...

I could go on

[VinegarTits]

Sounds like you are suffering from anxiety you also have no confidence and very low self esteem, the things you worry about are things we probably all worry about at some point but put them to the back of our minds and get on with it, because you are suffering from axiety eveything is heightened iyswim, your gp will be able to help you, you need to go and see you gp.

[lilymolly]

to the original question Yes
but thats nothing to be ashamed about. agree its sounds like anxiety and can be easily treated by anti depressants and cognitive therapy/counselling

Why not go and have a chat to your gp

[Ellbell]

I think that the question you need to ask yourself, rather than the one in your thread title, is 'To what extent are these fears that I have affecting my life and the lives of my children?'

I think you've answered this question in your post.

• You can't go on holiday
• You can't leave your children anywhere (I presume they are not at school yet. What will you do when they have to go to school? Will you feel that they are safe there?)
• You can't go out in the evening (What will you do if your children want to go to Brownies/Cubs/whatever when they are older and need picking up at 7.30?)
• You can't get the bus on your own
• You can't take your children for a walk near a river or lake
• You don't have friends (and your fears are going to make it harder for your children to make friends too)

Now try to visualise what your life might be like if you managed to deal with some of these fears (not necessarily all of them - it's not a disaster if you holiday in the UK, for example...). You might find it easier to make friends and to have a bit more of a social life. Your children could go to play at friends' houses and to clubs and things. You might feel more secure in yourself.

As VinegarTits said, these are thing we all worry about to some extent (some more than others ... I will fly, for instance, but I hate every minute of it), but in your case these normal worries are potentially having a negative impact on your life and that of your children, and that's a real shame. I think that you have a lot to gain by trying to do something about your anxiety, and not a lot to lose. I also think the fact that you've posted on here shows that you know deep down that you could be happier if you dealt with some of these feelings.

Believe me, I am deeply sympathetic. I also have phobias (though not as seriously as you; and I have got over some of them as I've got older, though I have developed some new ones to take their place...) and I know how scary and debilitating they are.

Please try to talk to someone about this (starting with your GP, perhaps). And good luck. I wish you well.

[TinkerBellesMum]

Sounds like there could be some OCD to it. OCD doesn't have to be about cleaning and lock checking, partly why I was surprised to be told I have it as I'm too lazy to have a cleaning compulsion!

I would definitely speak to your GP about your feelings, it's bad enough when they take over your life but I'm sure you don't want them taking over your children's lives too.