Ok, so why do I feel that I will only ever be able to do about half the amount a properly functioning person can?

[ohforaname]

Have just started having a few hours to myself once a week, the idea being so I can catch up on stuff that's been piling up because of lack of energy the rest of the time. Today I have basically done one thing on my list that needed doing:

wash the car (not been done for a year )
tidy and hoover upstairs
sort out mound of paperwork
look for new job
organise stuff for going away tomorrow

All I have done is put an application in the post (that I filled in last night), sent one email for work and made a couple of calls. Rest of time I have spent idly mooching about, mning, googling etc really all about nothing much, and I am exhausted! No motivation to make the most of this rare time and sorely disappointed with myself.

Am I lazy, depressed or normal?

I now have to post and run to go pick up ds

[sushistar]

I feel just like this sometimes. But tbh, your list sounds very ambitious for just a few hours! Maybe you are expecting too much from yourself? Easch of these jobs would take me an hour MINIMUM - and that's not factoring in tea breaks!

[coastalmum]

You're very normal

I used to plan to do loads during my child free afternoon every week. Always ended up feeling really down as I never acheived much.

Now I plan nothing other than sitting down with a cup of tea. Then if I do feel like doing a few bits and pieces I feel really proud of myself.

[ohforaname]

Thank you thank you for vote of normalness!

Have been depressed before and am having good and bad days of late. Finding it difficult to assess what's normal as head's a bit foggy.

Yes, very ambitious list and tbh didn't expect all to be done, but it's all stuff that desperately needs doing and I could easily add more to it but don't want to bore!

Don't know when the heck it's all going to get done (bloomin glad car is dirty grey colour to start with).

Please share more tales with me, tis making me feel much better. Oh the guilt.....

[violinmum]

oh so normal. you sound just like me. are you exhausted from working too much? then maybe you need a simple rest. or maybe if you've been depressed recently you've not been motivated to move around much. maybe you could try and plan to do four things on your time off, a cleaning job to declutter, 40mins to email/paperwork/phone, a quick walk/skip/jump to get your heart beating and something for you-hot shower, cuppa and a trashy mag, do your nails. none of us are superwomen, we cant do it all. we all have chores but you need some time for you too!

[peasoup]

Have you had your thyroid checked as I was all knackered and foggy headed for ages and turned out i had an underactive thyroid.

[peasoup]

I'm on medication for it now so less knackered and foggy brained. Of course I still waste a lot of my child free time staring out of windows holding a cup of tea or mumsnetting.

[ohforaname]

Thanks all for replying.
Feel slightly less foggy headed today, in spite of late night and early start again today. Think I am generally a bit overworked and under-rested (who isn't?).

Military manouvre currently taking place to get me & DS to Grannies today for a night out for me & DP tonight, first time in 17 months!

Though I'm wishing I'd organised babysitting for a douvet day instead! That's what I reeeally need and think I will try to engineer this for another time, before trotting off to Docs if fogginess returns.
Hey ho.....

[skyatnight]

This sounds very familiar. I am convinced that what I achieve in a week, a 'real' person would achieve in a day. The more I have to do, the more stressed I get, the less I manage. I try to just do one 'to-do' task each day, however little. It is better than nothing, I suppose.

[twinsetandpearls]

If you suffer from depression it is possible that you are capable of about half as much as others. But your list sounded quite ambitious. I suffer from depression and have associated exhaustion, I am currently recovering from quite a serious relapse and am capable of very little at the moment. I am sleeping at least 12 hours a day and doing very little when awake. Today I wrote a letter and that has left me wacked, although I managed to go out for the evening and that has given me a boost, although I have been naughty and had a few glasses of wine with my medication.

But people do somtimes get tried because we lead busy lives and that does not mean you suffer from depression it just means you are human and need a break.

[Psychomum5]

your list does sound rather a lot for one day, or for a few hours!!!!

how about writung a list of things to do.....in most important order.

aim to do one a week....that way, if you don;t fo on monday, you still have the other days to aim for

if tho, you manage the first on monday, then cross of, and head for the next one the following day.....and imagine the joy you wil feel if you get two done on a week!!!.

it is never good to aim for unrealistic amounts, as when you fail (and you invairiably (sp?) will if unrealistic), then you will feel so bad that you won;t attempt again. and how is that a good thing????

nooooooo.....aim for one stap at a time, and you can only gain!

[Nighbynight]

ohforaname, I think you are totally normal (well, by my standards, anyway!)
I find that if I get some unexpected time, my brain tends to go on strike, and I just lapse into inactivity. I have to be really strict with myself to get things done.

and in my experience "secretarial" type things like writing emails always take far longer than you think they will.

Hence here I am at 2.13 am still dealing with doctors bills.

[ohforaname]

Well, we got back from our little break awy last night and I think it's fair to say a change is as good as a rest, though still feeling quite tired from it all. DP and I enjoyed a night out, seeing friends and getting away from it all.

I do get what you're all saying though, it was a very long list. I generally try to prioritise and get the most important thngs done, but I never seem to be able to get to the position where the less important things get the attention they deserve (like the car!), it's always replaced by some new and pressing thing to deal with.

It all seems on the edge of becoming unmanageable at the moment, and I am feeling slightly anxious. I came off anti-ds about a year before I got pregnant and have, until recently, been priding myself in keeping on top of it all (or at least not feeling so defeated if things don't get done). There are family problems afoot at the moment(I'm a carer) and work is also very intense atm and I worry about making mistakes.

In my heart I feel I should quit work but not sure about the financial side of how we would cope. Really getting to grips with finances is another issue as it feels as though I need to spend a good couple of uniterrupted days at it to get up to speed - like that's going to happen! Forever chasing my tail.

Sorry this has turned into a ramble, I will see how this week goes as there are deadlines looming and I'll be working away for a few days. If still feeling like this when I get back I will go to see my GP. Thank you all for replying, it certainly helps to know I am not the only one and you've given me some useful tips