just a bit bonkers??

[bb99]

hello

feeling a bit odd still. have talked to hv but seemed to be getting a bit better. did not fess up to all feelings etc - i can ace the depression questionnaire! not better now!

feel down, out of control, weepy, fed up, angry, on edge of reason, disconnected, unable to cope with any level of crying and ds is not too bad, plus he is good at nights!do not feel i love him enough - much stronger feelings for dd - and really really really really guilty about these feelings. dh said he'd just like to take ds away and live at his parents when we argued at the w/end, and i didn't care. i would kill anyone who threatened to take my dd off me... just feel like an awful person at the mo and probably am. also have a tendency to hurt self when things are not good, and am getting worried i might do some permanent damage to self soon if this is not sorted. poor boy deserves better and is stuck with me as his ma!

waited over 2 pregnancies to get a beautiful baby boy after taking aspirin. already have cracking dd, usually good dh (fighting like hell at the mo - my fault apparently for being such a bitter cow)

not sure how to broach subject with anyone who can help - i am not good with admitting failure! i have so much that so many people want and just do not seem capable of enjoying it.

anyone else ever feel like this, is it time to contact the men in white coats??

[Babyramone]

feeling for you. Not an expert so bumping for you.
(((HUGS)))

[saffymum]

Sending you a big hug. I think you should see your GP rather than the HV it sounds like you need a bit of support. Have you got a good relationship with your GP?

You aren't admiting failure in fact I think you are fantastic for realising that things are getting a bit too much ATM. Give yourself a break having two kids is hard work.

Your GP will be a good start and don't worry about telling them all your thoughts. They are there to help and so many mums find it hard and think they are the only ones out there that can't cope when really we all struggle and just don't know when to ask for help. Good luck and keep your chin up, you are doing fine.

[naswm]

The things you list sound like symptoms of PND. I hope you dont mind me saying that. I would book at appt at your GP and have a chat about everything. Also maybe get your HV round for a cup of tea and a chat? S/He may be able to suggest some things to help.

Sorry you are feeling like this. I have a long standing history of depression so you have my full sympathy. If it helps you to talk on here, I will listen. (But I know that sometimes it doesnt help to talk, or can sometimes even be impossible to talk)


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