Does anyone else get irrationally upset about pathetic things?

[harman]

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[nogoes]

You are probably stressed, when I am stressed I hold it all in and then get upset at the smallest of things. Last year a rude man in Waitrose pretended he didn't know what I was talking about when I asked for a top up card for my mobile phone. I walked all the way home with tears flooding down my face!

[escape]

What do you mean - what has upset you about Tesco's
I think we all have our own pet peeves, my husband and i certainly get upset about different things.
Something insignificant to one person can have major bearings on another, the tip is to stay rational and balance the upset out in your mind. Does it REALLY matter that tescos did......xyz - if yes, because of...xyz, then your anger is justified, if not..well - its up to you to quantify

[harman]

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[Earlybird]

This can happen to me too, and I think it's linked to control, or lack of it. If I'm generally feeling stressed/anxious/under pressure, I often have a hard time taking unexpected 'blips' in stride. If something doesn't go according to plan, or work the way it's supposed to, I can focus on it far too much rather than just letting go/moving on.

Sound familiar? Don't have a magic solution though...

[Swizzler]

Could you talk about it to a friend who doesn't get annoyed at the same stuff? I find it works with petty stuff at work that irritates me - I talk to DH who couldn't give astuff about office politics and it puts it all into perspective.

[harman]

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[Swizzler]

Hmm, what about

-getting someone else to do the online order
-getting out of the house for a walk
-getting some time to yourself somehow, even if it's only half an hour to to have a bath (if having bath, make sure you take in a cup of tea and a magazine to multitask

[LadyMacbeth]

Harman, I had trouble with Tesco once - their site was really slow and I thought I'd checked out and when my delivery didn't turn up I called them to find out they hadn't received it! I became totally hysterical with the 'couldn't give a fcuk' man on the phone! I was post natal at the time but I can understand how small things can really upset you during stressful times.

Funnily enough, Tesco did actually send me a creepy letter this morning trying to entice me back to using their website, with a voucher attached for #15!

[harman]

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[Swizzler]

What about planning a specific activity for Wednesday - going to a film, or out for lunch or a coffee?

[harman]

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[Swizzler]

Do you have 1 or 2 slots of child-free time a week? If 2, would suggest setting aside one to do all your chores/tasks and then using the other for 'me time'. If you only get one slot, could you divide it up? e.g. 2 hrs at the beginning to do something just for you, then rush around doing the chores?

What do you enjoy doind and find relaxing? E.g. long hot bath with face mask etc. and book/magazine (my fave activity), going out for coffee somewhere nice, going to gallery/library/museum nearby, going to cinema, or just sitting in and doing teh crossword or watching your favourite tv programme... you deserve a little relaxation and a treat every now and again and the ironing can always wait (says she who never irons if she can help it ). And if you plan it - I will do this next week - it's more likely to happen.

[Mhamai]

Sorry harman, busy rfaffing around search messages and your here. I can't really add to the already good advice here but I do believe on focusing on what you want. I remember all the crap you had to go through with your ex etc and maybe if things have settled now into something somewhat normal, if there ever is such thing as normal! you could still be left with some of the baggage of it? You know the wars over but theres still some scars type of thing, or maybe I'm talking through me bum. I can relate to the bursting into to tears bit tho. Anyhoo more

[harman]

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[Swizzler]

Well, that's a start . Hope you have a good afternoon whatever you decide to do

[harman]

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[iwouldgoouttonight]

Hi harman - just found your thread and you're definitely not to only one to get upset by seemingly trivial things. If you're already feeling anxious or stressed it sometimes only takes one little thing to really upset you. I actually think its quite normal to get upset by Tesco - there is the biggest Tesco shop in the world (well seems like it!) opposite where I work and I'm constantly almost getting run over by Tesco delivery vans!

Hope you've thought of something nice to do this afternoon - if you're anything like me you'll try and get loads of things done around the house and not get a chance to unwind so try to make yourself sit down and relax for a while. Not sure where you are but hopefully its sunny like it is here - go for a walk, go swimming, sit outside with a good book, nice long bath, watch favourite film...

Hope you're feeling better anyway.

[IcingOnTheCake]

Your not alone, i stress over stupid things too. Then afterwards feel really silly for stressin'!

[harman]

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[Aloha]

Go and see your GP. You do sound very depressed. Maybe you need something to help you get back on an even keel. Depression is a horrible thing - a friend of mine has just had a shocking bout, but she DID recover.
Make a list tonight of lovely inexpensive things you could do. When I'm gloomy I like: pottering in the garden/going to a cafe by myself and reading the paper and having a coffee/walking across the park to the cafe (I really like cafes!)/going back to bed with a vintage whodunnit/doing ONE task that is satisfying but not drudgy - just made curtains for the children's wendy house, for example. Really cheering!/making a cake or biscuits/Doing pilates on a Saturday morning/seeing a friend/just being out for a walk by myself/making myself something for lunch that I really like - chicken and bacon salad or hot goat's cheese salad/getting my hair cut/getting a pedicure/having a nap/listening to the afternoon edition of the Archers...
Even making a list can be cheering. I would also definitely recommend a walk in the sunshine. Exercise and sunlight are really good for you.

[Aloha]

And challenge those crazy negative thoughts! Do you think that other people who have bad patches also deserve them? Of course not.

[harman]

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[Aloha]

I think ADs might help you get out of your downward spiral. You don't have to take them forever. You might even find once you feel better and stronger, your children will seem less challenging, or at least you will have the strength to cope. Are they reacting to the change badly, do you think? It might just be a phase even. Good luck! And make that list!