Can someone talk to me please?

[Crankycunt]

I'm having some sort of breakdown. I've had a lot of stress over the past few months.

Basically my dad died, I split up with my fiance and I started a new stressful job. All of this in the past 3 months. I'm at breaking point.

Can someone talk to me about anything, something funny.

[WingsofNylon]

What is orange and sounds like a parrott?

[Crankycunt]

I don't know

[WingsofNylon]

A carrot.
Sorry it is the only joke I know. Sorry you are feeling like this. Is anyone with you right now?

[Bluntness100]

Read some of the threads on mumsnet. Will totally distract you...😃😃😃

[WingsofNylon]

Good idea blunt
Head to the classics for a distraction.

[WingsofNylon]

UP we are here and talking. Can you let us know you are still about? If your after funny I can tell you about searching for my car keys for hours this morning only to find them in the fridge. Only option is to laugh.

[Crankycunt]

Classics is good. I will look.

I've got an appointment with a psychiatric Dr (sp?) The day after tomorrow. I am alone but I'm in bed, safe, and I've put the gilmore girls on.

My dad died on the first day I started work. I took a week off and powered through the training, I was sent away for this. I don't think I've even began to deal with his death and it's caught up with me.

I have made stupid mistakes at work, meaning I might not pass my probation. I'm signed off right now.

My life is a train wreak at the moment. I just want to run away, go where no one knows me.

[Kittenrush]

My dad died a couple of years ago, about a year after his death I also broke up with a totally shitty boyfriend and had a total meltdown. I'm talking full blown rocking on my bedroom floor before a nightshift as an A&E nurse. Take it from me, seek help early. Get to your GP. You may have a sort of reactive depression and if you don't address it now, it will come back to bite you. Talk to a professional. Be kind to yourself. You just lost a part of yourself, it takes time xxx

[Kittenrush]

Oh posted before I read your reply, I'm glad you're seeking help. Totally the right thing. I'm really sorry for your loss xxx

[LoveMyRs]

I used to get this feeling. Wishing i can disappear, start new where no one know who i am.
I am sorry you are in this state now.
Try to stay positive and always look at tomorrow as a new day and new start.
As someone once told me life is a big wheel one day it will be your turn to be on top.

[Crankycunt]

Thank you for the kind words

I'm just trying to get to Thursday. Hour by hour.

I'm hoping that willy, willy, willy is in classics.

[WingsofNylon]

Gilmore Girls is a good choice and well done for seeking help. It sounds like you have held things together to make it through your job but long term you will need diffrent strategies to cope.

[PresidentOliviaMumsnet]

Hello Cranky
So sorry to hear you're feeling like this.

In these scenarios we would always urge you to not only peruse classics for a giggle but also seek RL help.
Here for example is a link to our Mental Health resources - here. You could also go to the Samaritans' website here, or email them on [email protected].
Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.
Kindest kindest wishes

[Crankycunt]

Thank you Olivia. Thankfully my meds have kicked in, so I'm a little more level headed.

Thank you everyone, everything has just got to me at once. And my current coping mechanisms are not working so well.

Blah. I know it's all in my head, and it's a chemical imbalance, and I know I will get through. I've been here many times before and I got through.

I can do this.

[WingsofNylon]

You can do this. I hope you managed some sleep. I have been doing a lot of work on coping mechanisms myself recently. I was given a great exercise to do where I had to make down which ones from a list I use and then write the pros and cons of each.

For example:
Cutting off/withdrawing
Pros are that it stops me feeling overwhelmed by other people's concern and removed the pressure to talk.
Cons are that it doesn't allow me to move forward it make any progression.

The really important bit is then acknowledging that this coping mechanism is fine every now and then but not to be used regularly.

The idea being once you go through enough of them you and up with a list of 'healthy to use any time' e.g. painting or gardening and a list of 'use in moderation' e.g. wine, exercise and a 'avoid using' e.g. self harm, recreational drugs

[tectonicplates]

OP sorry if I'm speaking out of turn, but is it possible for you to look for a new job again, if the options exist in your area/industry? It really doesn't sound like the right job for you, regardless if you pass the probation or not.

[Crankycunt]

I am looking for a new job. I'm finding this job very lonely. And I miss retail

I managed a couple of hours of sleep, I've asked for this thread to be moved to mental health.

I'm going to clean the house from top to bottom today. That'll keep me busy.

[WingsofNylon]

Good plan Cranky. Cleaning falls into the use in moderation group. Well done for being brave enough to look for new work. Keep going.

I am 25 mins early for a train and freezing. My thoughts always go a little fragmented when I'm cold.

[BecauseIamaBear]

When I am in a can't do much sort of mood, I find housework is a good place to start..

And the added benefit is that after a few hours, I have done a fair workout and also the house looks better! The physical effort helps me sleep later on.

Schoolboy joke..
What's orange and comes out the ground at 130mph?
An E type carrot.....


Yes it shows my age..

[WingsofNylon]

Ha! It took me a minute to work I put but that's good. Well it is so bad that it is good.
If you can put some happy music on while you clean I find it massively lifts my mood.

I'm trying really hard to remember any other jokes but my brain just can't.

[Crankycunt]

Hehe, the jokes are fantastic.

I've moved my room around, and I've got Family Guy on, in the background.

Next will be the bathroom, then the kitchen.

My heart is going like the clappers, that's with propranolol

[BecauseIamaBear]

In which case, put your energy to good use and the whole house will soon be squeaky clean... God I sound like an agony aunt

[Crankycunt]

Auntie Bear

House is clean, I managed some sleep, now to get the energy to get out of bed and have a shower.

[WingsofNylon]

So that's another day you made it through. Well done. I bet the house is looking great. How are you feeling about tomorrow's appointment?

[Mishaps]

Good luck with your appointment tomorrow - I do help that you find the help you need.