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PND any ideas to improve my mh?

(9 Posts)
Nativitylobster Wed 19-Oct-16 22:09:42

I had mild PND with ds1, I coped well with counselling and citalopram and eventual came off medication and then stopped counselling. I eventually trained as a counsellor for the charity I received help from.
I had ds2 7 months ago. Everything was lovely until 2 weeks ago. Every day I wake up and want to burst into tears. I can't stand dh, everything about him irritates me. I have a short fuse (not with the kids). I'm fine with my boys, they make me so happy it's just everything else.
Dh works long irregular hours self employed. I have 2 hobbies one of which I can do at home. Since having ds2 I haven't had any time for either hobby and dh never offers to give me time to do it on the rare occasion he's home in the evening. when he's home he drinks. I feel directionless and unloved. I've been to the drs and am waiting to see mh team but I need something to do until then. I can't seem to think of anything from previous counselling or my counselling training. Any idea on what to do?

Nativitylobster Wed 19-Oct-16 22:34:14

I should say dh does try and help, he let me have a lie in this morning, he cooks on his days off. He will take ds1 to the park so I can have some one on one time with ds2.

AnxiousCarer Thu 20-Oct-16 15:03:03

Have you tried meditation? Not had PND but its helping alot with my mh. Im using an app called headspace.

dangermouseisace Thu 20-Oct-16 21:06:13

I think it sounds like you don't have any time for you.

Can you set aside a time for one of your hobbies- where DH has to be home and look after both children? TBH it doesn't sound like he is doing much with regards parenting. Have you spoken to him with regards how you feel i.e. unloved?

Wolfiefan Thu 20-Oct-16 21:11:21

When he's home in the evening he drinks? Every bloody night? He needs to stop that.
Each week work out how you will carve out some time just for you and your hobbies.
Any exercise will help. As will getting out the house. Bundle the kids up and get walking?

nativitylobster Fri 21-Oct-16 19:34:44

Yes he drinks almost every night. It's really frustrating. I do try and get out most days.

I keep thinking I should try meditation

dangermouseisace Fri 21-Oct-16 23:15:48

I'm not surprised everything about DH irritates you- long hours, drinking, not taking the kids so you can have a bit of breathing space yourself.…that would piss anyone off.

Meditation is good for keeping calm…but if your current life situation is a bit pants meditation isn't going to cure it.

HappyCamel Fri 21-Oct-16 23:21:29

Can you get both kids to nap at the same time so you get a bit of time for your
hobby? Can you get them to play on their own while you do it? It depends massively what it is, obviously.

My DH worked insanely long hours and commuted. My hobby was sewing so I got the kids in front of the TV with some toys and got 15 mins in here and there. I also found a walk in the sunshine helped.

I had PND and PTSD. It's awful but does eventually get better with time.

nativitylobster Sat 22-Oct-16 11:05:03

Unfortunately 3yo has completely given up naps and the baby will only sleep is taken out in the pushchair. If I leave them to play while I do my hobby I feel guilty, I think I should either be spending my time with them or doing the housework.
I do try and take them out every day otherwise we all go stir crazy!

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