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I need to relax and enjoy life but how?

(9 Posts)
jessmarkat Wed 14-Sep-16 20:10:04

Hi, for as long as I can remember, well about the age of 15 I think, I have always been on edge and found it really hard to relax. I always feel like I have a million and one things that I need to do and am permanently shattered. I have been on citalopram for about 10 years and am now up to 40mg a day. I've had counselling which didn't really help. I know my life is fraught, I have 3 girls (10, 13 & 16). My dh is in remission from pancreatic cancer, my father is dying a long and slow death. I also work full time, and, recently my oldest has been self harming. I find that I don't have the patience to enjoy anything as I'm always thinking about something else. Consequently I think I'm ruining my dd's lives as they will always remember me as some stressed out monster (BIG SCREAM)

rumred Wed 14-Sep-16 20:41:25

not surprised you struggle to relax with so much to deal with. can you drop work hours so youve more time for things that matter most?

jessmarkat Wed 14-Sep-16 20:49:56

Thanks for your reply rumred, unfortunately due to dh's illness he's had to take a huge pay cut so I can't really afford to reduce my hours, I just feel trapped.

Maverick66 Wed 14-Sep-16 20:54:16

Hi Jess

You certainly have a lot on your plate.

Whilst I have no where near as much on my plate I can identify with your feelings of anxiety and exhaustion.

I too have been on citalopram. In my case fifteen years up and down from 20mg to 30mg.
Lately I have been feeling more exhausted and stressed with low mood.
Discussed it with a new GP and he offered me Prozac instead of citalopram.
I have been taking them a month now and I have seen a big difference in my mood, energy levels and generally feel better and less stressed.
Perhaps your medication is something you need to look at.

Also my GP referred me to a stress management course many years ago which taught me a lot of coping skills. Perhaps you could look into this also.

Good luck cakebrew

rumred Wed 14-Sep-16 20:58:13

oh thats hard. maybe speak to GP about changing ADs? can you take some sick leave? and are your friends aware of how tough things are for you? i hope youre getting support at such a shitty time

GoldFishFingerz Wed 14-Sep-16 20:59:07

Are you doing the basics? Exercising? Early nights? Having time alone?

GoldFishFingerz Wed 14-Sep-16 21:00:13

Also start talking to your friends/family about things

jessmarkat Thu 15-Sep-16 07:54:46

Thank you maybe I do need to change my meds.
Gold I do go running whenever I can , I totally love it but then as soon as I get home I just lose the plot again.
My dh knows how I feel but I'm embarrassed to talk to other family members and friends.

rumred Fri 16-Sep-16 20:29:17

you know your family and friends but what ive found is immense kindness and support when i admitted i was struggling and depressed. it has really humbled me. so, maybe try the honest approach? lots of us struggle, its neither shameful nor weak

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