Was not sure where to post this thread...
A bit of background. Our 6 year old DD has always been a 'passionate' little person. Her terrible two phase was horrific. She had intense tantrums that lasted a very long time. She used to bite herself when she got very upset. And me sometimes. Fast forward to now. If she is happy, she is so so happy, and if angry then very much so.
Lately (especially at bed time) she has started to say she can't stop thinking of bad things. The bad things can be about people dying, her not 'being normal' etc. No one around her has died and there is no 'name calling' or 'putting down' of her/her sister/OH/me in her environment. As far as I am aware there is no certain 'trigger'. Both OH and I are very affectionate with both DD's and tell them we love them every day.
Last night she asked me to help her. To teach her to stop thinking bad things. In the past if she gets very angry or upset I have tried to teach her deep breathing and when breathing out imagining a balloon being filled up. I tell her to think of things that she likes.
Any ideas how I can help her welcome.
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Mental health
Six year old DD has asked for help to stop 'thinking bad things'
ScandiCinnamon · 31/08/2016 09:20
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My DS1 is older than your DD but suffers from similar "worries". We too work on breathing which helps a little in that it at least gives him something to do that makes him feel more in control. I have a routine which goes something like this.
I empathise with how whatever he is telling me he is feeling saying something like "That must be frightening to think that sweetie", or sad, or confusing etc.
Then we talk through why his worry is far fetched (it usually is) throwing in some humour if anything occurs,
Then I assure him he's safe, and that it is my job to make sure of that. It's his job to share his worries with me and my job to keep him safe.
And then (or all the way through really) hugs and comforting.
Another thing we were advised to do what make a sensory diet of things he enjoys. If you google 'sensory diet' you might find a list of examples. This is all the things that give pleasure to any of the senses. For example DS enjoys sucking ice, and warm baths, and being wrapped in a blanket, and minty or spicy food, and the sound of fire crackling or rain falling, and fruity smells, and soft and fluffy fabrics. Doing any of these sensory soothing things really helps.
It's tough being a mum when you can't make the problem just go away. Sending you some sensory 
and 
and 
to support you.
My ds was the same at as similar age and still is now sometimes at 12. I taught him lots of the techniques I learnt having a squillion years of therapy for anxiety and OCD/intrusive thoughts, they are based in mindfulness and ACT therapy.
I have always taught him that it is important to recognise and acknowledge the thought as it comes in, while remembering that it is just a thought and thoughts arn't real and cannot hurt you in any way, but trying to 'get rid' of bad thoughts is usually extremely counter productive as is distraction. Instead we 'thank our mind' for the thought and welcome it which I know sounds bizarre and totally woo, but bear with, it is very effective. You also give the thought a label and name as a 'story' if possible (as most thoughts are repetitious), so it would go something like this -
Have a bad thought ie imagining you dying (sorry just an example)
She say the words (aloud or in her head)
'Thanks mind!' or 'Thank you mind'
and
'There's the story about my mum dying again, thanks for telling me that one'
And the thank you need to be genuine, not sarcastic or sad (I struggled with the sarcasm bit for ages 
bastard mind), genuinely thank your amazing, imaginative, incredible mind.
I KNOW it sounds barmy, it took a lot of persuading me to do it, but it really works, interestingly ds just took it at face value and it worked straight away.
For very persistent thoughts or another strategy if the above does not work, is to sing bad thoughts to a happy tune, I like 'happy birthday' and also 'she be coming round the mountain' but any perky tune will do, so (hapy birthday) -
My mums going to die
My mums going to die
My mums going to d-ie
My mums going to die
The more you sing a thought the more ridiculous they sound and the more your brain will 'unfuse' with the scary feelings, this method is really effective.
But the key is, it is all about defusing and dispersing thoughts, never about distraction or avoidance.
Also useful (if you haven't) is to tell her it's really normal to have such thoughts and not to think it makes her unusual or 'bad' in any way.
Also remind her that we tend to listen very hard to the negative voices in our head and attach great importance to the things they say, so if she thinks 'I am not normal' or 'I will have a terrible day at school today' she is likely to believe that thought, suggest instead that she thinks 'I am a unicorn' or 'there is a million pounds under my bed' - does she think those could be real now she has had the thought? All the above are just thoughts, but our minds are generally wired to attach credence to the crap ones, some more than others.
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