Having everything but feeling nothing.

[LittleMissSunbeam]

Hi, I'm a newbie here, looking for a little support from you lovely people.

My problem is pretty much summed up in the title. I have a job I love, an amazing husband, two beautiful children, a comfortable home and I've just come back from holiday. However, just before the holiday I started to feel very low and have felt the same for at least two weeks now. This is not unusual for me, it seems to happen each year. I have started to doubt my marriage, suggesting a trial separation although my husband persuaded me otherwise. I feel like a short tempered old battle axe struggling to cope with a child with suspected pda and ocd. When I'm at work I'm full of energy and feel on top of the world but i right now I feel physically and mentally drained. I have self loathing thoughts and visions of doing myself damage, although I never would do this to my family. I know I have so much in my life and should feel great but instead I feel trapped in my marriage which is ridiculous because my husband truly is the perfect husband....which of course makes me feel even worse!

[Hunsnetloser]

Hello
How old are your children?
I feel very similar to you.
I have never felt like this before. I have felt low, but never with the feeling of no hope or never snapping out of it.
I felt like this for a month now and think a lot of my low mood is due to my 3yr old dd. I love her very much but I find her very hard work & draining. There are also other reasons but my aim is to try and work through each issue seperately, starting with my dd.
Do you think that might work for your too?... Pinpoint triggers/reasons and work through them one by one?
I have not started to try this yet so it might be bollocks, but worth a go?

[kath6144]

I feel exactly the same Op, have a good life, lovely husband and kids, no money worries, good PT job, but....feel so down.

DH & kids are away this week, with his parents, they go every year, I sometimes go for a couple of days but having already had time off for main family hols, I usually enjoy some me-time at home. Chilling, walking...but all I want to do is cry today!

I know its probably partly age (menopausal!) and I lost my mum earlier this year (though I was v much the scapegoat in family and she was horrible to me at times, still she was my mum). DS also going off to Uni, am thrilled for him, but am also feeling a bit 'empty nest' at him going.

We have had lots of health issues with DD over years, including hearing loss, always worried about how she would do at school. Her GCSE results weren't stellar, but good enough to get her onto next level - Business BTEC - except english which was 2 marks off a pass. It has gone off for a remark, failing that she will re-sit and we can afford plenty of tutoring to nudge her up to a C, so hardly the end of the world.

But still, I feel unreasonably depressed about it. Am already assuming the remark will fail (DH says I am unnecessarily negative, but they have tightened the re-mark system this year). Depressed that the tutors we have contacted haven't yet got back to me, but realistically I can't set anything up till we know her college schedule and ideally not till we know re-mark result. And I know its a bank holiday!!

So logic is telling me not to dwell on DDs exam result, it will sort itself, and that grief over losing mum and DS going away is normal - but I still cant shake myself up. I am going to go for a bike ride, which I know will lift my mood, but just getting changed into cycling gear is an ordeal.

[LittleMissSunbeam]

Thanks for your replies, aren't brains so strange and unpredictable. One day we're fine and then suddenly we're not, then we're good again. On Saturday I dragged myself and my family to a music concert I had booked months ago, feeling terrible that I wasn't even in the slightest bit excited to see one of my favourite artists. Well, when she finally arrived on stage and began to sing, I was suddenly lifted. I was genuinely smiling for the first time in weeks. I cried through other songs but mainly sang and had fun. Live music freed me!!!! I will never forget the transformation within an hour, unbelievable! Get out there and listen to someone you love ladies!

[happyfrown]

i'll join you.

im currently trying to 'find myself' my purpose in life, feeling empty and lost even though I have 3 children and a partner, a home and ok'ish with money. part of me feels like I left 'ME' behind when I had my first son and trying to work out who I am now - I cant always be mum! I haven't found me yet....

as with your music uplifting you - I also use music to heal my thoughts, when my father passed last year it was the only thing that kept me going, when the 'other half' is snoring I plug my music in my ears and if I cant sleep due to racing thoughts I put my earphones in

hope you feel better soon