Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.

Grief has just hit dh

(5 Posts)
ridingsixwhitehorses Sun 07-Aug-16 22:52:37

His mother died six months ago but so much was going on in our household with new baby and a job change that dh just kind of got on with things (he is only child so had to help fil with all the logistics etc too). Just been on holiday and he lost it - grief just hit him like a wall. First time he'd had to slowdown and think about it all and he was just crying for his mum. I was so sad. Any idea how I can help him? I know it is a natural process and he has to grieve. and he was okay most the time. But poor poor dh. I always feel so utterly sad for him on the very rare occasions he cries.

poochiepants Sun 07-Aug-16 22:57:43

Having lost both my parents, I'd say just let him cry whenever he needs to and just hug him. 11 years on, I still feel that way but my DP doesn't understand it, thinks I'm being silly.....it doesn't leave you, but it does get less.

gamerchick Sun 07-Aug-16 22:58:33

It was going to come, it's just a matter of when. Poor thing.

Just be there, grief is so personal it's never the same per person. Just the freedom to grieve can be enough.

TheWeeBabySeamus1 Sun 07-Aug-16 23:00:31

He needs time to let it all out, I think that all you can do is let him know that you're there for him and it's OK to feel like this. flowers

elvesareneverhappy Sun 07-Aug-16 23:07:14

My lovely FIL died 4 weeks after DC1 was born. It was horrible. He was admitted to the hospital just 3 days after I was discharged. My DH really struggled in the beginning and it took a while before the reality sunk in. I just let him cry whenever he wanted and reminded him that even though our DC won't know him, we can tell them about him. Also, give him time. The first year was a raw because you have to overcome the first Christmas/birthday/anniversary without them. But once you do get through them, it does become bearable.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now