Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.

Need help

(7 Posts)
Rubberduck2 Fri 01-Jul-16 19:27:30

Please can you help me get through tonight?

I'm in such a bad way.

19 weeks pregnant. Since about 5 weeks I've had total and utter paranoia and fear that my DP will leave me.

He started a new job where he works with pretty much all girls. All of whom are 10/12 years younger than us and stunning.

I have questioned and questioned and questioned the shit out of him about these girls, spent days sobbing at home and generally having some sort of breakdown over it.

He has repeatedly turned down offers to go out and finally the night has come where he's going out with them all. I have been a total bitch whilst he's been getting ready to go out and as he walked out of the door he said he's not coming home tonight. He's said I don't love him and don't want him, treated him like shit and that he's had enough.

Worse part is he's never done anything to warrant any of this. I've been left with insecurities from my past relationship (who had an affair with a girl from work) and up until this point I've worked with him so never had to address the work situation before.

I'm sat here now completely numb, waiting for the horrendous feelings to come, and I don't know how to cope.

I can't do this anymore. I love him, I truly, truly do. I know it's not his fault yet I can't stop myself being awful when I feel like this.

If you've got this far, thank you.

QuiteLikely5 Fri 01-Jul-16 19:31:00

You need therapy. Your behaviour is controlling and abusive.

Jealous behaviour wears people down and eventually has them running for the exit door.

It's likely he will return but this is your warning that he doesn't like your behaviour.

Have you been texting him since he went out?

Rubberduck2 Fri 01-Jul-16 19:36:04

I've been seeing a psychotherapist privately but it's only for an hour a week and I'm under the perinatal MH team.

I was doing much better until this night out came up. He told me on Monday. It's catapulted me backwards, I just wasn't ready for it.

I've text him to say sorry for ruining his night out.

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn Fri 01-Jul-16 21:49:25

You're pregnant, so your hormones are all over the place. You're anxious and paranoid, so it's good that you're under the perinatal MH team.

Do you have a long standing MH problem, or have you been referred since becoming pregnant?

Rubberduck2 Fri 01-Jul-16 22:34:25

Just since becoming pregnant. I can't cope like this. I'm a total wreck inside.

It's just a works night out which everyone has from time to time but it's something I just wasn't ready for. I can't tell you how much it's sent me backwards.

My coping strategies aren't working and I feel stuck in my own head without a way out.

MH team think I have a massive hormone imbalance because I'm not like this 24/7 and when I'm feeling ok I'm horrified with myself.

lemonspies Fri 01-Jul-16 22:44:51

When did he start the new job and when did you become aware of the girls, and how pretty they were?

Rubberduck2 Fri 01-Jul-16 22:56:24

Conceived at the beginning of March, he started 2nd week in March, found out beginning of April. They are all over the Internet with very little clothing!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now