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Please! Anyone out there who overcame bonding issues?

(2 Posts)
user1466956529 Mon 27-Jun-16 06:54:15

Dear Mothers!

I'm desperate to find people who used to have trouble bonding with their child but in the end found that great love!! Im loosing hope day by day and desperately want to know that there exists some happy ending stories out there!

Due to a traumatic periode during my pregnancy and beginning of motherhood, I became completely emotional numb and unable to feel love towards anyone. It is as if I've lost the ability to feel love (as well as grief) - like there is a hole in my chest area where I used to feel my deep emotions. This has made it very difficult for me to bond with my daughter - she is almost 2 years now - and I so desperately want to love her. I feel so guilty and the thought that I might not ever get to love her sometimes makes me considering taking my own life, as it feels like torture every day. I feel so trapped and I dont know what to do! Please, If anyone out there has overcomed such situation, or know anyone who has, please let me know, and let me know what you did to get there! I so desperately need a sunshine story to restore my hope!

All the best Johanne

molassesandoats Mon 27-Jun-16 09:32:30

Delurking to post this as I know how alone I felt when this happened to me.

For over a year after my child was born I felt like this. The guilt was dreadful and and I was so resentful at the situation. Now I love them deeply, my eyes light up when they comes into the room and doing all the work that parenting involves for them is now a joy.

The thing that made a difference for my was NHS therapy after I finally went to my GP for help. I found it very hard to ask for help, and it was a hard to organise childcare to get to the therapy. However to my surprise it just worked, in 8 sessions! The type of therapy was psychodynamic. I'd tried CBT privately before but had not found this helpful.

I hope this is helpful, if only to let you know that this can be 'fixed'.

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