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I'm not doing so good

(3 Posts)
KaraokeQueenOfTheNorth Wed 10-Feb-16 08:31:32

I just need to say that and I have no one to say it to IRL. Actually, that is a lie, I said those exact words to DH last night. He said "I know". That was it, nothing since.

I ache all over, I want to cry all the time, I am not really coping with everything being a mum entails so I carry a huge Guilt around too.

I live a lie behind a veil of "I'm ok" - i confided in a few friends when I was finally diagnosed with depression and not one of them asks how I am doing anymore. Because I get on with life, I smile and laugh, I pretend I am ok.

I have this horrible inability to be able to actually vocalise any of this. I go the the GP and j can't tel, them how I feel. I stopped taking my meds becasue I was convinced they were making me fat, I'm still fat but I am scared of taking them in case I get fatter.

No one would know how desperate I feel inside sometimes, because of my outward appearance. And those I have confided in either don't believe me (yes, one friend actually said that) or have forgotten about me.

DH doesn't ask me anymore because I think he is fed up with the answer. I have stopped telling him anything because it makes me sadder when he doesn't seem to care.

I just need to say, I am not doing so good.

KaraokeQueenOfTheNorth Wed 10-Feb-16 08:33:14

My best friend when I told him I am depressed actually said "don't be depressed, your life is great!" Ugh. This is what I am up against. It is so tiring pretending everything is great when inside I want to curl up and hide forever.

TanteRose Wed 10-Feb-16 08:44:26

sorry you're feeling like this flowers

maybe write down how you are feeling and show it to the GP (or show them this post!)

they can give advice about meds etc.

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