Starting to tell the truth

[Penguinspyjamas]

I have a previous post here. Really would like some views from the wise ladies of MN. Don't want to upset anyone and I am quite new here.

I saw my counsellor earlier this week. She asked me if I had ever had suicidal feelings. The answer yes was out of my mouth before I could stop myself. I started this process to address an eating problem but more than I expected has happened. When I left I started to wish I hadnt told her. The whole thing happened near the end of the session so there wasn't much time. She just asked what things I had to keep me here. When I left I was sort of shocked I had even said it tbh. No idea what to expect next time and I have a gap of a few weeks. It just sort of came out. I am partly releived and partly regretting saying it. Is that normal or just me? What should I expect next time

[hefzi]

Don't worry about it, penguin - sometimes, stuff just comes out: and it's good that it has, because it's clearly something that you need to address. You might have thought that your eating disorder was your biggest issue, but perhaps it goes deeper than that? This way, it sounds as though you'll get the help that you need, and quicker than you might have otherwise. Next time, she'll probably just start off by asking how the fortnight or whatever has been, and take her cues from that - it's fine for you to tell her right out, though, that you want to focus on what you said before: or to tell her, for that matter, that you don't want to, at this stage. It's also fine not to mention it at all, and just go with the flow - do what feels right for you!

She will probably ask you next time if you think you could be a danger to yourself, but that's usual - because that's one of the issues counsellors can break confidentiality over, if they believe you to be at risk of suicide. I think, as it's come up, you should think about going with it - it didn't pop up out of nowhere, even if you weren't aware it was lurking there: but you should do what you feel comfy with - that's the main thing.