"Don't let it get to you"

[LL12]

I suffer from GAD and have been working really hard with trying to control it but something I am really struggling with is whenever something makes my anxiety bad, my very laid back husband always say's "Don't let it get to you".
If only it was that simple, I just don't know how to deal with this comment for some reason as I find it quite dismissive of my condition.
Any thoughts?

[YesAnastasia]

It's very dismissive. I get it all the time. There isn't always an 'it' anyway. Sometime the anxiety comes first & I have to really think about the root cause.
There are some great comic strips that have been appearing on my timeline recently about how you wouldn't say 'just don't have cancer' to someone but someone might say 'Just don't be depressed' I'll try to post some. Perhaps you could show them to him.

[LL12]

Thanks YesAnastasia

[BigBirthdayGloom]

I suffer from anxiety although citalopram has been truly miraculous. Before, it was almost that I was anxious and the anxiety had to latch onto a problem to "function" rather than the problem I fixed on being the cause of it. A sort of chicken and egg situation with the anxiety coming first followed by the thing I was anxious about. Now it's better under control, I tend to be less anxious anyway, but it's about rational things that I need to worry or at least think about.
Dh used to tell me I didn't need to worry about dd1 (often the focus of my anxiety) but of course I did, I was ill.

[LL12]

I was on Citalopram too BigBirthdayGloom, it did make me feel better but in the end I felt it was only making the anxiety and I really needed to fix the root of the anxiety.
I have had some hypnotherapy, EFT and The Havening technique. These have helped the most and I finally feel I can handle the anxiety so much better, unfortunately it also makes me think my husband now thinks everything is all sorted and I should just deal and cope with things easily like he does.

[LL12]

Sorry, I meant to say masking the anxiety.

[quellerosiel]

Yep totally infuriating. See also "You'll be fine" or "I'm sure it will work out". Basically anything other than a concrete "You will not screw this up because [insert very specific reason here] and I wholeheartedly support you".

Gosh I'm not demanding at all

[NotAJammyDodger]

Sometimes I think it is just because people don't know what to actually say.
I wonder whether by comparing MH issues to physical illnesses (like cancer, diabetes etc) which people are more familiar with we do others an injustice by assuming that people understand what we mean by anxiety, depression etc, and when they don't we feel wounded?
My DH didn't know what it meant to me until I told him.