Books that might help me analyse what is the matter with DM?

[mrsmalcolmreynolds]

I posted quite a while back - a good 18 months ago I think - about worries I had about DM (who is now 66) and me trying to work out whether certain behaviours were most likely (a) "just" getting older (aware that's not a simple topic in and of itself though) (b) rooted in depression/anxiety (c) the result of a degenerative condition of some kind. Of course, I realise that it could be any combination of the above too.

The issues back then were mainly around difficulty in achieving some everyday tasks, particularly involving spatial awareness. So things like changing the duvet cover, using the coffee percolator. My feeling on balance was that these seemed most likely to be due to a combination of (a) and (c), not least because the range of things that caused an issue and the degree of difficulty in dealing with them increased noticeably when she was in more stressful or unfamiliar situations (eg. visiting us rather than in her own home).

Things got to the point last summer that anxiety/depression was very clearly causing difficulties that had a significant impact on her ability to do things - she was having increasing difficulty using public transport for instance. We talked about it and she went to the GP and had a course of ADs for some months, and some group talking therapy. She's now finished those and says she feels much better in herself, and that does seem to be the case - she doesn't seem for instance to be getting caught in the "loop" of depressive/anxious behaviour that was getting quite common.

However, we visited her at her house for a few days over Easter and it's clear that the underlying issues with everyday tasks are still present and seem to be getting worse. I think I need to talk to her about this, how it is affecting her, what would be best to do in terms of identifying what the underlying problem is, but I would like to read into the subject a bit first so that I can be as helpful as possible.

I'm not trying to diagnose her, just educate myself a bit so that I can be as helpful as possible. I'm really nervous about putting my foot in it because she is well aware that she's having difficulties, and the frustration of it is a trigger for depressive episodes.

[Cheeseandwinegirl]

Hi OP, I haven't read any books on mental illness and I'm not medically trained, but personally I find the mind.org website a really good resource for ways of discussing mental health with friends/family.

link: www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helping-someone-else/

Sorry I can't be more helpful! x

[mrsmalcolmreynolds]

Thank you so much for the pointers, I was aware of those organisations of course but somehow hadn't put two and two together to think about looking at their sites or shops now. It was a somewhat traumatic long weekend at times and I think I've come out a bit shell-shocked so this has been really helpful in providing some direction for next steps.

Thank you both again

[Latara]

A trip back to the GP may be a good idea. He can refer your mum to a Psychiatrist for older people - they do very in depth tests to check cognitive function, basically tests for dementia. They can also refer her to a Memory Clinic then & do whatever else she needs.

Sometimes depression itself can cause issues with everyday tasks but these tests would help to decide what the problem is.