Any anxious obsessives out there ?

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

I think I might be a bit, I don't know, a bit overly anxious and obsessive.

This have come to ahead recently, I went for a night out and can't remember bits, I am filling my head with all sorts of things I might have said and done. None of them that logical, but I feel really anxious about it. I have spoken to a friend who said I was fine, spoken to loads of people afterwards who haven't said I was out of line, but my body doesn't seem to react to logical thinking.

I have always been like this, over thinking everything, obsessing about it and working it over in my mind till my heart is pounding and my head is knotted. I over think everything that most people wouldn't give a second thought.

What can I do ? I know I could see a GP, what would they say ?
Is anyone else like this ?

[SnakeyMcBadass]

Yep. I take citalopram and had cbt. I feel a million times better than I did. Seeing your GP is a great start.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Thanks Snakey. I know I should see my gp, I just don't want to because then it means I actually have something wrong with me. I know how silly that sounds, because I am starting to realise I actually might have something wrong with me and I want to feel better.

[LEMmingaround]

The thing is, you do have something wrong - you have anxiety (as do i) but it is very treatable, you may need medication or you may need counselling to adress the negative thoughts. But you can sort it out.

I too am on citalopram. As are many people who i know.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

I know, I know that, it's a weird feeling to realise that me worrying is more than that, although it's strangely reassuring to know it's not just me and it can get better.
I will phone GP tomorrow.
Thanks for replying.

[LEMmingaround]

It is scary and of course having anxiety makes it scarier. I am very open about my condition and as a result lots have people have said they are on medication for anxiety so you are definitely not alone.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Thanks Lem, it is scary. At the moment I get waves, which in a way is ok because at least I get a break from the tense gut and panicked feeling, I am really trying to watch nice things on tv and not drink too much coffee. Does anything else help ?

[puzzlepiecebehindthecouch]

I am really sorry you feel like this. I used to feel this way too, it was agonising and all consuming. I thought it was just me but I read up on it and found that it was definitely 'a real thing' and that others suffered too. Talking therapy can be excellent. Don't be afraid to see your GP, try to be brave and take steps to stop the suffering you are experiencing.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Thanks, talking about it to people who understand makes it seem a lot less daunting. I actually feel like I can sort it out, I felt a bit hopeless before.
I think my Mum has it too tbh and my Nana, I see so many of my anxious traits in them, and when it's them it so easy to say no come on, that's not what is going to happen, it's harder to do to yourself.
Thanks so much for your replies, they really have helped. I don't feel so anxious about calling GP now.
What do I say though ? Shall I say what I said in my op ?

[LEMmingaround]

Yes - it would be a start. Ive picked up that your thoughts bother you and wont stop once they start - unwanted negative thoughts. Mention that you feel it physically -the pit of stomach feeling.

What helps me with the thoughts is giving myself a talking to. Sort of come across all school mistressy and lay it on the line why the thoughts are irrational. Once ive gone past a certain stage that doesnt help though.

What surprised me recently was chamomile tea -had a recent health scare and was in a bad way mentally. In desperation I bought some (its an acquired taste! !). It really helps me and ive becone a bit of a herbal tea addict.bachs rescue remedy is good too

Alcohol knocks me back so I avoid

I am on citalopram which is what helps me more than anything.

[LEMmingaround]

Oh and please dont be worried abouf talking to gp. They will have heard it msny times before

[twentyten]

Perhaps write down your thoughts before you see gp?

This is so common. Medication really helps. Be brave!!

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Yes, that's exactly it Lem, unwanted negative thoughts and they just snowball. To the point where I can convince myself they're true and get myself worked up in to a horrible state.
I spoke to a mate today and said I was worried about being a pita when we went out, she was like what are you on about, why worry we had a good night. I am relieved in a way because some of the anxiety has lifted, because I know I didn't do anything wrong, but in kind of highlights that I really need to get it sorted, I have been doing this for so long it seems almost normal.
Got a GP appointment for the 9th. Dp is off that day, so I won't have to arrange childcare.
Feeling a lot less anxious and a lot more positive.
Thanks so much, you have really helped.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

I'm exhausting myself recently with over thinking and 'what ifs.'

I'm starting counselling next week, I'm sure it'll help.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Its horrible Dame, sorry you feel like this too.
Hope the counselling helps.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Thanks, hope your appt goes well too :)

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Thanks Dame, I feel a lot better today. My heart is still a bit racey and I am really tired but otherwise ok. Not many negative thoughts, which is the worse thing I think, it makes you doubt what is real or logical.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

I feel tons better knowing I have a plan in place, at least I'm being proactive I suppose. The woman I'm going to see specialises in anxiety-perfect!

[LEMmingaround]

Loving the name Dame! i do like a bit of diazepam from time to time! It is most definately good that you have a plan in place, help you to take control which is what i feel we often need with anxiety, the ability to take control but also not to fall apart when things are beyond our control. I know it sounds really trite and im not especially religeous but i often think of this prayer - sometimes it helps, sometimes i need the diazepam!

The Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

There is more, but this is the bit that i remember and TRY to think about when i feel things spiralling out of control - you don't have to believe in god or anything i don't think, just the sentiment.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

I like the serenity prayer Lem, a very good sentiment. I will try to repeat it to myself when I can feel myself getting worked up.

[AryaOfHouseSnark]

Not feeling that great so far today, I know I just have to talk myself down and relax, Trying to distract myself on the property porn thread.
One of the dts woke me up at 5. Yes 5, his eyes are not tired and his tummy was hungry apparently. I was going to try and sleep on the sofa for a bit, but my heart is pounding too much now.
Might try a shower instead.

[LEMmingaround]

It is often worse in the morning as that's when your cortisol levels peak. I often wake up in a state of panic. It does get better as the day goes on.

[LEMmingaround]

Proprty porn is a great distraction :)

[twentyten]

Have you had a look at the headspace app? Free trial and not woo but mindfulness which is a great way to relax.
Property porn good too!!!

[SilveryMoon]

Hi. I'm just beginning to realise that that feeling I live with is not normal. That what I feel all the time is anxiety. It's nothing else, just anxiety all the time and about everything.
I over think everything to the point it's a running joke with everyone I know. I'm always worrying, I'm paranoid, I think everyone's against me, is horrid. Ok, I know people aren't against me, I know that really, but they are. Do you know what I mean?
I'm sat here now trying to decide whether to hit post or not..........