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Really not very well

(7 Posts)
reallynotverywell Sat 14-Dec-13 20:29:42

I am really struggling at the moment, constant negative thoughts. I went through a decade of an abusive relationship while also being rather ill (9 plus operations, lots of heavy medication). I made some bad decisions in a haze of heavy medication and in a bid to survive. There were times when I weighed less than six stone while pregnant because I did not have food.

I really think its probably some kind of post traumatic stress. I am on tablets for anxiety.

My anxieties have reached top level, I spend all my time outside of work googling situations which I think may affect me and worrying about them over and over.

I am a single mum and my abusive ex is still trying to control and abuse and threatening to kill himself and blaming me for it, he is extremely manipulative though and very passive aggressive and I am terrified he will some how get dd.

I really am clearly not well but scared of losing dd if I seek more help.

SnowyMouse Sat 14-Dec-13 20:43:40

((( really ))) Perhaps you need to discuss with your GP how well your tablets are/aren't working? I don't think that would meant that you lose your DD.

Take care

Mrsbear1 Sat 14-Dec-13 20:49:31

Hi really. It's awful isn't it? I have the same thing. Constant, constant negative thoughts and an obsession with Googling symptoms. I don't have the answer unfortunately but you're not alone.

What I do know though is that you will not lose DD if you seek help. Anxiety is extremely common. You could try ADs or CBT. I've can't do ADs but I plan to try CBT. X

reallynotverywell Sat 14-Dec-13 20:49:49

I stupidly did not report the abuse I just fled but he caught us going and smashed house to pieces, dd made a disclosure about an incident at school last year but that is all that is on record.

Exh is very charismatic and educated and charming in public, if he thought he could get tax credits by getting dd he definitely would, when I left he told me to leave her with him or take her but leave her tax credits payments. Our joint friends were gobsmacked and some did not believe me when they found out what he had done.

reallynotverywell Sat 14-Dec-13 20:52:43

sorry xpost mrsbear

Yes googling symptoms medically.
Googling what happens when a baliff comes even though none has said they are coming (exh ran up massive debts and we lost our home) and I am repaying most of debt I know about.

Googling consequences of bad decisions.

Mrsbear1 Sat 14-Dec-13 21:02:26

I think 'challenging' thoughts is one helpful solution but I know how it gets when you just can't even do that.

I gave recently started a little hobby and doing that for an hour suspends worries for that hour. And then sometimes I can think about the hobby in the day.

Also...a single glass of wine on a night :-/

Mrsbear1 Sat 14-Dec-13 21:02:41

* have

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