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So much going on right now, need to catch my breathe.

(9 Posts)
Crawling Thu 17-Oct-13 12:59:19

I was diagnosed as scizoaffective 3 years ago since then my dc2 has been diagnosed with severe autism. My dc 1 is being assessed for asbergers. My dc3 has a moderate speech delay. I've just been informed dc2 needs a operation. I'm having major marital problems as a result of my illness and I'm in danger of losing either my best friend or my dh.

I just want to curl up and ignore life I don't know how to keep going. Shut just keeps on happening I argue with dh nearly every night. My mother who was a major support provider has just returned to work. I'm stuck in the house day in day out all alone now seeing my friend once a week. I just don't know how to keep going.

Crawling Thu 17-Oct-13 13:02:51

I have no other friends btw and find it difficult to get friends because I suffer with paranoia.

DumDum32 Thu 17-Oct-13 21:30:46

awww crawling didn't wanna read & run. are u on any medication? does it need reviewing as it sounds to me like there not working particularly well.

give yourself a break you have a lot going on & losing ur mum as a support can't be easy.

my advise would be to try sitting down with ur DH & talk without either of u trying to get upset. u both need to support eachother. HTH's (sorry not great at advise giving).

ScreamingNaanAndGoryOn Thu 17-Oct-13 22:09:23

That sounds really shit Crawling. My DS has ASD and its really hard work, isn't it?

I have a good friend who's DD has severe Autism and the best advice I ever saw her give was that you should never underestimate how draining it can be when you're the daily carer for someone.

Anyone, anyone at all who has children with SN can struggle at times and I think you need to give yourself some credit for the fact that you are doing it with 3 children and with your own MH problems thrown in for good measure.

First of all, please don't give yourself a hard time for finding it difficult at the moment. I remember your other thread about your DH and your friend, and I'm sorry that's no better. If you find it hard to make friends then the prospect of losing one must be even harder. Did you get anywhere talking to your DH about it?

You can keep going, but I'm not surprised you're finding it so hard at the moment. xx

BOF Thu 17-Oct-13 22:17:02

It does get better, it really does, but there will be ups and downs with it. Can you go back to your doctor and get some more help for your mental health? It's exhausting doing what you're doing, and it can push the most together person to their limits- I'm so sorry you are having such an awful time at the moment xx

Crawling Fri 18-Oct-13 07:56:54

I've just had to drop a med because it was making my hair fall out. So I want to see if I can manage without another med added, because my pychiatrristwants to add lithium. I'm not too fussed on going on lithium.

Screamingnaan things are a little bit better between me and my dh but we still argue every night.

I'm just exhausted I want to be admitted for a break but I know I can't as dh has no holidays left to take off and look after the dc. Thanks for all replies it means a lot.

MyMotherHadMeTested Fri 18-Oct-13 08:08:29

Sorry things are so tough for you, anyone would struggle with so much going on. Do you have a CPN/ support worker for you? Can you get any respite care or a support worker to help you with your DCs?
Hope you find some help soon xx

ScreamingNaanAndGoryOn Fri 18-Oct-13 16:04:49

Meds are a nightmare aren't they. I'm a bloody heifer on mine. The only thing that stops me from getting really big is exercise, but as soon as I stop it piles on. Hair loss is a new horror though. I don't blame you for stopping at all.

I'm not fussed about lithium either - do you think it would be worth a go though?

What do you think would help you get through the day? Do you get any time to yourself at all? I know making time for yourself when you have kids with SN is almost impossible, but you need to shoehorn in some time for you somehow, even if its just going for a walk around the block.

(I was about to say "going for a bath" then, but in my experience of HCPs, having a bath seems to be the standard response to 'do something to relax' and I'm starting to get bath aversion wink)

Crawling Sat 19-Oct-13 09:17:07

Hi I do have some me time but not much and certainly not everyday. Maybe I should make more effort to do something for me. As for lithium I will try it but I want to try and see if I stabilize on my current meds first. I'm big too thanks to meds.

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