Hi there, I could really use some advice.
I pretty much know I am anorexic. I seriously don't fit the demographic; I'm in my mid 40s with no food issues at all before this year. Because of this it's impossible to get taken seriously as apparently this is very rare. I mentioned to my GP on a visit about something else that I was struggling with eating and worried about the weight I had lost. It was a huge thing for me to say that to her as it's been a very long road to even admit to myself there is an issue, let alone anyone else. But she just brushed it off and said "Oh well, try to eat healthily." (eat doughnuts might have been better advice!) I then had the emergency GP out a couple of weeks back as my heartbeat had been over 130 all day and I was reacting to some medication. I cannot believe he didn't question my weight when he listened to my heart. Then I start thinking maybe I really am fat after all.
Family and friends are getting increasingly concerned and all anyone comments on is how thin I am. DH and my two DDs keep trying to make me eat. I usually give in to DD1 as it upsets her so much, but I run rings round DH, to be honest. If no one forces me to eat, I don't eat. I've become a person I don't recognise, lying to the people I love most and even I don't really understand why.
A friend of mine has an anorexic sister and she gave me the number of a lady this sister goes to who is apparently very good. Friend is literally begging me to make an appointment with this person, but it is private and money is tight.
On Thursday I'm due a follow up docs appointment I've been waiting weeks for to deal with the constant heart palpitations and fast heartbeat I'm getting. I'm wondering whether to push the anorexia issue.
But I'm worried about being brushed off again. Also being brushed off is dangerous; every time I'm ignored by the doctors it's like a kind of challenge; I'm not thin enough for them to see it so I lose even more weight. I'm also worried about it being on my medical records. I teach and I would have to disclose this on any new job application. They don't take kindly even to mild depression as I found out once before.
Sorry, that was long.
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Mental health
Private or NHS (assuming they care)help for eating disorder? could use support
6 replies
musicposy · 14/10/2013 22:28
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