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Not sure what to do, advice please

(2 Posts)
TheSilverySoothsayer Sun 06-Oct-13 00:54:54

Keep well away from it all, would be my advice, I am afraid. You may want to support her, but for whatever reason, she cannot be trusted at the moment. I can foresee only angst for you, leave it to the professionals.

Itsallabout Sat 05-Oct-13 23:38:25

I really need some advice on how best to approach a situation with my ex sil.

There is rather a long backstory but I will try to keep it as short as possible. My bil separated from his partner 3 years ago and sil was left devestated by the split. Not long after she found out she was pregnant and they briefly tried to make another go of things but it didn't work out.

Sil had the baby and everything was fine and they shared custody.

Fast forward 3 years and bil meets some-one else and they decide to marry. Ex sil is furious and stops contact every time she doesn't like a situation. She also starts a new relationship ( though no-one has met or even seen her new boyfriend)

Last year when bil announces his wedding date. Ex sil announces that she has cancer. She goes through chemo and it dooesn't work so has surgery. She is then told her cancer is terminal and nothing more can be done. Bil is upset as are all the family and we all rally around to help and start the difficult process of preparing their Dd for what is to come.

Throughout this time sil falls out with most of the family becauae she doesn't like how they are dealing with the situation. I remained close with her and spent many many hours being an emotional support to her. It broke my heart hearing her thoughts and fears for her Dd. They gave her 6 months to live...that was over a year ago.

I began doubting some of the things she told me about treatment. I couldnt understand how she looked so well and was out most weekends as well as going on holidays when she was supposed to be dying. I had doubts but still I supported her and felt guilty for having these doubts.

I got a text from Mil this morning to say that ex sil has been lying about everything and there is no cancer and never has been. She is having some mental health issues and Social services are now involved. I know nothing more other than what mil texted me.

I don't really know much about mental health issues. I feel that I should let ex sil know that I know she doesn't have cancer but Im not sure if this the best thing? I want to support her but at the same time I need to protect my-self from anymore distress ( I know this sounds selfish but I have my reasons).

How do I deal with this?

Thanks

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