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Health anxiety anyone ?

(95 Posts)
Lonelybunny Wed 24-Apr-13 20:31:43

I seem to have a problem with health anxiety. I think it was triggered by PND . My daughter is now nearly 9 months . Every pain, twinge , symptom I think it's something really serious. I've already thought I have a brain tumour, back cancer, lymphoma, bladder cancer , and now breast cancer. I last went to the GP last Friday after finding a lump in my breast (I'm breastfeeding ) she said she can't feel it and thinks its glandular breast tissue , and to come back in a month. Well I nearly broke down last week after being silly and googling everything . I'm on the verge of going back to the GP as I'm still freaking out and it's really ruining my life at the moment. Anyone else suffered with this sort of anxiety before ?

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 09:01:09

I meant I wanted a telephone consultation sill fat fingers on iPhone

MrsNPattz Fri 26-Apr-13 09:28:24

Good luck! And well done for making the appointment, that's the first step xx

rightsaidthread Fri 26-Apr-13 12:13:08

Hi OP your post could have been written by me.
Can't be arsed to name change but do tend to keep my health anxiety a secret in RL.
I also think every twinge is the start of something serious. I'm a little improved from stopping googling but sadly I would say every day I have an irrational fear about my health.
Hope your appointment goes well it might spur me on to talk to my GP x

MrsNPattz Fri 26-Apr-13 12:46:32

Sorry you are going through it too rightsaidthread, I hope you can get some sort of help too xx

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 12:50:06

I deffinatly think you should seek help too. It's such a waste of life worrying all the darn time ! I can't even be bothered to clean the house anymore and I know it's because I'm down cause all I do is worry which makes me tired .

Lucyellensmum95 Fri 26-Apr-13 13:23:34

Good news about the doctors appointment! Do tell him your concerns about the ADs and weight gain, i have found Citalopram to be OK, there is one called Mertazipine (i think, it begins with m) that is notorious for weight gain and making you tired, you don't want that one! Im a big girl too so certainly don't need more pounds.

I went through a whole thing of not cleaning the house or doing any DIY or gardening because i thought i would die soon hmm It is all part of the illness.

You just have to think, really, what is the point of worrying, because no amount of worrying is going to change things - all it will do is make you ill in a different way but ill is ill. I hope you get support today, try and switch the worry off until monday - if it creeps in, say, Right, i am having family time now - fuck off worry, I'll deal with you on monday. Worth a try xxxx

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 19:24:30

So I didn't go today stupid I know but I figured the ad's won't help me straightaway in fact they will make me 10 times worse at first which I really can't cope with .... The lump is still there like a grape so y the GP couldbt feel I don't know ! Cause it's there I'm not mad i can feel it , I'm going hot and feel sick I'm really wishing I was dead seriously it would be better for me unless someone can get this lump to go away sad

Lucyellensmum95 Fri 26-Apr-13 19:29:37

Where is the lump?

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 19:39:26

It's on the inside about 5 cm up from the nipple on the outside

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 19:40:49

Sorry that didnt make sense so it's like on the cleavage side

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 19:41:38

Ppl say blocked duct or mastitis but I've had no pain it doesn't hurt at all which is freakng me out even more

MrsNPattz Fri 26-Apr-13 19:42:06

Oh no, I really think you need to go! Even if you don't take AD's, just to talk to them!

Lucyellensmum95 Fri 26-Apr-13 19:51:00

it really is likely to be healthy breast tissue, i can grab at lumps the size of grapes if i try hard enough, your breast is made up of glands and fat tissue, so there are actually lots of fatty lumps all together - tell me what you feel when you examine yourself properly - put one hand behind your head and GENTLY push the area with the flat of your hand, like your doctor would have done - you might feel something because you have been fiddling with it but i am willing to bet that if you examine yourself in this way you wont feel anything!

This has got to stop - its the weekend now so no doctor until monday - that means that there is nothing you can do until monday. Nothing will change between now and monday - so do what i said, concentrate on doing something nice with your family, anything to distract you.

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 19:56:14

I wish I blooming had now sad

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 20:09:04

I've done the flat hand thing and it feels like a bump rather then a lump , Both my boobs are different sizes the right being bigger then the left which is maybe why I feel more on my left then the right , I've been good all day and kept busy not touched it nothing it's kept flicking into my mind but I've managed to push it back out but as soon as I get home and it's evening It comes back and then I panic .

knackeredmother Fri 26-Apr-13 20:10:10

I can't be bothered to nc but I had HA very very bad for a couple of years. My mum died suddenly and my so was seriously ill and it was initially missed, I was accused of being an anxious parent.
I should have gone for AD but work with a lot of my own GPs ins professional capacity and couldn't face it.
What I did was- STOP GOOGLING ( or in my case rereading all my medical textbooks!), stop the constant checking/need for reassurance, exercise. I got myself some CBT self help books specifically for HA and worked my way through. They really helped and I am almost free of HA now.
I clearly remember convincing myself I had multiple myeloma and being unable to pick my dc up from school, I had to ring my husband. I then got a call from my GP friend who had convinced herself she had renal cancer!
That was the turning point, when I realised how common it is. That and my husband saying 'you are so busy worrying about dying you aren't even living'.
I hope you manage to move forward with this, it really is debilitating.

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 20:19:37

Thank you so much , I work with elderly some of which are dying of cancer which I think makes it worse , I'm trying my best but I think I've gone loopy , I think it's poorly people around you which sets it off , how selfish of me when I'm not even ill :-/

lonnika Fri 26-Apr-13 20:25:10

Ahhh you r not alone. I broke down at the doctors last week because of this. I had gone from having cervical cancer to ovarian cancer and finally bowel cancer. Feel much better now - taking beta blockers and I know that I am being irrational

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 20:43:54

Thing is I could probably get over it if I couldbt physically feel a darn lump but that's making me paranoid when it's there harmless or not , I've also been scared of cervical cancer too but a smear cleared that up , bone cancer cause my arm hurt , bowl cancer , brain tumour , back cancer , it's non stop really it is I also had a dear of going out and getting lost , I'm also a paranoid weirdo but I deffinatly over think things ever since I was a child , I would worry over not having anything to worry about , I worry about being on my phone all day (cancer causer maybe) looking deeper now I realise I'm always worrying but not always miserable so there's something

MrsNPattz Fri 26-Apr-13 20:47:25

Knackeredmother hi, where did you get the CBT books from?

lonnika Fri 26-Apr-13 21:01:36

LOL lonely you sound like me. Honestly try not to worry. If the docs had ANY CONCERNS you would have been referred smile))

Lonelybunny Fri 26-Apr-13 21:05:31

I know blush darn anxiety

knackeredmother Fri 26-Apr-13 21:24:21

I went on Amazon but ill have a look which ones were good and let you know. I'm fairly sure that if you look up health anxiety on www.patient.co.uk there are links to downloadable CBT pamphlets ( there is a good one by north Tyneside hospitals that's should be googable).

knackeredmother Fri 26-Apr-13 21:25:33
MyNameIsLola Fri 26-Apr-13 21:27:14

I know exactly how you feel.

My HA was triggered by pre-eclampsia and I was absolutely convinced that something was seriously wrong with my heart for a very long time, I even had the A&E doctors convinced I was having a heart attack for a few hours. When I finally got over that, I was obsessed with the thought I had DVT because of a pain in my leg, despite my GP's reassurances, then it was a brain tumour...and it goes on and on.

Firstly, stay away from Dr Google, he's not your friend. I know it's easier said than done, it's bloody hard but it never helps. Secondly, go to your GP and ask about CBT, I've been having it for a while now and while I'm not 'cured' its helped me so much. My panic attacks are fewer and less severe and I'm finding it easier to not google symptoms and be rational when I get a headache or whatever.

Wanting to see the doctor for reassurance and then not believing them and then being too scared to see a doctor in case they confirm your fears is a classic sign of HA too, I went through periods of being in my GP's office every 5 minutes then avoiding them like the plague for months and just panicking & worrying everyday instead.

You really do need to speak to your GP though and ask for help coping with the anxiety. It's very debilitating and scary and very hard to live with.

Good luck x

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