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Mental health

Newbie just wanting sound off

4 replies

Cookie26 · 07/11/2010 02:30

Well like it says I'm new and I need somewhere to sound off. Had my second child a few weeks ago and already have a 5 year old. Suffered with PND with first child but took me years to do something about it. Have had a few down days since having my second child but not as bad as the first time round.

I've been feeling really self conscious and isolated. I have noone to talk to. Husband has called me a psycho, evil, and miserable which as you can imagine doesn't exactly boost my self esteem. What infuriates me is how he can sit there and tell me he has read up on post natal depression and then talk to me like that. How is that helping me? I can't bear to face people. I feel disgusting and ugly. I tell my husband this but he dismisses me. I told him tonight that I need him to stop ignoring me - I think I'm going to do something silly. Not because I want to hurt myself but because I need his attention. He's sound asleep and I'm sat here with pills in my pocket and a glass of water near by.

I just need some comfort, attention, understanding. He doesn't care. Why does he keep screaming at me? He tells me I shut down but there's no point in talking if someone is going to yell at you. I feel worthless.

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JarethTheGoblinKing · 07/11/2010 02:56

Oh darling! I can't believe your husband is talking to you like that :(

Congratulations on your new baby.


Right. First things first. Pills down the loo, get yourself a cup of tea/drink of water/whatever will calm you.

You are NOT worthless. You had a baby about a month ago, your hormones are still going batshit in your brain and nobody is thinking straight, That aside...

Your Husband is being a dick. Angry
There is the possibility that he is suffering himself, but from the lack of surprise in your post I'm guessing you're used to it.


I have no idea why he's screaming at you. I have no idea why he's being such a complete and utter arsehole.

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JarethTheGoblinKing · 07/11/2010 10:24

Cookie, how are you this morning?

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Cookie26 · 08/11/2010 16:26

Hy sorry for the late reply.
Thanks for replying, I wasn't expecting anyone to :)

I feel a bit strange reading back over my post as it just isn't me. I'm frightened by my behaviour sometimes. It's like my mind goes foggy, my vision becomes blurred, (not literally) and I'm fighting against myself to see clearly again and shift the fog.

My husband and I have talked about everything the past few days. He has apologised and understands why he shouldn't have done and said the things he said. I apologised too as I also said some hurtful things and also started bringing up things from years ago. He said he knows that that person isn't me and he wants to help me get better. He wasnts me to go to the doctors but the thought of it just fills me with anxiety. I've spoken to them before and although she was very understanding I can't face it again.

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MissTired · 08/11/2010 16:47

could you get your husband to come with you to the drs?? or someone else?? if you can make that move to go in a few weeks things might be looking up xx i know its not easy i hate drs but today saw a nice one at my gps and glad i did its much better when youve been and you just need to update on how youre feeling next appointment etc. i might as well move into my gps :) keep talking on here i find it helps, hope it helps you too xx

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