Hi I'm new
I have had depression on and off over 10 years. On a happy day I can be very witty, coming up with loads of jokes, can be very giggly. I find that I'm very excited and talk faster than normal. It is like my mind is working too quickly for my mouth to keep up. When I'm anxious or depressed I forget what I'm taking about half way through a conversation. Also on a happy day I'm very confident and feel I will be sucessful at anything I put my mind to. If I can't achieve this, it leads to a downward spiral and I can hit rock bottom. I feel a failure, have no self worth and on extreme days I think or try and commit suicide.
Before I had the children when I worked full time, I could have days or even months having productive days, able to multi task etc. Then I would have a trigger, like a work colleague being bitchy or an aggressive customer and then I would feel emotional and then the depression would start to take hold.
Then there would be days were I felt a empty sshell. I would lack confidence, would struggle to multi task, find it hard to concerntrate and find that my mind would drift away from what I should be doing, like Iwas in a day dream. My nicknames at work was Little Miss ScatterBrain and Miss Consientious, depending on what my work performance was like. I am being cared for by the community mental health team and waiting to see a doc, but worried they will not take my seriously and I'm going to struggle like this for the rest of my life. I just so worried they will not believe me, but I so need the help.
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Mental health
Could I be Bipola or just a personality disorder
9 replies
Bobstar100 · 12/08/2010 19:16
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