How would you feel if out of 15...14 invitees don't RSVP

(15 Posts)
PTTG Wed 19-Dec-12 00:18:35

Recently sent out birthday invites to nursery parents and not a single one of them has RSVP. Granted we don't know the parents personally but it was a very thought after invite which included parents and siblings as well. Guess by basic etiquette people could have responded no when all the contact information and end date was provided. Have people gone so rude and all of them?

pippop1 Wed 19-Dec-12 00:23:53

I'd feel upset and a bit angry. However, are you sure that the invitations reached the parents? How were they delivered? If in child's bag they may not have got through to the parent.

Is the event during the Xmas holidays? I'm guessing that some don't want to commit to a party as they might have something else that comes up.

Anyway, it's still nasty for you. Hopefully your DC is too young to know what's going on.

parrotsandcarsnips Wed 19-Dec-12 00:25:49

This is not uncommon- how did u deliver invites as they may not have reached parents. How far in advance did u send invites out? Just ask casually at school drop off pick up tomorrow. If not expect folks to turn up anyway. I had a mixture of non replies and replies ans some just arrived. I agree it's bad manners

PTTG Wed 19-Dec-12 00:28:01

The invites have gone through... And I guess they were placed in children's bags so you are right... People may not have seen. Does that generally happen? The party is three weeks after New Years.

We have other friends coming over and my daughter is too young to understand it but it really makes me so sad. We wanted to make friends and wrote personally but no RSVP... Even a simple no!

parrotsandcarsnips Wed 19-Dec-12 00:30:18

This sounds too fate in advance I think. I don't know what my shifts are that far ahead so personally it would be hard to commit to

parrotsandcarsnips Wed 19-Dec-12 00:30:35

Far not fate

pippop1 Wed 19-Dec-12 00:31:07

OK. It's early days for a reply then?

Is there any way that you can ask the teacher to get the parents to look in their kid's bags? Would you be allowed to send an email to the office for them to forward on, then you'd know that it got there. Not saying that you would have the email addresses but they surely do.

There's over a month to go then. Plenty of time for some more replies OP.

PTTG Wed 19-Dec-12 00:34:28

Thank you guys! Now I understand this point of view... Am a FTM so didn't quite get it that it's still too early. I will ask the staff to casually check if they can if the invites have not reached the parents.

Like you said I may get reply later on... What bothered me was how come all 14 of them decided not to RSVP...!

3mum Wed 19-Dec-12 22:33:50

As a seasoned mum of 3 I agree that people are really bad at RSVPing. I always text anyone who has not replied about a week or 10 days before the party saying just checking if X is coming to Ys birthday party at 2pm on the 23rd at [venue]. This usually produces a flurry of last minute replies although even then you sometimes get a couple of hardcore holdouts who will just leave you to find out on the day!

SweetMingePie Wed 19-Dec-12 22:36:53

TBF you've probably sent them a bit too early and people are still planning for Christmas. Give it until the DC go back to school in the new year and perhaps ask the parens if they received the invite and if their child is coming.

I hate waiting for rsvps for birthdays, almost makes you feel unpopular.

exexpat Wed 19-Dec-12 22:39:45

I put a please-reply-by date on invitations these days, and chase up in person or by text or email anyone who hasn't replied by then. Do you have contact details for any of the other parents? Or would you be able to nab any of them in the playground?

But I also agree that it may be early days for replies if the party is not until late January - people are probably far too focused on end of term activities and Christmas to pay much attention to anything that far ahead.

PTTG Wed 19-Dec-12 22:54:08

Thanks guys... I agree I may have sent them the invites a little early so I will keep waiting. I got a positive reply from a parent today so maybe they will come as we head forward. I don't know parents contact details to get in touch with them.

RillaBlythe Thu 20-Dec-12 12:40:39

Oh blimey thought for a minute you were talking about me. We had an invite last week for a party in mid Jan - haven't RSVPd yet but the invite had a deadline of early Jan iirc.

PTTG Thu 20-Dec-12 13:04:11

That's definitely not me smile

smupcakes Wed 23-Jan-13 11:25:04

Furious - it's so rude! hmm

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