I've named changed for this. Regular poster. Will post in relationships too
Basically I have been with my dp for five years now and we have a ds aged 2. I'm terribly unhappy. And have been for about two years now.
Having a child has changed my and my dp relationship so much. I suffered with pnd and just thought strains on relationship and the way I felt was normal after having a baby.
But two years on, its about time I at least admitted to myself I am done. He's a lovely guy, wouldn't hurt a soul and his heart is in the right place, but there's just no love there anymore.
I care for him deeply, and love him like a close friend but it goes no further.
I just keep going a around in circles with this. I stay with him for the sake of my son. I can't bear the thought of him growing up with seperated parents. But every so often the misery and unhappiness it causes me bubbles to the surface.
I feel a time has come when I can stand up and be strong and tell him how I feel and that its best we seperate. But, neither of us have anywhere we could go. I am a sahm and no money of my own. I completely depend on him financially. I feel so trapped. He works fulltime but doesn't have enough money to leave. Leave and go where?? How do.people just leave situations like this??
So is it wrong of me, to stay, and put my feelings aside, suck it up and get on with it
As horrible as it is for you, its nice for me to know there's someone out there in the same crappy depressing situation.
I don't know how people do it. I'm planning on getting a part time job and trying to save as much as I can, so I have some money behind me. But it would take forever to save up enough for a deposit for a little flat or something.
But then how.would I pay rent every month on min wage cleaning job? And hiding money from him feels so sneaky and sordid. Irgh!!!