Just found out friend terminally ill

(5 Posts)
MamaMaiasaura Thu 08-Dec-11 16:17:15

Not really sure where to put this. I just found out my ds's best friends mum is terminally ill but she hasn't told me herself and I'm sure it's not common knowledge and. It even sure her children know. Feel so so sad for her and her family. We aren't especially close but definately friendly. I only found out by accident as was speaking toy ds's school about an issue with their tutor and the head of year explained that the only child who attended a detention was hers and that she'd written in. I said I was aware shed written in (I was) and then head of house said yes that she was terminally ill sad sad The head of house doesn't know I didn't know that and I didn't persue discussion of it. Just sat her feeling sad for her and family (lost my dad to cancer when 16)

Whippet Thu 08-Dec-11 16:38:09

Very sad. I have two friends (mums of DSs friends) who have Ovarian Cancer. I'm not sure what 'stage' has been diagnosed for each, but it's still awful all the same. sad

I lost my aunt to cancer when she was 52, and my mum in her early 60s. I still hate hearing when people get it, as it brings back so many memories for me.

If you haven't been told by her, then you have to act as if you don't know, so don't do anything differently. One of my friends says that one of the worst things about having cancer is the way other people change the way they interact with you.

MamaMaiasaura Thu 08-Dec-11 20:20:11

I'm not going to treat her differently I hope. It does explain alot tho, incl weight loss. Feel shit for saying how slim and healthy she was looking, no wonder her husband went off to car. He kids are only 11 and 7 sad

PooPooInMyToes Mon 14-May-12 19:42:32

How is she? Im really hoping you are going to say it was a misunderstanding sad

Parly Fri 11-Jan-13 12:56:35

What I would definitely do and as soon as possible is let the school know you were given info about something so private and confidential during a general conversation. That’s appalling. If her kids don’t know but hear it via someone else’s kids because their parents were told in a similar fashion, Jesus Christ that’s terrible. angry

Given that you only found out because someone that shouldn’t have said anything did – you’re going to have to just cart on and pretend you don’t know. She’ll tell you in her own time and when she’s ready.

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