Just made the dreaded decision.....

[juicychops]

Going back to work
as you can see i am sad about this. But we just cant live off just my dps wage and no matter how much i think, i just cant find anything to do from home that is guarenteed a decent amount of money each month. I don't have to inform work until October so i have a few months to get ds name down on the waiting list of some nurseries. I feel so shit about having to do this. I so desperately want to be a SAHM. Plus, my job is up London so takes 1 hour 40 mins each way and costs £180 per month!! Hopefully after 6 months or so i can get something closer to home. I feel like im gunna miss out on everything my ds does and learns

anyone got anything to cheer me up?

[juicychops]

Ooops, prob should of gone in the other category!!

[TracyK]

why not look for something closer to home now!

[juicychops]

Cos ive got to get ds into a nursery first. I wouldn't be able to get him in a nursery and then that very same day start a new job cos it just would never work out like that. So it would either be start a new job but have no one to look after ds, or put ds in a nursery without having a to pya for it. At least this way once ds is in a nursery i can go back to work as soon as i want and be able to start earning money straight away to pay for the nursery. Then once he is settled in nursery i can then look for something closer to home whilst earning at the same time

[TracyK]

Have you worked out how much you actually need to live on. How bout doing what I did and go back part time. I work 5 mornings and ds goes to nursery. I make enough to cover his nursery and a bit left over. I don't have travelling costs and cos I only earn part time wages - my tax and ni is way low!
You can also get £217 a month tax and ni free to pay for nursery.
If you loked for a job now - most employers wouldn't expect you to start for a month anyway.

[juicychops]

Im not allowed to go back part time as it is a full time position and cant be cut down any more than maybe start half hour later and leave an hour earlier. Plus even with less tax and ni i doubt i would take home enough to make it worth while as travel would still be £180 per month regardless of how many hours i work

[TracyK]

Sorry - I meant part time closer to home in a new job.

[Fran1]

I can try and cheer you up

I had not choice but to go back to work (admittedly it was parttime) when dd was 3mths. I probably felt all the feelings you are feeling now, angry, sad, jealous, bitter, scared stiff etc etc

I couldn't believe how easy i found it, i was starting a brand new job, and i just settled in, even on the first day i felt guilty at the end of it that i hadn't thought an enormous amount about dd, i'd just been concentrating so hard on learning the ropes. Now i feel lucky to have my job as its the one place i can go and not be a "mum" i'm just me, laugh and joke with colleagues like my old self. I have a friend who can't go back to work and is single parent and she says she envies me cos she never gets that time out from being a parent.

I know i know, its different for me cos i'm only parttime, but hopefully you will be able to feel some of the benefits also. I wish you luck in finding a new job closer to home, hopefully that would help a lot! and maybe with the reduction of travel costs you could then consider shorter hours.

It will all work out i'm sure!