what's it like to have a *really* long commute?

[hatwoman]

just wondering if there's anyone out there who has happily moved away from their job but kept it, iyswim - perhaps through a combination of working from home and ludicrous commutes when needs be? is it do-able?

[RubySlippers]

what do you consider a ludicrous commute?
DH had a 90 mile commnute for a while (i did for 6 weeks)

[bran]

A friend of mine moved to Norfolk with her family but kept her London job. I think she used to work a 4-day week, one from home and 3 in the office with one night in London so that she could work a long day. She was knackered all the time and eventually gave it up and got a job in Norfolk.

[LucyJones]

honestly?
It's shite. You have no life. Yes, you get to read loads of books on the train but you're always knackered and spend the w/ends dreading the week.

[bran]

A woman in my office (in the city) moved back to her home town up North and she works remotely all the time and comes down to London every 6 weeks or so when there are important meetings etc. I think she stays overnight when she comes down otherwise the whole day would be taken up with travelling.

[LucyJones]

and the public tranpsort system is too crap to make it a pleasant experience.
Don't know about driving though...

[Millarkie]

How long is ludicrous? Dh has commuted from London to Oxford (took 1 hour 10, motorway driving for most of it) - drove it daily and was fine. Then he commuted London to North of Cambridge (about 1 hour 30 if traffic ok) for which he did a combination of daily trips and staying in a b and b overnight.
Now we live near Cambridge and he has a short commute, and I'm spending about 1 hour 30 travelling back to London on a train daily to my job. TBH I enjoy the quiet time on the train, and the joy of having time to read books again..but then I also work 'short' days since I only do 33 hours per week..think I'd be knackered if I was full-time.

[hatwoman]

well, by many standards what I currently do from zone 6 into London is ludicrous. although the actual train journey is less than 20 mins the total door-to-door journey is 50 mins at absolute best, and on days like today can be 90 (that's exceptional though). I'm thinking something in teh region of a 25 min car drive, a 2 hour train journey (with a seat and laptop) , then a 20 min walk. I know it's nowhere near feasible for a f-t job, but I have good working from home possibilities. just wondering what it might be like to do it, say twice a week. wouldn;t attempt more - that would be ridiculous.

[MadLabOwner]

DH and I both used to commute from deepest Essex to London daily - up to 3 hours a day. Since having DD we have moved even further out and DH spends well over 3 hours a day commuting on trains etc. We are shortly moving a long way north, and he will work a week in London and then a week at home alternately. For the weeks in London we have bought a houseboat as a base for him, as the alternatives (staying with friends, hotel etc) were all bad long-term propositions. This way we hope that it is a workable solution to long term commuting and long distance working. I think you need to have a comfortable base for the week in London, and a good home office for the week at home

[crokky]

My commute used to be about 1hr20 door to door. I resented it very much, hated it and it overshadowed my life. This is esp. because my trains were absolutely disgraceful re timing. I felt so free when I gave that up!

Different for different people - my DH does not mind it.

[Squiffy]

I commute from Kent into the city every day - 1H40 door to door, made up of 5 min walk at one end and 10 min drive at the other, rest of it on train.

TBH I absolutely LOVE the commute and wouldn't change it for the world. It is the one window of peace that I get - I am rushed off my feet at work and rushed off my feet at home. When I am on train I can do all my personal emails and read the paper in peace. We are quite lucky because the trains are pretty reliable on our line. The only time we have problems is when there is severe weather - our DS was trapped overnight by the snow at his Grandma's once because we got stuck on a train, and we tend to have 1 or 2 days a year when we cannot get into work because of the weather.

I would advise always paying the extra for a comfy 1st class seat (for me it works out at an extra fiver a day), and always board each end with a fresh latte in your hand.

[RGPargy]

I also commute from Kent to the city and my journey is about 1hr20mins door to door. That's with a 10 minute drive to the station and then a 15 minute walk from Cannon Street.

I dont mind my commute either because i always get a seat and then i get to watch loads of DVDs on my journeys. I'm so fed up with reading papers, books, doing suduko, listening to the radio etc that watching a good series is the way forward for me!

I think we must be on the same route, Squiffy!

[DrDaddy]

DW works from home part time in Bristol, but still works for her old firm in London. She goes down about once a month, usually staying over for a night and does 2 days in the office.
My own job involves commuting all over the place: Reading, London, Western and E. Europe, Africa and the States. It pisses me off at times, but I wouldn't have it any other way...

[CountessDracula]

I spent a while doing London to Chippenham (driving) and it was fine for a bit but pretty soon became unbearable

[OrmIrian]

I did an hour long commute for 2.5 years - well actually nearly 5 yrs because the commute before that was nearly as long. But I drove, it was country roads so little traffic and I had no kids at the time. I would hate it now.

[Baffy]

2 days a week I think you could do it, definitely - would they guarantee no more than 2 days or is there a chance of "oh, just this week can you do 3 days, oh, and next week 4..."

Anymore than 2 I wouldn't even attempt it. But I think that could work ok.

Especially if it's something you enjoy.

[Lilymaid]

I do a nearly two hour commute to work (Cambridge area to London) involving car/train/tube or bus. DH works in next village. I've found quite a number of women who do similar - their DHs work in Cambridge but they work in London. I read lots of books on the train.

[Baffy]

btw I currently do 1.5 hours each way, working full time, and am a single mum - so I fully understand the commuting thing! 3 hours a day in my car when I could be with ds...

I have coped doing the commute full time for 7 years, but only 2 years since ds was born and I'm now moving to a new job closer to home!

It's like anything, if there is a good balance, and you like the role, then it can work well.

If you hate the role and are doing the commute because you have to (like me!) it becomes utterly miserable. Would rather have the extra 15 hours a week with ds and less money.

[Kathyis6incheshigh]

I do a weekly commute and generally work at home two days a week (though I'm on mat leave atm and I didn't actually do this for long as I was off sick a lot with my second pregnancy).

Quite liked it actually. DH had to do all the childcare while I was away, which he managed fine. I loved the fact that I got a couple of evenings by myself. The train journey was 2 hours but there was a bus journey at one end on top of that and on occasion I had to wait an hour for the bus which was not much fun. The train journey was long enough for me to use the time quite productively.

However I'm not sure it's going to continue to work when we have 2 - the pressure on dh will be greater and I don't think I'm going to feel like I get enough time with the children.

Also when something goes wrong and you're in the wrong place it's a pain - I missed an important meeting because dd was ill and we had to take her to the doctor (she was a PFB and it was the first time she was ill - actually dh could have managed on his own!!!). The appointment was first thing in the morning but even though I hopped on the train as soon as the doctor said she was fine it took me several hours to get in.

Oh God, and there was an unutterably miserable journey home once when I was ill - I should have tried to come home when I was just a little bit ill but ended up travelling with a temp of 102 and then a sodding colleague made out to my HoD that I'd skived off home because I was missing my dd and didn't bother to mention that actually it was because I was ill

Oh yes, don't do this unless your boss is supportive. If they think you should damn well move house then they will make your life hell to try and make sure you do.

[chocbiscuits]

Hi, I do a 1hr 15-ish driving commute each way from Norwich to Cambridge and it's pretty frightful. Ds is just over 2 and have been working there for 3 and a half years. Before Ds I usually went in 4 days a week, sometimes 5. After Ds I was going in 2 days a week and everything was fine until recently when they suddenly started demanding I should go in another day a week and I just can't deal with that. Ds still doesn't sleep very well.

Would totally not recommend!!!!

One person round our way is commuting from Manchester to Cambridge!!! She has 3 Ds and comes down one day, stays overnight then goes back (not for me!).

[Nightynight]

it is mega stress with children

my commute was 4 hour round trip recently, it was not doable.

It is currently 3 hours / day, which is the outside of acceptable.

ds(7 yrs) asked me why I dont get a job in our town[guilt]

[Tigana]

Currently about hour 15 mins each way. Is pretty awful and I am always tired. Have to drive it as no bus or train stops within walking distance of office...at all..Plus is on a tourist route so holiday traffic makes it worse. Lots of country lanes so is actually only about 37 miles, but takes aaages!.

Will working from hoem work for you, your boss and your job? Can you get access to work server from home or will youhave to email yourself documenst the day before/use data stick ( both mean unexpected demands can't always be met, leaving you feeling inadequate and worrying you boss is seething at you for working from home) (imhe)

[weeonion]

i am in scotland and have been doing a commute of around 2.5 hrs each way ( but only if i leave my flat at 5.30am and the office by 4.30pm) the worst was 4 hrs sitting on the motorway in snow! it is grim , grim grim and as others have said - i only do it because i have to. i do resent teh 20hrs a week it takes out of my life. it does impact on your life bigtime...